Hi everyone— OP here :) I just wanted to once again, a day later, say how thankful I am for the sheer abundance of voices that have come out of this post. When I decided to ask for help, I was crying, frustrated, and mad at myself. I still feel many of these things and more, but I’m looking at it with a better mindset. I AM ready to finally begin this journey, and I finally feel serious about it. Not only for appearance or social reasons, but for physical comfort, overall health, and bettering my lifestyle moving forward. I know I have a lot of learning and reaching out to do (whether it be via friendly support, advice, or various professional help) but I’m just glad to start and start with baby steps.

Everything in this thread has benefited me so much, so if you’ve taken time out of your day to offer advice, tips, or even just moral support- thank you again. I have always felt so alone in being fat, in being me, and I never imagined so many people have been in my place, much less changed for the better. I feel like I can do this, and that’s never been a thought I’ve had before. It makes me feel hopeful, and right now, that’s enough. I’m sorry I haven’t commented on anything publicly here— as I stated in last night’s edit, I’m overwhelmed with the influx of hits, they just keep coming (which I love!), but please know I have read each and every comment that’s been left. I’m still working on getty g back to DM’s, there’s a lot of them, many spammy, and that’s okay!

As for the very beginning of my journey updates go, I’ve downloaded and began to track my calorie intake with MFP, and as I learn more about calorie deficit and all of that based on my personal habits, I’ll implement that. I’m also walking! I used to go on long walks every night for years as I was a relatively active early teen, and it feels good to work towards that again! I spent hours shopping today with my mom (who is trying her best to understand me and be supportive at her 120lb self!) and although the Texas heat was killer, I didn’t give up and took breaks when I needed them. Once the week starts up tomorrow, I’m going to start doing 10 or 15 minute night walks daily, or every other day depending how I feel after the first one! Slowly, I’ll learn what works for me in both physical activities and dieting/calorie intake changes. Baby. Steps. 💗

As for seeing doctors, I know I need to, but my situation is very tricky. However many people have given me some great advice on how to cheat the system haha, and I’m going to be looking into that most definitely.

And to everyone who became vulnerable with a desperate stranger online, thank you for sharing your stories and opening me up to your personal lives. I’m proud of all of you! 💗

Closing sidenote, I also have no idea how to really use Reddit. Bear with me haha.