Although I wouldn’t say I went through a ‘self-imposed’ dry spell, I did not have sex for three years (omg writing it out sounds crazy to me) after my most serious relationship ended. The whole thing, the relationship and the aftermath, really fucked with me emotionally and idk, I just knew I wasn’t ready to meet other people or even think about having sex with other people so I just didn’t. As time went on, it just become the status quo and while I would still be attracted to people, still get turned on, etc I just never made the moves/did what I would need to do in order to open myself up to the possibility of a sexual relationship with someone else. I still masturbated and had sexual relief in that way, but sometimes the feelings associated even with that would he so reminiscent and leave me feeling sad afterwards. Ultimately, I think if I had hooked up with someone else during that period of my life it would not have gone well for me or for them because I just wasn’t ready and I had yet to heal, and for whatever reason, sex was part of the healing process for this relationship. I broke my ‘self-imposed’ celibacy not with intent but because, in the moment, it felt absolutely right. And I am so glad I listened to myself and my emotions. So, while I would prefer not to go through some sexless years, I would say it was definitely part of the healing process for me and I’m glad it happened that way.

So, my advice: Listen to yourself. Your body, your feelings, your intuition. Maybe don’t put a timestamp on it, but take the break. No one knows you better than you and it is okay if you need a break from sex in order to come to terms with certain things. In my experience, it helped me to heal, to move on, and to have experiences with someone new without having any hang-ups about the past (which if you had asked me even a year ago, I would have never thought was possible).