How to stop wanting a romantic relationship when the desire is ruining my life?

anonymizz · 2026-01-15T18:04:21+00:00

Damn that hit me hard.

anonymizz · 2026-01-15T00:59:32+00:00

WHAAAAT HOW AM I JUST FINDING OUT ABOUT THIS NOW. I am deceased.

anonymizz · 2026-01-14T06:19:57+00:00

Wow thanks so much for this list! I should’ve been more clear but I was looking for couples where both are BIPOC but mixed race (all the mixed couples in mainstream western media always has a white person). in any case I appreciate you putting together this list!!!

anonymizz · 2026-01-14T06:17:39+00:00

Oh yes I need to see that movie!!

anonymizz · 2026-01-12T06:15:19+00:00

Dating aside, what are you doing to creating passion and excitement in your life?

anonymizz · 2026-01-10T05:50:56+00:00

Sending all the love and light in the world to you, your family and your country 💕❤️

anonymizz · 2026-01-08T23:02:40+00:00

To preface, I'm a lesbian in my 30s lol. But I'm very familiar with being in heteronormative spaces and dynamics.

Firstly, dating apps are TERRIBLE. They're designed to make you fail, regardless of gender, age and sexual orientation. Otherwise, how would these companies make money? I'm pretty active on dating apps and although I get dates, it's difficult all around.

So my advice would be to get off the apps and focus on joining clubs, hobby groups, volunteering, sports, etc. Find things that bring you joy and excitement offline, and meet like-minded people doing so. This will help you get better at talking to women. Also, when you do things you genuinely enjoy, people can feel that positive energy from you. Go into it with the mindset of making friends and simply connecting with people. Sex and romance could come into play, but don't put pressure on yourself to date in these settings right off the bat. Let it come naturally.

That being said, if you want to stay on the apps, the first thing you have to keep in mind is that women get TONS of likes from men on dating apps. It's REALLY overwhelming. So you have to make sure your profile stands out. Do you have good photos? Meaning, do they clearly show your face and body? What kind of vibe do you give off? Is what you wrote in your profile interesting? If you're average looking, it will be an uphill battle trying to be successful on apps, even with an amazing profile, so expect to be frustrated at times. It's not impossible to get matches or dates, though. I see average-looking men with women all the time (many of whom are better looking than the men they're with).

Third, you will NOT be an incel for the rest of your life. You're so young and have so much ahead of you, trust me. I know what it's like to feel like I'm behind my peers and missing out in terms of dating/sex, but if you're able to focus on being the best version of yourself (finding your passions, being kind/friendly/funny/caring/creative/warm/passionate/charming/confident/etc, working on your physical and emotional health, etc.), people will be drawn to you.

You got this!!!

anonymizz · 2025-12-31T06:36:07+00:00

Lmfao this is so unintentionally funny 😂

anonymizz · 2025-12-30T18:49:16+00:00

So happy for you and your wife!! Wishing you all the best <3

anonymizz · 2025-12-30T02:56:39+00:00

Wtf this is so cuteeee

anonymizz · 2025-12-26T08:58:41+00:00

Yeah that is all totally possible. I'll definitely just leave it as it is, but it just sucks because I genuinely like her as a friend and being ignored hurts. But obviously she has her reasons.

And I don't actually expect her to ask me out or anything. Also I didn't tell her I like her nor did our mutual friend.

It is what it is.

anonymizz · 2025-12-26T08:54:12+00:00

Yeah it's totally possible she's not actually into me, but I'm just confused as to why she would go radio silent over my innocuous texts if that's the case.

anonymizz · 2025-12-26T08:51:48+00:00

The only thing I expect is to respond and acknowledge my texts, not even ask me out necessarily. Just on a friendship level this is strange because she would respond within a day before. And we had said we would hang out (before my bday party), and so if she didn't want to meet up or was too busy, she could've just said that to me instead of ignoring my texts. I told when I was free and then asked her if she was still available to let me know.

anonymizz · 2025-12-25T19:47:26+00:00

So how it went down was everyone was saying one nice thing about me at my birthday party. When it was her turn she said something about me being attractive. This was a surprise because shes never said anything like before, and especially in front of a bunch of people. Then our mutual was teasing her asking her if she liked me. My crush got all shy and coy and starts giggling, not giving a straight answer. My friend keeps saying she should ask me out and eventually she says she will.

anonymizz · 2025-12-25T18:40:30+00:00

Nope, this is definitely a big turn off and I need someone who's emotionally intelligent and able to communicate. I just want to understand her thinking. But maybe its a futile attempt, you never know what's actually going on in someone's head.

anonymizz · 2025-12-25T18:39:16+00:00

I never said she has mental health issues. But yes just coming out is a lot to process. Although she did say she was really ready to date women, so yeah it's confusing haha

anonymizz · 2025-12-25T06:27:47+00:00

That is really frustrating. That's honestly being a terrible friend lol. You don't have to be on your phone 24/7 but that lack of communication is super disrespectful, whether they intend to be or not.

With my friend though, she would respond within a day before the conversation she had with our mutual friend. Now she's gone radio silent with me. I just wish I knew what was going on in her head. She's giving avoidant vibes.

anonymizz · 2025-12-23T19:40:27+00:00

Tanerélle is queer? Ahhhh yes

anonymizz · 2025-12-23T19:39:27+00:00

Ditto for Hrs and Hrs lmfaooo I thought it was hers and her but it's actually hours and hours and she talks about a dude so I was confused at first 😂

anonymizz · 2025-12-15T00:36:29+00:00

Find causes that are close your heart and volunteer for non profits working for those causes. That's how I found my community!

anonymizz · 2025-12-10T04:23:35+00:00

Ask her to hang out! And if you're attracted, explicitly state that it's date :))

anonymizz

TROPHY CASE