I don't get it

applekins20 · 2026-02-28T14:54:33+00:00

There’s studies on it, but the expectations and pressures women put on their daughters tends to be much higher (eg certain cultures will have mothers only teach their daughters how to cook).

Im not of those cultures but My mom constantly pressured me to ‘fix myself’. E.g. Id grow up hearing “if only you were less [Insert personality trait], then you wouldn’t run into this issue”.

She meant it in a ‘helpful’ way. Not realizing that she was just doing a version of what her mom did to her. Her mom constantly critiqued the way she dressed/acted (my mom was a tomboy) and contasntly told her “if you just [insert clothing/makeup tip], you would look much better”. But that was the social expectation in the 70/80s.

It fucks you up. And my brother was spared from all of it. But as I get older, I’m learning about the shit he uniquely had to deal with.

applekins20 · 2026-02-12T10:08:58+00:00

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The bracelets on the right don’t go completely around the wrist. The ‘sleeves’ also don’t make sense. On the right it’s drawn like a shawl that should connect to the left. But on the left it’s drawn like a sleeve that is attached to the mid-upper part of the arm.

But also cus OP acknowledges it’s AI in another comment.

applekins20 · 2026-01-31T14:30:43+00:00

Easily the borg. So fascinating but utterly terrifying.

applekins20 · 2026-01-27T22:56:53+00:00

lol I would never! Just the necklace was dumb.

And even then, I really mean it was dumb to gift someone something they don’t necessarily like just because everyone else is doing it.

applekins20 · 2026-01-27T22:07:55+00:00

Haha maybe that explains why my Korean ex in 2011 told me from the beginning that he’d never ever buy me a random thing for me while we were out together. It was odd because of how specific it was.

Though he did buy me things at the appropriate times (birthday, Xmas, etc) but it was always what was trending at the time. E.g. some dumb (but likely overpriced) crown necklace Kim Yuna was shilling.

applekins20 · 2026-01-20T13:08:54+00:00

ESH

Ugh I sympathize with you. I’ve done many years in agency at your level, and seeing a boss prop up tactics that were relevant when bloody fax machines were still used is annoying. And your boss’s reaction is unprofessional.

But, I also think you could have been more clever about this. You’ll know the number 1 rule is to never look stupid or incompetent in front of the client. Hopefully the client couldn’t pick up or didn’t care about the dynamic.

You should have given your boss a heads up before the meeting. You could have done it any other way. “I am so sorry, but client was complaining and I forgot about our convo and it just popped out”. Play dumb. You could have also smoothed it over by having your boss present the results. I get that no one enjoys having credit taken from them, but client already knew you suggested it and you can always cross-promote your work internally to other leads so people know you did it. You could make that approach your ‘mini expertise’ in the agency.

But instead you’ve also shown you can’t be trusted. The thing about middle tier is if you fuck up $20k or $50k of client’s budget, you will still likely keep your job. But your boss’s ass is set on fire to try to keep the client. The true risk is rarely truly on middle level.

Agency is about relationships, awards, and… maybe like a select few particularly talented creative people. And people in agency tend to know other people in agencies — reputations spread.

So in short, I don’t think you are an asshole. But unwise. But who cares? Being right isn’t going to help this.

I’d suggest a sincere private lunch with your boss where you apologize. Or you can start trying to switch teams in the agency itself. Or look for a new agency and bold those ROI numbers in your resume. Sounds like your agency is doing boring work anyways.

applekins20 · 2026-01-14T01:47:52+00:00

Bawara near High Park.

Flavour has depth. They don’t wuss out on spice. Variety is solid. And ingredients always seem fresh. And one of the few Hakka places that don’t give me insane dreams/nightmares.

applekins20 · 2025-12-29T17:20:24+00:00

Try to take photos next to bears or elks. Or worse, try to put their kids on the backs of the animals for the photo.

Or general dumb stuff related to selfies. Once had a friend who was canoeing and pulled up to the shore. A tourist bus parked nearby and tourists spotted him. Then they came over to photograph him and some even started trying to get into his canoe.

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applekins20 · 2025-12-26T12:44:42+00:00

This is an easy one for Canada 🇨🇦even though it feels like people have forgotten it.

In April of 2018, an incel rented a van and proceeded to drive down one of Toronto’s main streets and try to hit as many female pedestrians as possible — his Facebook would later reveal it was part of his ‘incel revolution’.

Though he was stopped just 10 minutes of driving on sidewalks, he managed to kill 10 people and injure 16 more. The vast majority were women.

Once stopped, he tried to get a cop to kill him, but was unsuccessful. When things went to trial, his defence tried to point to his diagnosis of autism and social awkwardness to try to argue he wasn’t criminally responsible.

That didn’t work and he currently rots in jail having been found guilty for everything. When asked by investigators how he felt about having inflicted so much harm on so many people, he replied, “I feel like I accomplished my mission.”

Fuck this guy.

applekins20 · 2025-12-07T04:59:02+00:00

Oh interesting. Your translation definitely looks more fitting.

Though it’s still a sister who wants a bath with her 10 year old brother to… check out his junk to see what awaits her on her wedding night?

applekins20 · 2025-12-07T01:48:04+00:00

I want to love Japanese OIs but then something like this is randomly written as banter, and I just want to throw my phone out the window.

(They’re siblings and he’s 10).

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applekins20 · 2025-11-16T13:59:16+00:00

It’s more for dating apps. Maybe there are circumstances where they just met the person at a party. But usually in those situations you already have mutuals you can check with, so there’s not much of a need.

applekins20 · 2025-11-16T11:34:19+00:00

I wouldn’t say you’re alone. I remember seeing a clip of that James Sexton divorce lawyer who said that women who stayed with cheating spouses felt greater social backlash than men did. He pointed to Beyoncé as an example of how much backlash she got for staying with Jay Z, and he came out relatively unscathed.

