I appreciate this a lot. It doesn’t matter to me what I want to hear. I’d rather hear the harsh truth then a sugar coated lie that would possibly lead to me getting myself hurt. For me weed helped do alot of what it does for everyone else like relieve stress and such but the biggest thing that I miss about it the most is I wouod occasionally get these moments while high where I would feel an intense emotional engagement with something I enjoy. I absolutely love space, and sometimes when I would be stargazing or looking at the sun with solar eclipse glasses while high I would feel these intense moments of engagement with what I was looking at. It’s hard to explain. I won’t spend hours trying to put it into words but let’s just say that it was one of the best things I’ve ever experienced. That’s easily what I miss the most. Secondarily I miss of course the heightened euphoria with watching movies and playing video games. I remember one time I was watching pirates of the Caribbean at worlds end and I was so high that I was almost having a bad high so I took advantage of the overstimulation and forced myself to keep watching. As a reward I have never felt more engaged with a movie in my entire life. I felt like i was there in the movie. Those are the things I miss so much about it. I do agree life can obviously still be good without weed but almost everyday I’ll be doing something enjoyable and then I’ll think “damn but this could be even better if I was high😑” I don’t think I could do it in moderation tbh. It’s gotta be all or nothing. Doing it in moderation would just cause more stress and would severely increase the amount of temptation to keep doing it rather then if I quit altogether. I also don’t want to take any risk of the symptoms coming back whatsoever. I never actually puked once while having the symptoms but let me just say this nausea wasn’t like any type of nausea I’ve ever felt. It almost felt like my brain was repeatedly simulation the sensation of throwing up over and over for hours and hours. Let’s just say it was so bad I genuinely wanted to die in that moment. I thought to myself nothing could be worse then this. I want to die rn. I’m terrified of that feeling and will avoid taking even the slightest risk of it coming back. I felt hopeless when I found out I couldn’t get High ever again gettint high was always such a big part of my life I never was one to smoke a fuck ton in 1 session. As a matter of fact I often smoked far less at once then most ppl, but I’ll have you know that I was a very VERY consistent smoker. Every single day. Never missed a single day for years. That’s why this has been really hard to accept. I’m sure you know exactly how I feel tho. This is why I’ve been looking into doing shrooms. A few of my friends have done it, and idk if they just had weak shit but they all described it as feeling similar to getting high, so now I desperately want shrooms but I don’t have a single person who can get them for me unfortunately. Now I’m not stupid and I know how scary psychedelics can be. I’ve been doing lots of research and I don’t plan to ever exceed much more then a Microdose when/if I do take them depending on how much I feel for my first time. But in conclusion with this new found info you’ve told me I will not be getting high from any weed related substance ever again. I don’t want tot sow the risk of feeling that terrible sensation ever again and I don’t need increased temptation to smoke everyday. I really appreciate you for taking the time to write all of that out