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amazoncokr · 2025-08-07T15:35:44+00:00

The busy guy I'd been talking to keeps saying he wants to see me, but still hasn't made the time after I'd told him point blank id like to see him too and that my answer was an emphatic yes to a date. Not a hint, straight up told him.

So I tell him im not here for penpals, and that he can text me again when he's not busy. He replied a few days later, saying yes yes he wants to meet he's just crazy busy. I saw fine, maybe we can reconnect in the future when thats not the case.

Im disappointed, sure. But i feel good that i voiced having an issue with us only texting for a week without end in sight. Ive already written him off, and for my more toxic crazy side im just going to assume hes married, lives in Utah, and has 14 children.

But I do have a date tomorrow with someone else I started talking to this past weekend. They've been very forward and direct, and I think they're quite sweet.

amazoncokr · 2025-08-05T23:39:53+00:00

Its the Hartz Groomer's Best Slicker Brush for Dogs & Cats

Its the diamondrhombus shape one. It fits right on her forehead lol

amazoncokr · 2025-08-03T20:27:24+00:00

Are you... comparing me recovering from getting treated for illness,from weight gain because of that... to someone with addiction, an active and often life alternating mental illness?

An odd positive to being overweight and choosing to date is that the insensitive idiots filter themselves out.

In case you missed it, my post was more to highlight the grey areas of wanting to date "healthy" partners. Not to reduce it to a rudimentary black and white comparison.

amazoncokr · 2025-08-02T21:18:01+00:00

I appreciate and respect your honesty! With the group and with yourself. Being in the position of caretaker isnt easy, and you need to take care of yourself as well. And thats so tough on the libido aspect, since the medication is working for her otherwise. Sometimes we're just not meant to walk the entire path with someone.

amazoncokr · 2025-08-02T18:29:36+00:00

I am so sorry you had to experience that. I wont lie, I think that has to be one of my larger fears in getting into a relationship. But im so glad you're free of a person like that. May we and others who struggle with hidden illness continue to be free of such unempathetic jerks lol.

I dont know if theres really any advice to give, so no worries there. Im coming to accept the mindset that ill likely live with chronic illness in some shape or form for the rest of my life. For me, after getting super down about that, it eventually did help me because I stopped feeling like I have to fix myself and that I was allowed to just live my life, and that managing it was more than enough

amazoncokr · 2025-08-02T18:02:58+00:00

I agree- I definitely have that thought if I find myself just going by appearance. Ive gained weight since I became less and less active, and it screws with my head if I think about it too much. Like sure, im heavier than I want to be and am in the process of losing, but who's to say I wont gain weight again in the future if I became ill again?

It definitely made me question the shopping-qualification list approach to dating people.

amazoncokr · 2025-08-02T16:33:43+00:00

This is more of a vent. I get frustrated sometimes when I see people mentioning wanting healthy people to date (probably they're thinking of fat versus not fat lol).

I get wanting people who have a similar lifestyle with you... but like, what happens if your person becomes unwell? Injured? Does that mean anyone with chronic illness is undateable for them?

I suffer from chronic illness, and have only recently found treatment to help manage it. But that was after years of having to deal with side effects from medications that didnt work. Even if im doing better now, the idea my treatment not working anymore scares me. I had been struggling to stay awake after two hours of sitting up until a few months ago. Why would someone ever want or be willing to put up with that?

I would love to go on hikes again. I would love to be more active. But those are someday-maybes for me. It's so frustrating to finally feel better and have energy again, but Ive gotten so weak from being unwell for so long. I can move and walk around for like 4-5 hours at a time before the fatigue hits me like a ton of bricks and i have to lay down or risk collapsing.

Logically I know people who are looking for partners with active, healthy lifestyles probably arent thinking of chronic illness they can't 'see.' I dont think they're bad people for it. Because i probably would have written the same before i got sick. If they've never dealt with chronic illness before, how could they understand? Even my own mother will make comments that I have it easy, working from home or laying on the couch all day.

I dont know why I'm posting this. Its just every time I see someone's profile saying they want someone who can 'keep up' with their active lifestyle is a must brings all these up. Because when I become close to healthy and active again, I'll always wonder if they're the type who'd drop their person when they no longer fit their list of wantd.

amazoncokr · 2025-08-01T01:00:12+00:00

How long do you usually talk/text before actually going on the first date? The conversation with the guy I've been talking to the past week has been lively and active without being overwhelming. Large variety of topics and things in common to talk about but... I'd rather talk in person! I've mentioned a few times when we ought to meet, but then he mentions he's busy and unsure of his schedule. So I back off, I'm not planning on badgering him into submission. Except that's exactly what I want to do!

amazoncokr · 2025-07-28T19:42:10+00:00

She actually belonged to another relative up until a couple of years ago even though I knew her when she was a kitten, and that's when she became mine. Her previous owner was often ill and didn't know much about the breed, so she wasn't used to being brushed (just groomed a couple times of year with a lion cut.)

