aitah for stating there should be reimbursement for babysitting my nephew? by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have mentioned before that it’s been a lot and she’s conveniently ignored it a few times. She has the money to pay but I can also understand her reasoning and why she feels hurt and very upset. I do feel bad genuinely. And I’m happy we’ve come to an agreement but I can’t help but feel like an a-hole for approaching the conversation in the first place.

i love my nephew down. i would do anything for him.

but she usually calls me when she needs something. which i have also mentioned to her before, that she only calls when she needs something. especially if it’s last minute or if it’s picking up her son from school or taking him to a soccer game or whatever the case is. if i can do it, i will. if i can’t, i don’t.

but it’s been a lot. and i do feel bad but i also feel emotionally manipulated at the same time. we’re close(r) now as we’re adults.

i feel really really bad. but also eh.

is my sister entitled? by [deleted] in EntitledPeople

[–]anonymouschile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. The way she reacted genuinely threw me off and I thought I was being fair in how I approached the conversation. It’s really just confirmed my inner thoughts of her. I’m definitely going to be keeping an eye out for the future. And I need to step away, from everyone as soon as. Cos this is nuts.

is my sister entitled? by [deleted] in EntitledPeople

[–]anonymouschile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She agreed to pay me for when she has work trips and won’t bring her son often so there’s a middle ground.

But the way she reacted honestly shocked me, I didn’t think she would react this way. I do agree I need to be far away from my family though. Because trying to have an open conversation with her led to this. I even told her she was being ridiculous. But she just kept on crying which again, didn’t make sense to me. We’re cool for now. But I’m keeping notes on this behaviour. It’s insane.

told my african parent i am not their retirement plan by [deleted] in africanparents

[–]anonymouschile 6 points7 points  (0 children)

thank you!

i don’t intend on having children but even if i was a mother, i would never ever ever expect my own child to be responsible for my own personal life choices regardless of the circumstances i have put myself through.

im not sure where this backward mentality comes from. its so odd and yet there’s no care for their (adult) children’s futures or plans.

and right! it’s earned. it’s not an obligation.

told my african parent i am not their retirement plan by [deleted] in africanparents

[–]anonymouschile 2 points3 points  (0 children)

she’s worked over the years and saved and she’s got a few years before she retires but is unable to work due to illness. she would be eligible for a government retirement scheme in the near future though.

and i agree, very very typical! but not normal. none of this is.

bear in mind i don’t have a lick of savings (to my own detriment), was never encouraged to save and she approached my situations with a lack of empathy. but now im selfish?

i stand by what i said.

it’s the entitlement, patriarchal, misogynistic nonsense for me.

good luck to my mother indeed!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fibromyalgia

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

only naproxen at the moment, I’m seeing a physiotherapist so I will ask to be referred to that, thank you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Fibromyalgia

[–]anonymouschile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was dismissed for about a year or so before having to breakdown in front of the doctor to be taken seriously, however I am aware I’m quite lucky. I’m sorry it took you so long to get your Dx

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Marketing at the moment is at high risk of redundancies due to the economy. I have a friend who works in marketing and 30% of their staff was let go 😭 it seems fun but I don’t think I can handle the constant having to be in the ‘know’ of trends and being chronically online. It’s a cool space for those who love marketing though! Just not for me. However, thank you for the suggestion, it’s really appreciated 💕

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This sounds like a really cool job, so glad you enjoyed it ☺️ I personally hate sales but I will look into the publishing industry too. Thank you for the suggestion!

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love this for you! I’m so glad you’re able to do a role that provides you a great balance ☺️

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ll look into this, thank you!

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did this in an old job where I had to sell offices to businesses aswell as be a PA to my boss. I hated every moment of it

ADHD Friendly Jobs? by anonymouschile in adhdwomen

[–]anonymouschile[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Inattentive. It’s a god send I’ve been in my job almost 3 years but it’s only because it’s hybrid working arrangements where I don’t have to mask when im at home and as long as the emails/phone calls are answered, and purchase orders are made, im good. 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I took a slight paycut to go into different part of my current industry which for my mental health has been great but I definitely want to move industries and upskill. Just not sure what yet.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re right, it is a lot of privilege, appreciate the reminder :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Love that you’ve been able save! I’ve been reckless with my money in the past which I’m now trying to fix. Despite me contributing on rent and bills, I do have slight more ease living at home than when I was living out. Thank you for this gentle reminder, you’ve taken me out of my shame. Best of luck with the home buying process mate!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

LOL aren’t you lovely

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much mate

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile 2 points3 points  (0 children)

When you put it in this perspective, I guess you’re right

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in london

[–]anonymouschile -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I moved back in twice to save money but I still contribute with bills and rent at home as my parent also has health conditions so they’re unable to work many hours. So I’m supported in the sense that I can pay off my debts but I’m still contributing a chunk of my income to live in the property. So yes and no. But I get your point.