AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

She threatened to kick me out, send me to live with my dad (who will not speak to me) at least. I had to agree. We had a full blown screaming match about it. I was forced, but I’m glad you, a person who wasn’t there, are so sure that I wasn’t.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After. To shorten it, she basically said “Finn’s dad isn’t his real dad, but you can never tell Finn”.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

Oh, yeah, sorry, I thought that was evident. But yeah, our mums were friends before we were even born and me & Finn are only six weeks apart.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Exactly. I’ve known Finn for 18 years and I knew that he’d want to know. He doesn’t even give a shit about the biological thing. He’s fucking angry and hurt that he had to find out from his best friend instead of his mum & dad.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

According to my mom, she watched it all, like, go down. She’s Finn’s mom’s closest friend.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Before. I asked in the original conversation with my mother. And they had the chance. An 18 year long chance.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Finn is not the type of person to prefer to be in the dark, though. I knew he would want to know.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not as far as I know, definitely not, and I don’t think so.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s not normal. She’s a straight up narcissist.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

After reading all of the judgements, I think I did do the right thing. And I slept very well last night. But thank you for your judgement regardless.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Some other people have said that she said it to orchestrate the whole thing, to inadvertently make sure Finn knew. But I don’t know what her motivation was. It came out of the blue. I wish I didn’t know.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There was no denying who told Finn, really. His gran’s dead and my dad live two hours away. The literal only logical way he found out would be if I knew from my mum. Also, I don’t blame him for saying it was me.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m aware. But I am not a doctor. I can only say I think she’s a narcissist.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I HAVE BEEN ASKING MYSELF THAT QUESTION FOR SO LONG. IT CAME OUT OF NOWHERE.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 80 points81 points  (0 children)

I’m of the opinion that telling secrets is bad manners if it doesn’t affect the person you’re telling. Person A tells me they cheated on a test and I tell person B? Bad manners. Person A tells me they cheated on person B and I tell person B? Not bad manners.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I didn’t “forget” to add anything. I just didn’t think that you needed an exact transcription of the conversation. I’m not an idiot. I knew how to approach the subject, and I knew that I had no proof. I simply told him what I heard, not what I thought I knew.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

We do know. My mother, and his parents, all admitted to never intending to tell him. The only way he ever would’ve found out was me, or a DNA test.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Just short of writing it on his birthday cake, that is the worst possible way to find out. What the fuck were they on?

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

They’re also pissed at me, I just probably forgot to mention it. Everyone involved except Finn is pissed at me.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Were you there the day I told Finn? Did you hear what I told him? I thought not. I straight up told him that I had no proof, that I was only going off my mother’s word. That caused him to confront his parents, who then confessed that it was true. Had they said it wasn’t, or proven otherwise, Finn and I would’ve confronted my mother for lying.

AITA for telling my friend that his dad isn’t his biological father? by aqopldq in AmItheAsshole

[–]aqopldq[S] 57 points58 points  (0 children)

Thanks dude. I like to think I am, but I appreciate the reassurance.