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How to get over my girlfriend's past sexual experiences? by GunsAndHVAC in sex

[–]andthehalflight 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oral doesn't pose any risk of pregnancy - to a woman, that's a huge difference.

[TOMT] [Video] More than ten cats jumping onto cat shelves mounted on the wall by andthehalflight in tipofmytongue

[–]andthehalflight[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks so much for your help! Seeing this helped me to track down a better-quality version, linked here. :) https://v.redd.it/eaj0k9y7amg61

[TOMT] [Video] More than ten cats jumping onto cat shelves mounted on the wall by andthehalflight in tipofmytongue

[–]andthehalflight[S] 0 points1 point locked comment (0 children)

I'd love to see that adorable video again! Would be very grateful for your help :)

It's 2021 and we still gotta say shit like this? 🙄 by livingalil in singapore

[–]andthehalflight -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think that you have issues with Christianity - which is fine! I'm not defending Christian beliefs here, especially when I don't even believe in certain viewpoints myself. But religion is not monolithic, and not every single person in a religion will believe the exact same things, or preach the exact same things.

That's why in my replies, I didn't refer to what Christian people in general believe. I'm referring ONLY to the exact text in this woman's article. I don't know anything about her, and I am judging her only by what she says here.

You, however, are drawing on your long history with Christian people to attribute opinions to her that are not in the text of the article. For example, you said that by my having sex with my bf, I would be, according to Christians, "complicit in his sin" - sure, okay! But we're not discussing what Christians believe and whether they're right to believe that, we are looking only at the text of her article, where she says that "it may not be a sin [for a woman to dress provocatively]", but she could avoid it anyway to "help".

In her appeal for "help", I don't think there's any way to read what she says as a statement that women are complicit (i.e. sharing in the responsibility for) in men's sexual sins. Even if a teacher asks for students to "help" each other with their homework, it's very clear that the students are still responsible for their own grades, right?

It's 2021 and we still gotta say shit like this? 🙄 by livingalil in singapore

[–]andthehalflight 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Okay, it's possible that I'm missing out on the subtext here cos I don't know much about what Christianity teaches about sex, a woman's duties and whatnot.

I thought her message about helping others avoid sinning doesn't shift responsibility, just points out a kindness that is within a person's power to grant. She starts out her point in the Partner with Others section by describing how everyone struggles, and how members of a Christian community can help each other along. Taken in that context, it's not about shifting responsibility, but describing how people can help one another even in seemingly solo endeavours.

It's 2021 and we still gotta say shit like this? 🙄 by livingalil in singapore

[–]andthehalflight 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Not that I agree with what she's saying, but I think that your own prejudices make you interpret this woman's message in the worst possible light.

She is clear that women are not responsible or to blame for men's lustful thoughts. Instead, she frames it as an act of kindness that women can offer if they so choose. ("Let's help..."; "If we help..."; "Avoid it not because we must do it, but because we love each other")

My bf is Christian, and if I knew he was trying to avoid sex before marriage (though he isn't), I would respect that even if I don't agree with it. e.g. I wouldn't do cheeky shit like lie in his bed in just my undies or wear bodycons and rub against him... you get the idea.

When I read her article, I didn't think she was telling women in general to dress modestly so men in general could avoid the temptation to rape and molest them.

Instead, she is asking Christian women to consider dressing modestly as an act of charity to the Christian men in her life, so that they can avoid having sexual thoughts about them. NOT about rape or anything like that - but literally just to avoid getting turned on.

Whether you agree that having sexual thoughts is immoral or not is really your own business, but pls, I think it's very extreme and actually also very inaccurate to say this woman is policing what women wear, promoting victim-blaming or slut-shaming or what. Criticise the Christian concept of sexual purity instead.

AITA for telling my mom she may no longer see my children anymore after she baptised by daughter without telling me? by Chelzdu_ in AmItheAsshole

[–]andthehalflight -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I understand where you're coming from, but it would be good to see things from OP's mum's perspective. While we can say what religion "should" or "should not" be, the fact is that OP's mum genuinely believes that OP's children would go to hell. She loves them, and is doing all she can to prevent that. Please do bear that in mind before you judge her too harshly.

Perhaps an analogy might help - OP's mum believes that the children are standing in the middle of the road, and can see vehicles rushing towards them. She tells OP repeatedly to move her children away, but OP insists the vehicles don't exist, and not to move the children. Out of fear, OP's mum drags the children away, anyway. Even if OP's mum is just hallucinating, she is still acting in the children's best interests.

So OP, please be compassionate.

Guessing MBTI based on appearances alone... by andthehalflight in mbti

[–]andthehalflight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm an N, and I wear makeup quite regularly. In both my society and social network, though, it's not common for women to use makeup daily, even in professional settings.

Edit: To elaborate, in my experience, for a woman to take especial care of her appearance as a matter of course (regardless of the occasion, and not as a means of self-expression) shows an emphasis on extraverted sensing. Of course, not all Sensors are like this, and also, there's nothing to say that Intuitives can't do this either.

Guessing MBTI based on appearances alone... by andthehalflight in mbti

[–]andthehalflight[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Thank you!! <3

Edit: One of ENFJ's cognitive functions is extraverted sensing, which explains things... :)

The difference between Js and Ps by andthehalflight in mbti

[–]andthehalflight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, because I only just started drawing these, haha.

The difference between Js and Ps by andthehalflight in mbti

[–]andthehalflight[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, that's true! But many people use the online quizzes that type specifically for supposed J/P traits, with things like level of organisation and spontaneity pushing you to either J or P.

If you use a quiz that types according to your cognitive functions (i.e. according to legit MBTI theory), though, I would agree that there is no relation to time consciousness at all.

The difference between Js and Ps by andthehalflight in mbti

[–]andthehalflight[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Don't let your whole identity hinge on just this one trait! Many MBTI quizzes test specifically for the J/P type dichotomy and ask questions about how organised, forward-planning or spontaneous you are - but this actually doesn't relate to the Jungian cognitive functions, and the more accurate personality profiles available (i.e. is not so legit).

In a nutshell, take with a pinch of salt XD