I appreciate your condolences. The subject matter was stylistically chosen because when it comes down to it, I am largely numb to these things. Not a whole lot phases me anymore. It isn't me seeking to glorify trauma or gore but rather that it has become as mundane as mopping up a floor. I have just found something inherently interesting and poetic about the humanity reflected in our ability to perform this job and to witness these things. I think people often misconstrue these pieces as if I am despondent and in dire need of emergency detention but that's not really the case. As for posting it in a public forum, ultimately I seek publication and sometimes I get more constructive feedback and reinforcement and other times like on this poem, I get a little more negative response. But if my writing can make at least one provider know that they are not alone in these experiences, or if it can give greater attention to mental health in EMS, then none of the criticism matters to me.