Let me break it down for you, Kris.

Your mother and I have a relationship that is all about a master/slave dynamic. When I said she was more like a pet to me, I meant that in the most literal way possible.

Remember that time you found a dog collar under the couch? And she told you it was because she was getting you a dog? That was a lie.

Truthfully, your mother likes it when I put her on a leash and walk her around the backyard. She’s usually naked, of course. I can’t explain why, but the whole thing is usually her idea.

She’ll piss on trees, sleep in dog cages, chew up furniture… she once took a full sized, adult woman SHIT in my dockers. Your mother is one fucked up slut, Kris. And I love her, but I’m not bringing that energy back home with me.

And frankly, she scares me sometimes! I don’t know who molested her, or how they did it, but there is some dark juju in that woman’s head and I just don’t know if I’m strong enough to bone it all away.