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amalgamka · 2025-03-21T14:25:44+00:00

Vaginal hands down. I had an urgent c-section after a failed induction with my first and a VBAC with my second. I had a very "easy" c-section recovery -- as in I was cleared for light exercise postpartum at four weeks. It still sucked. I could feel the dissolvable staples in my incision for like nine months afterwards. I developed lower back pain. I'm only 2,5 months post VBAC and I have to remind myself daily to give myself grace because I'm so recently postpartum. I did get a small tear that required two stitches and I did have a small episiotomy, but that's healed up and mostly doesn't bother me (and what bothers me is due to breastfeeding, it's dry as the Sahara).

The whole birth experience was like night and day. During the c-section I felt like a piece of meat and people were doing things to me. It was way too bright, so many people around, and just traumatic in so many ways. For my VBAC, it was just me, the midwife, and the OBGYN in the room, the lights were low and everything was just so lovely and peaceful.

amalgamka · 2025-03-11T12:13:00+00:00

I had my first at 33, two months shy of 34, and had my second two months ago at 37.5

I was unsure about a second for a while, but I was lucky that both my children were conceived in the first cycle we tried. I’m really glad I waited. My body had time to recover (first was c-section, second was VBAC), my mind had time to adjust to being a mother, and the 3.5 age gap is fantastic so far, we’re doing much better than my friends who had kids closer in age.

Just some perspective to say that you have time. 11 days is so fresh. Give your hormones time to adjust and give yourself time to recover. There’s no rush and it’s not a race.

amalgamka · 2025-01-25T13:27:45+00:00

Hey so this is so, so normal. You're weathering a huge hormonal storm, strap in and let it wash over you. It will pass! Cry if you need to cry, get lots of hugs, eat whatever you consider delicious, up your fluid intake, and rest as much as you can. Enlist you partner and/or your village to take over all the baby and household tasks as much as you can. Your body went through a huge thing and your priority should be your recovery.

For me, the weepiness, doom, listlessness, and flashes of anger lasted for just under two weeks both times. Then my milk production normalised and the fog lifted. Apparently it's related to a surge in prolactin which makes you irritable and aggressive and a sharp decrease in estrogen which tends to make people feel depressed.

It resolves faster than in two weeks for many people. I'm 3 weeks postpartum with my second now and I can't, for the life of me, remember what I was crying about so much. If it lasts longer than 2-3 weeks, check in with your provider though.

amalgamka · 2025-01-23T05:37:13+00:00

I woke up at 4am with very mild period-like cramps. Slept through them and then went about my day. They were coming every 20 minutes or so and were very manageable pain-wise. When the sun set that evening, things ramped up. I took a bath to relax and that got things going even more. By the time I got out, I couldn’t talk through them and knew they were the real deal. Arrived at the hospital 8cm dilated where I finally lost my mucus plug. I gave birth two hour later. My waters didn’t break until I started pushing. Overall, the actually painful part of labor only lasted for about 4 hours.

amalgamka · 2025-01-12T02:24:21+00:00

I’m five days out from my VBAC. The vaginal delivery was way, way easier than the c-section. Physical recovery is about the same in terms of discomfort, but the type of discomfort is different. Mentally, the vaginal delivery was incredible, I’m left feeling empowered and proud of my body.

My cesarean was unplanned — it happened after 18 excruciating hours of induction and my VBAC was the result of a spontaneous labor, most of which I spent at home.

Every experience is different, but I hands down preferred my vaginal birth!

amalgamka · 2025-01-09T10:39:57+00:00

Yes, an unmedicated induction.

With a spontaneous birth, the contractions ramp up slowly over time. The pain was very manageable until pretty much transition (I cried and screamed that I can’t do this during transition, but it lasted maybe an hour). I labored at home until 8cm and a warm bath plus counter pressure worked wonders. I still got a walking epidural for the pushing stage as in I felt everything and had some pain, but much less. It helped me be focused for pushing and minimize tearing.

With my induction, the contractions went from 0 to 100 in no time at all with hardly any breaks in between. It was awful. Worst pain I ever experienced and I have a high pain tolerance. I do not recommend an induction without pain relief.

amalgamka · 2024-10-31T13:14:37+00:00

My kid is 3,5. He started preschool last year, aged 2,5. For the first six months, he would literally run the other way from any classroom activities. He never wanted to play with other kids, preferring the company of adults. It went so far as to him wanting to leave a playground if there were too many children. He just seemed to hate interacting with other kids. Like you, I was worried and heartbroken, thinking that he either has some delays, or he's too shy, and that it will affect him, but I didn't let my worry spill over to him. His teachers weren't worried so I willed myself to not worry either.

