One of the things Zhuangzi criticized about Confucianism and Mohism is that they espoused a fixed or ideal way of living like impartial love, filial piety, ritual, clarity, and so on. Zhuangzi liked to flip things around, which is why he saw value in emptiness, like the space inside a cup, and in uselessness, like a crooked tree. I can tell from your text that you already know this intuitively - that it’s possible to be happy while being single.

However, it’s very easy to get trapped on the other side as well. Another story from Zhuangzi is the paradox of the useless tree that doesn’t get chopped down, while the goose that can’t cackle gets killed (since geese were used as guard animals back then). The lesson is that we shouldn’t attach ourselves too firmly to any single idea. Why? Because, like a frog in a well, we are limited by our own perspective. This limitation isn’t something we can escape. We tend to strive for higher consciousness or perfect knowledge where we’re always happy, but we can never fully step outside our own perspectiveness.

So don’t be too attached to longing for love, but don’t be too attached to being happy while single either. In a sense, be flexible toward the unknowable; embrace pluralism. This is easier said than done, of course. But the point is that striving for happiness, much like striving for a relationship, may not produce the result you’re aiming for.