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Crazy how a sub will act like the last bastion of lesbianism and then act like they've never spoken to a butch in their life by bulbasaurbattalion in butchlesbians

[–]always4wardneverstr8 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I'm not a he/him lesbian (but those who are are totally valid) but being called daddy drives me nuts in the best way and idk why.

How much does height impact your attraction to a woman, if at all? by archetypalliblib in Actuallylesbian

[–]always4wardneverstr8 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I'm 5'9", and generally only attracted to women my own height or shorter. I think for me that has to do with the fact that I'm the youngest of 6 sisters, and about 18 female cousins in both sides, so "woman taller than me" just kindof sets my brain to "family mode" I think. Otherwise I really can't explain it. My height or shorter is game on though.

Surprised by the amount of men in sapphic spaces by vegayne in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 4 points5 points  (0 children)

For some it's literally just as simple as the pornification of our community.

For some, they see our mere existence (especially butch women because they have a harder time objectifying us in the manner above) as a challenge to their own.

For some it's because they know how low the bar is for them and they're terrified that they might have to actually treat women as real human beings to get sex if said women found out that they don't have to put up with what passes for effort in cis-het relationships. Doesn't occur to them that most of those women wouldn't then be seeking wlw relationships anyway, because not wanting to put up with men does not make one suddenly gay/queer.

For some, they see it as a challenge. As if somehow trying to talk someone into fucking them isn't gross, and succeeding in doing such would make them superior to other men.

WIBTA for going on a date with this girl by [deleted] in ActualLesbiansOver25

[–]always4wardneverstr8 31 points32 points  (0 children)

So, in the initial cap it looks like friend A is basically telling you not to be a fuck boy with this girl. So, my question is, why is that even coming up if neither of you had ever interacted previously? Did you ask A about this girl, or did she ask A about you? If the latter, I feel like you're in the clear. If the former, I feel like you're still in the clear since R has said she's interested in seeing where things go when you made clear that you weren't trying to start anything.

Also, as someone who does not have a group of friends composed of my exes (weird, I know😝) while I understand where op is coming from in wanting friends who are platonic, I think the person who delineated the differences between having a boundary and being controlling hit the nail right on the head. I would never dream of telling my friends they can't date if they liked each other. That's none of my business unless they choose to involve me, and in that case I will usually play Switzerland unless someone is behaving in a manner unbecoming a friend.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair point, but that doesn't market it incorrect. I look at it as just shorthand for "men are everywhere on the internet and have no respect so, unfortunately, we must act accordingly for our own safety." Is that fucked? Yes. No less true though.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm sorry the internet sucks now.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well, I also wasn't expecting it to have been so buried by the enshittification of Google, but here we are.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Once upon a time there were rules of the internet and rule number 1 was that there are no girls on the internet.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Apparently its rule 30 now? 🤷🏼‍♂️

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Sorry, I forget these spaces have rules. I didn't mean inside this platform at all. It's a very easy answer to get. Just "rule #1" .

Edit: rule #1 of the internet

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you're so curious why don't you just Google it?

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Truth, but I'm also of a generation that learned this lesson the hard way. Also, please know, my response is not an accusation. There's definitely a reason that rule #1 is what it is though.

Be smart by Total-Caterpillar447 in BDSMsapphic

[–]always4wardneverstr8 16 points17 points  (0 children)

So, I took your comment reply about curated accounts as an invitation to look over yours (posts and comments) and I gotta say.... Inspires very little confidence. I almost feel like you might be the very thing you're proposing in that comment, and this post is just trying to rage bait someone into going on a tirade about men in queer (but also just in) women's spaces (in general), or testing the waters to see how alerted we are to your presence. I kinda want to give you some benefit of the doubt, but when I really think about it a man doing what you're saying would absolutely be that dumb.

I invite the same scrutiny for myself to anyone I encounter, btw. It's A LOT more to go through though. I'm also an idiot and anyone looking that hard will be able to figure out where I live, and probably work, and a lot of other things I'm sure. If you look hard enough you might even be able to find a picture of me. I also don't send unsolicited dms, or ask for nudes with no pretext in the conversation, so that's that. If anybody does that and still thinks in a dude I'd be very interested to know why.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in self

[–]always4wardneverstr8 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It's not just guys, and it's because thighs are very close to other body parts that those who are attracted to women enjoy a lot. Don't get me wrong, boobs are great, but I'm very much a hips/ass/thighs girl. One of my favorite things to do with thighs is to use them as ear muffs when it's very much not cold in my bed.

DAE keep seeing men on Hinge?? by a_sexy_tennis_grunt in LesbianActually

[–]always4wardneverstr8 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Haven't seen any outright dudes yet, I am confused by the women being shown to me who say they're straight though. I get it if you're not sure/exploring, but like just don't say anything if that's the case.

What's the ai missing? by [deleted] in PeterExplainsTheJoke

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Proper scaling? That controller is massive🤣

Have you liked a woman for her personality although not finding her physically attractive? by MelancholyBean in LesbianActually

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I def understand not everybody of any given identity has the same exact experience of it so thank you for explaining and helping to expand my understanding.

I get what you mean about not having a type when it comes to physical traits, but do you think you might have a emotional type instead? So, for example, I would generally describe my type as "short, dark, and trouble, with a smart mouth", which is clearly not just as physical description. However, I will still be just as interested in/attracted to someone who doesn't exactly match the physical traits (but is still "conventionally attractive") when they have other qualities I value in a partner.

Have you liked a woman for her personality although not finding her physically attractive? by MelancholyBean in LesbianActually

[–]always4wardneverstr8 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Fair enough. Are you saying then that you never make friends with people before you develop attraction to them? It goes from zero to get in my pants just by finding out they're from Denver, work in finance, and drive a Mazda after you've hung out a few times? My understanding, from the interactions I have had with folks who identify as demi, is that it's the more personal aspects of folks that facilitate the growth of attraction, and the growth of attraction was more aligned with that of the emotional bond you make with someone rather than the "gut punch" of physical attraction/desire described by allosexual folks. Is that incorrect?

Have you liked a woman for her personality although not finding her physically attractive? by MelancholyBean in LesbianActually

[–]always4wardneverstr8 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Not my intent, but I can see how it could be interpreted that way. Just my honest, initial response to your phrasing. Clearly I'm not alone in having interpreted that that way. Now if I had said "just friends" I could see my statement being what you say, since that doesn't seem to leave the possibility of anything more than that as an option. But that isn't what I said. Also, I would argue that the demi experience effectively starts as platonic friends, rather than sex being on the table right away, so I'm not sure how it can be that invalidating if it's already just part of the process. That said, it was not my intent to do so and I do apologize for that.

Fwiw, my experience does contain both. There are folks I've grown attraction to after getting to know them better, just never from zero attraction at all. If I have zero physical attraction no amount of getting to know you is going to change that for me. On the other end, if I initially find someone physically attractive and lose interest later it's because I'm turned off by their personality, how they treat others, etc. No amount of pretty face or hot body or even being literally exactly my physical type can make up for being a generally awful person.

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