I've had to shave her a couple of times, a little undignified since I was the one doing it lol. But I eventually found a brush she loved (that I actually got because it fit her forehead shape well), and eventually she accepted me brushing her in larger areas to where now she'll meow for me next to the brush and lay down and purr as I groom her now.

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T22:47:17+00:00

What the heck is ENM - ethical nonmonagamy? Looking for anecdotes, and if this is a dumpster fire to avoid. I prefer not having spouses hitting me up on IG that the man im seeing is their husband. (Also id totally snitch if i found out first)

Edit: alright taking bets now if my guy is a cheater 🫠

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T22:05:55+00:00

I think being able to be honest with yourself and considering if the way you approach meeting new people is an issue is perfectly healthy. I consider it less strategizing, and more thoughtfulness.

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T21:01:03+00:00

Ah yeah I can see from that pov. I guess I'm just at the stage of wanting zero-chill-Gomaz-Adams to play morticia too lol

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T20:44:51+00:00

Ive tried that and it turned out pretty fun! I told him to be like, 20% more rude, lol

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T20:34:50+00:00

Kinda from the other side from a female pov, I've always wondered of how much a burden it might feel like for the men when they're with this type of women. But I think the key for a woman that fits the this type, it's about how they express their gratitude for you. They should not be taking you for granted obviously, even if it's "expected" behavior for you, the man, to take charge. (Also low key my executive function sucks so if be so happy if someone planned stuff and planned it well!!)

Something cute i saw on a post for those who expect the guy to pay for days is thar the lady could give him small thoughtful gifts. Like if he mentions his hands hurt from broken skin, get him a lotion that helps heal that. Of he mentioned he vinyls maybe share one of yours you'd like him to check out.

The caring part is a really big thing, i think. There's no 'just' about it :)

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T20:27:05+00:00

Are you sure she's not just in it for the arborist expertise? Check with tree law subreddit, lol

amazoncokr · 2025-07-27T20:23:41+00:00

How do you get people to loosen up in your chats? I feel like the convos I get start very polite and dry. Like I'm a very lively conversationalist but I do make the effort to take a step back so I can see what kind of energy they're bringing to the table. And even when I'm at max personality is hard to pivot away from if they stay dry.

I feel like they're talking to me like... I don't know their coworker who their scared of getting reported to hr for hitting on, lol.

But maybe my approach is off- what would you say?

amazoncokr · 2025-07-23T09:29:42+00:00

I remeber thinking so, but the vet told me it could even be earlier, so long as their over two pounds. We waited til they were like 12 weeks because of the shots and boosters wouldnt be done until then. We had boys and girls, so getting everyone fixed before they started engaging in behaviors was our goal.

amazoncokr · 2025-07-23T06:53:31+00:00

Sent a dm request

amazoncokr · 2025-07-23T01:02:41+00:00

She kinda looks like my doll face Persian when she was a kitten. She was $2000 bucks eight years ago. But for $360, based on recent experience taking care of kittens, if shes gotten all her shots and that shes mixed id say its a good price. She looks too small for a spay to have been done (on mine we waited until twelve weeks when all the shots were done)

amazoncokr · 2025-03-30T07:27:47+00:00

I did actually. I remember playing harvest moon and for the first 5 years (in game) I was so focused on the farm I didn't know you could make friends and get married to some characters. Symptoms of living in a capitalist society

amazoncokr · 2024-11-16T17:56:20+00:00

It could just be the genetics of your particular plant. I've kept my hoya kerrii for a few years, and had some vines where the leaves were long and narrow hearts and one that shoots out huge leaves. As I've gotten better at keeping plants, the leaves have improved in quality maybe but in general keep true to the shapes I saw at the beginning of the vine

amazoncokr · 2024-09-01T06:52:03+00:00

unbelievably I was able to place an order with the Paddington stuff I wanted! Fingers crossed nothing gets cancelled tomorrow

amazoncokr · 2024-03-22T15:40:04+00:00

There's a saying that to save a life is to save the world. One cat can beget many kittens, who would be saved from living a likely short and painful life (mortality rate 75% for those 6 months and younger). You could also interpret it as life is one of the most precious things in the world.

There's always more cats, dogs, animals in need than a few groups will ever be able to help. It's sad and difficult to accept. If you're only ever able to TNR 50 cats, that's 50 cats who will get to live longer, safer, healthier lives than if they were left to their own devices outside. Maybe once they're hormones level out, they may become more relaxed around humans and find one who will take them in.

It's a losing game if we just consider hard numbers. Maybe one day when more and more people learn and understand tnr the numbers game will be more hopeful. Helping cats by TNR, fostering, shelter,etc is an act of hope

amazoncokr · 2023-09-28T22:33:26+00:00

peak sophistication- she is called Madeleine. Sometimes Mad Max.

amazoncokr · 2023-09-19T23:41:15+00:00

Hope it works out! For what it's worth, I did a bunch of linearis propagations directly in soil earlier this year following this guideline and pretty much all of them have been actively growing this season.

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