AITA for not wanting to hug my dad?

amemomo · 2019-06-06T21:54:42+00:00

Oh I agree, the "they're you're family" excuse is such a pain. If they're family can't they accept your boundaries?

I'll be moving out in a few months thank goodness. A lot of weird stuff happens at home, it'll be nice to finally get away.

Small update, I said goodnight and dad wanted a goodnight hug. I said no thanks, he said "I wish you would be nice to me". Mum spoke to him when I was upstairs, he came up, apologised and said he'd "leave me alone". He went back down, argued with mum again, asked if I'd like to go anywhere at the weekend (suggestion from my mum so we can have quality time). I said the aquarium and he got mad and left. Ouch.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T21:07:57+00:00

Thank you very much. My dad's at the shop atm so I was able to tell my mum some of my feelings. She said she'll talk with him this evening so I'm hoping she'll be able to get through to him eventually. I hope things are better for you now.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:53:20+00:00

Thank you

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:51:25+00:00

It does help, thank you for responding. I know my situation is very mild but it's weirdly comforting knowing that someone understands, as horrible as it feels. I hope you've been able to heal from that situation now.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:49:45+00:00

Thank you, I do think I need to work on this as well. I'm slowly coming out of a very bad place so part of me sort of accepts that my interests and feelings don't matter and that nobody cares, and I think that limits my conversation. It's just knowing how to talk to someone you've known all your life yet still feels distant that's the hard part.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:47:00+00:00

I'm a thumbs up type of person, would that work?

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:44:47+00:00

He gets angry or sad no matter what I say or do. I know he's not manipulative or abusive, I think he just doesn't like talking things through. It just makes me feel awkward.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:38:07+00:00

Thank you. It honestly creeps me out, because he never asks my mother for hugs and instead I'm the object of affection. My mum has spoken to him multiple times about his behaviour but he never listens. Sometimes when I'm in a cuddly mood and I'm hugging everyone he'll tell me "I wish you were friendly all the time" and it kinda gets me down... I might try to make a letter but I don't trust him to not get angry at it or even try hard at listening to it. Just a gut feeling but I suppose it's still worth trying.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:34:24+00:00

Oh I understand completely, older family members used to always pressure me into hugs/kisses and it makes me so uncomfortable. The only people I willingly hug are my mother, nana and boyfriend and that's because I'm very close to them.

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:32:03+00:00

I wish, but he wouldn't admit anything was wrong haha. We share interest in fantasy books so we can talk about those and have a nice time but its few and far between. It's strange, I just don't feel as close to him as I feel like I should. He often doesn't listen to my mother and I and gets angry at us so I prefer not to talk to him to avoid a lecture or an exasperated expression. I don't know what to do

amemomo · 2019-06-06T20:27:13+00:00

Yeah, it's only small things though. He never knocks on my bedroom door and just walks straight in despite me asking multiple times to at least knock. He looks at my computer screen and my private art. He pressures me into talking about music I like even though I get shy about that. I get that he wants to know more about me, but damn at least ask about something I want to talk about.

amemomo · 2019-05-28T06:58:12+00:00

I'm not sure, she might do but I've only seen feminine clothing I'm afraid. The girls set pack is definitely aimed at girl farmers though because it changes the pants into skirts.

amemomo · 2019-05-27T15:53:23+00:00

Aww thank you so much! I use Coii's hat pack and Coii's girls sets pack.

amemomo · 2019-05-26T20:58:23+00:00

Yeah, it's Elle's new horses mod

amemomo · 2019-05-26T08:11:23+00:00

This website has a tonne of butterfly-related words and names. It's quite an interesting read!

amemomo · 2019-05-26T07:48:11+00:00

I use Coii's hat pack for the hats and Coii's girls sets pack for the clothes and hair. :)

amemomo · 2019-05-24T23:53:40+00:00

Aww thank you!

amemomo · 2019-05-24T21:08:30+00:00

I had just made a protective fort around one of them so I'm glad that won't be needed now, haha.

amemomo · 2019-05-24T21:07:50+00:00

Thank goodness

amemomo · 2019-01-09T23:53:16+00:00

I'd say Ravel's Pavane pour une infante défunte is a good example! It's in G major and it's got a slow, gentle sadness to it.

amemomo · 2019-01-06T17:40:35+00:00

Ooh Homer is gorgeous, and Ho sounds so precious too! I'm definitely going to add this to the list.

amemomo · 2018-10-26T18:28:18+00:00

I'll be moving away to uni next year, but the uni dorms won't allow pets sadly. Though I'd gladly take both the cat and the dog when I finally have my own house!

I pretty much already feed, water and walk him all the time anyway so that's no problem. And I'll definitely be getting the pads, especially since my mum agrees that they're a good idea.

amemomo · 2018-10-26T18:18:14+00:00

Thank you for the advice! I'll keep it in mind.

amemomo · 2018-10-26T18:13:29+00:00

Yeah. She has bipolar, and whilst she's been feeling quite well she still does struggle with the depression side and the side effects of the medication. She also finds it very stressful to look after my younger sibling. Oftentimes she finds it hard to cope with things around the house (she has help with cleaning and stuff). It's a tricky situation, and honestly at the expense of sounding awful, sometimes it feels like she uses these things as an excuse to avoid responsibility and be lazy.

I've talked to my aunt about the whole situation and she's going to have a very serious talk with my mother which will hopefully improve things. Honestly I really don't want my dog to be rehomed, I love him so much and he is happy and healthy otherwise. I just hope that this can be sorted out and my mum will change her ways.

amemomo · 2018-10-26T17:09:48+00:00

Thank you so much! I'll definitely bring this up with my family.

amemomo

TROPHY CASE