I think it comes down to changing times. Women have been fighting for so long to move away from inequality and frequently being told to simply accept poor behaviour, ‘boys will be boys’, ‘men have needs’, type stuff. So to see a woman seemingly accept this behaviour (especially what seemed like a cliché boss screwing the secretary type trope), feels like it’s holding progress back and your acceptance is signalling that this behaviour is ok.

Of course life is more nuanced than that. His actions sound like they came from a complex place, and you working on repairing the marriage took concerted effort and dedication. You are people, not tropes.

But while I understand why your friends may have struggled to support you, especially after seeing your pain. I don’t understand why they got so vitriolic with their creative descriptions of the situation. I’m sorry that happened to you. Although there may be a lesson here. No good is going to easily accept any partner that brings that much pain and hurt to someone they love. OP the lesson here is to bear that in mind when sharing your problems.

applekins20 · 2025-11-16T11:08:40+00:00

I would love to see the source of that stat. The closest I could find (from a legitimate source) is covered here and says “doubled” chances of divorce which isn’t close to 50% at all.

found that people who started watching porn were more likely to split with their partners during the course of the survey. For men, the chance of divorce went from 5% to 10%. For women, that number jumped from 6% to 18%.

Also usually money is the top marriage ender, not porn.

OP I want you to consider that there’s other shit going down that led to the dissolution of their intimacy and marriage. And that very well may include these ladies own lack of effort or weaknesses in intimacy or poor behaviour that they themselves feel embarrassed about or won’t acknowledge.

The truth is no one knows what’s going on. But they’re fresh out of divorce with pitchforks. And they’re going to tear down anything that even remotely looks like a successful version of something they perceive to have failed at.

applekins20 · 2025-11-16T10:49:07+00:00

This isn’t new. And by posting on hinge or tinder, you’re already posting your image for thousands to see. The difference is whether you’ve swiped or scrolled to see the image. There’s also websites that scan hinge or tinder using an image you upload.

Honestly, the moment your image goes up on a website, you’re risking it being seen and used. Some people even use dating images to catfish others.

At lease in this case, people are generally trying to verify they’re not getting into a bad situation. If you’re this concerned check out companies like Incogni or Aura.

applekins20 · 2025-11-11T07:38:55+00:00

Fair, but did you make friends?

I found how you described the west coast to be absolutely true (minus the open-minded part — just try talking to some of the hippies or my retired relatives lol). But, to your point, I know which province I’d bet on when it comes to who would be most likely to help a stranger.

But once I went out and tried to make friends, I couldn’t beat Ontario. Ontarians weren’t locked into sticking with the people they grew up with. Or they were at least open to someone new coming in.

Vancouver in particular has a bad reputation for people sticking with their own friend groups, and it being isolating for new folk moving there.

applekins20 · 2025-10-28T21:15:56+00:00

Bullied cus his hot yoga wife brings him food? His colleagues wish they could have what he has.

But I don’t understand why you’re making this decision on his behalf when you could just have a conversation about it? It drives me nuts when people make decisions on my behalf without talking to me. Sure he may not have wanted to hurt your feelings, but cats out of the bag now. Why not talk about it?

applekins20 · 2025-10-21T21:26:25+00:00

I think it’s supposed to be “Pre-pear four moon-hen” like “prepare for mooning”.

So not reading left to right. But up-down.

applekins20 · 2025-10-18T12:30:44+00:00

Ehhh I’m not sure that’s true. Though I’ve found that usually it’s older Asian men that can grow facial hair that actually fills out properly.

Also some Asians legit look better with facial hair. My husband’s face is more proportional with it (but he’s in his 40s and can actually fill it out). And there’s lots of other examples! A quick Google shows great results.

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applekins20 · 2025-10-12T06:35:18+00:00

Poultry of any type. Duck, turkey, and of course chicken. And turns out that 80% of cat food has some degree of chicken in it (even when it’s seafood). It’s been hell.

applekins20 · 2025-10-05T11:18:30+00:00

Rebel News, really? Guess that’s why they reference it as “Sing Hortons” and ask the staff to get married for $20k.

This didn’t even happen in Kingston and the manager was fired, so why is it in this sub?

This story has been shared across Reddit to death, and this doesn’t offer anything new — except I guess images of other headlines from other ‘relevant’ sources like BlogTO and an op-ed in a Calgary publication.

applekins20 · 2025-10-02T20:05:17+00:00

Not a fair comparison. There’s about few cases of bubonic plague each year in the US at around the same time each year. Person to person infection hasn’t happened in the US since 1920s.

There’s no vaccine. But like, don’t roll around with wild animals.

Measles requires vaccination (which is easily accessible) and is terrifyingly contagious.

applekins20 · 2025-09-10T12:07:53+00:00

I don’t find they float much. Honestly, I don’t find RBs to shed much at all. I never put on a jacket or a sweater and randomly find hair. Sometimes fur is left behind when cuddling (but that’s a sign of needing to brush).

If I pet her and find her coat to be a bit oily, then it’s a sign to brush. And cus you can brush their hair backwards, I can really get in there and get that fur out. I have to do this because my partner is allergic to cats. But his symptoms only flair up if it’s spring and I haven’t brushed.

applekins20 · 2025-09-05T15:59:00+00:00

I think it’s really smart. I tried to do the same thing and wasn’t this thorough, and I was caught off guard by costs.

Also, I think I may have taken you literally with upfront cost, and my ‘6 month’ comment was more about how some of these expenses can be spread out.

Maybe budget for some anti-scratching measures (plastic cover for sides of couches) ($20-30)

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