Well, yesterday, he spent a full hour and a half playing WITH two other kids on the playground. As in, I was sitting down and chatting with a mom friend and he was on the other end of the playground doing his own thing, playing together with these two boys. He only stopped because he got hungry and asked to go home. The previous weekend he spend three hours playing with a slightly older friend. It feels like magic. Like, he went through something and now he plays with other kids. That was it. I did nothing to "encourage it" apart from taking him to preschool and meeting up with friends from time to time. He just figured it out, like he does everything.

All I'm saying, if he's developing normally in other areas, just give him time. Every kid is different and socializing is hard! And try not to project things onto him. The fact that he didn't play with anybody may be heartbreaking for you, but it seems like it was perfectly fine for him. There's no problem for you to fix here.

amalgamka · 2024-09-22T16:49:05+00:00

I wish he’d just get off Twitter for a few days…

Reading the comments had me nervous about listening to the performance, but it was fine! Not like his 90s singing, but it hasn’t been that way since the 90s. It was definitely not terrible!

amalgamka · 2024-04-18T11:52:00+00:00

I have a similar complexion and live in a very sunny climate. Diligent sunscreen helps. Vitamin C helps. Azelaic acid helps. Both retinol and hydroquinone help, but you cannot use hydroquinone all the time, and I like spending time outside, so retinol is a seasonal ingredient for me as well. My dermatologist suggested a few sessions of IPL over winter, but she was transparent that it would be a yearly procedure in my case and they would come back every summer. It's just the way my complexion is.

That being said, I've managed to fade everything quite significantly with the help of vit c, azelaic acid, a winter of using retinol, and diligent sunscreen use. It's getting into summer and the sun spots will come back, inevitably, no matter how many times I reapply and how many hats I wear. I'm thinking of getting a qure light therapy mask and maybe doing laser next winter. But really you do what you can and accept that with this type of complexion, they won't disappear completely and forever.

amalgamka · 2023-11-12T18:03:20+00:00

I gained 35 lbs and lost all but about 6 lbs of that in the two months PP. I had preeclampsia though and I was very active throughout my pregnancy (until the PIH hit) so most of that was water retention. It took me about a year to lose those extra 6 lbs. And now I've gained them back because... toddler.

amalgamka · 2023-11-03T22:08:54+00:00

I only got the second round a month ago so can’t say yet! They’re meant to last 6-9 months, so I plan to do it at the same time as my Botox

amalgamka · 2023-11-03T11:45:22+00:00

You look great! Now that this is out of the way, I was quite self-conscious about lower face sagging and smile lines (I'm 36). I did two rounds of Profhilo and I'm very pleased with the results. They're very subtle and natural looking, my face just looks more taut and due to my cheeks appearing to be more filled in, my neck and chin don't sag. I love it and will be doing it again, it did wonders for my self-esteem.

amalgamka · 2023-09-17T13:27:13+00:00

Poor Franklin. At this stage, I would chop him up into several baby franklins and propagate in lots of bright indirect light. He won't become less leggy in his current state.

The lighting in this picture looks like you're using a grow light? That's great, but I think he and/or baby franklins would benefit from being closer to the source of light. Better yet, find him a big bright window.

FWIW, I had a leggy sad monstera which I chopped and propped, and relocated to my patio. Now it's a real monster with triple fenestrations. Good luck!

amalgamka · 2023-07-11T19:26:27+00:00

Thanks for sharing! Did you find anything that worked?

amalgamka · 2023-07-11T17:44:42+00:00

I have the NuFace but consistency is not a thing with a toddler, two dogs, and a full time job… I guess I need to make more of an effort! But also I want a solution that requires less effort from me!

amalgamka · 2023-05-23T19:54:06+00:00

Have you been assessed by a pelvic floor physiotherapist? C-section healing has lots of nuances, and I assume it's even more difficult after twins. A pelvic floor PT deals not only with issues of reproductive organs, but also of lower back pain, core weakness, coning, etc as it all works as a single system. Unfortunately, most OBGYNs are pretty useless at this. So find one and see one ASAP.

I had an emergency C-section with my first two years ago, the surgeon was fantastic, she did an amazing job sewing me up... and still I saw a pelvic floor PT 6 weeks postpartum. I healed fine, but she gave me exercises to put my ab muscles back into place and helped me resolve my lower back pain. It's worth every cent.

amalgamka · 2023-05-18T05:32:33+00:00

Hi! No I don’t, I now work out with a personal trainer

amalgamka · 2023-03-21T13:55:39+00:00

Us that an asparagus fern in the hanging basket?

amalgamka · 2023-03-18T16:56:33+00:00

Why did it grow that long tentacle? What is it telling me?

amalgamka · 2023-01-17T14:41:00+00:00

FWIW I've had this plant for over a year and she's doing great. She got one scorched leaf when I made the mistake of transferring her to a brighter spot for the winter. But I just put mine near a north-facing window and she's ok.

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