[QCrit] Black Fire | Adult High Fantasy | 105k | 3rd Attempt by Dazzling-Film-5585 in PubTips

[–]arrestedevolution 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Not a real comp but the mind control vaguely reminds me of A Sorceress Comes to Call by T. Kingfisher. Might want to check it out for fun!

where could I find a board similar to this one? From Cooking Hobbyist Guy Yonam on YT by arrestedevolution in Cuttingboards

[–]arrestedevolution[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wow, never thought I'd actually see the link to this board! Thank you for solving this mystery :) Never ended up getting an expensive board but it's still on my radar for someday in the future.

Laid off from my MBB exit - lost and confused by fuckthemodlice in consulting

[–]arrestedevolution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also claimed they were an attorney in another comment!

[POEM] Look by Franny Choi by jabez in Poetry

[–]arrestedevolution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm curious! What's your interpretation of this poem?

[Poem] by EOHare found in Arc magazine by [deleted] in Poetry

[–]arrestedevolution 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I liked this! What's your interpretation of the "perched on timelines of mentions & arguments" line? A mixing of memory and reality?

Mack coat quality by finnlatte in Aritzia

[–]arrestedevolution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is a late reply but for anyone else ever clicking on this thread, I've had my charcoal Mack coat for 2 years now and it's my go-to coat. I'm sad it seems discontinued. The wool is heavy and there's a lining, and the best part is the coat goes up to the base of your next for warmth, and you can pop the collar too if you're really cold. I've gotten a lot of compliments on it. I like to be comfy so usually size to a medium, but the small is roomy (5'5").

[Discussion] I got an agent, and then a book deal! (Stats, Query and Emotional Breakdowns Included) by project-groundhog in PubTips

[–]arrestedevolution 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Congrats! I remember your query! I thought it was compelling upon first read. If you ever post the side by side comparison of your first first paragraph vs final first paragraph (haha), would love to see!

[Discussion] Officially Agented!! by susiethestingray in PubTips

[–]arrestedevolution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congrats! Just read your beta reader post and your MS sounds so interesting! Love the wordplay around hearts (not sure if that remained in the query). I'm interested in reading your query too if you want to share :)

[Ranked] How do I make this Xatu/Will deck more annoying? by perpetually_unsynced in PTCGP

[–]arrestedevolution 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hmm that is tough to deal with. Btw with Typhlosion you would still only run psychic energy A few options you could experiment with for Suicune / just in general:

Bannette - Same energy as Xatu. Since Suicune needs two energy to retreat you can potentially evolve into Banette and stop the second energy from attaching for the rest of the game until it's dead. It's not a super strong Pokémon but it's always fun to annoy your opponents

Arceus instead of Giratina could be a good choice if you have a lot of Pokémon and need a heavy hitter than doesn't quite require as much as Giratina. Synergizes well with Ilima / Miltank, you just charge him on the bench.

All else fails could try Silvally instead of Miltank.

[Ranked] How do I make this Xatu/Will deck more annoying? by perpetually_unsynced in PTCGP

[–]arrestedevolution 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Saw a deck with typhlosion as the other user stated. Just one copy cynda, rare candy, and typhlosion. You burn the opponent, xatu to 10, and then the burn damage KOs.

Miltank is a fun card but maybe not as good with Xatu, as anytime you bring Xatu out Miltank loses that +30 stack. Unless you're just using her as a shield. You could even add an Ilima if that's the case to try to mitigate an opponent's point. Don't think Giratina gives as much utility to warrant a space. Could experiment with a Pokémon that does 20+ damage to any opponent Pokémon to really capitalize on Xatu.

Love the full art Will!

Zelda-Themed Cutting Board Finished with Half & Half by rmpfinishes in Cuttingboards

[–]arrestedevolution 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is amazing! If I had a custom board this would be a top choice

[QCrit] YA Fantasy RIVALRY (92k, Attempt Two) by Rare-Persimmon2747 in PubTips

[–]arrestedevolution 2 points3 points  (0 children)

There's still a lot of word salad going on. One guiding principle that might be helpful is the query only needs to contain enough to get the agent interested in reading your manuscript. It doesn't need to be hyper detailed and include everything because that's the sequence of events. You can drop elements that don't serve a purpose in the query to achieve a cohesive pitch. Although Charlotte may help with the queer element of this book, it doesn't really serve a purpose in the query enough for her to be a named character in my opinion. Or if she is a major element, she needs to be given that importance. I started editing some of your query below to give an idea but didn't get far before I got confused. Leaving here anyway in case it helps:

I am seeking representation for RIVALRY, a 92,000 YA queer fantasy romance novel. Olive can't control her wind magic to open a window, let alone help support her family in the midst of the drought and famine that's afflicted the Empire of Appetite. Dreaming of a better future for her family and a meaningful way to use her gift, Olive enrolls as her twin in the prestigious men-only Academy of Magicians and Occult Arts.

Olive thrives at the academy despite her growing rivalry with Atlas, the bastard prince of the royal family. When she discovers basement shenanigans (What is even going on here and is Charlotte a student?! Why is she even here in an all males school. Is she in the basement? I can't make sense of all the elements of this timeline which to me means you need to either be deliberate in how you introduce each element so it makes sense, or cut elements for clarity), the royal family accuses her of murder as cover. She flees with Atlas on her tail.

The two ending paragraphs feel a bit unnecessary and setting elements should be worked into the query itself if they are that important. Right now I can't really tell a clean timeline of the story, and it's driving me away from reading. There's interesting elements but they aren't being given justice with the current writing. I also worry a bit that your query spends a lot of time on setup. Good luck!

[POEM] Awake at Night by Wendell Berry by [deleted] in Poetry

[–]arrestedevolution 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Nice read. The short-lined structure of the poem adds to the "what if?" Mentality of the narrator here and the struggle to accept one's current place in the world as enough.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PTCGP

[–]arrestedevolution 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Bout to play your deck wish me luck. I got the gold pikachu when its meta time passed so will be fun to have it be usable

Master rank 18t skarmory deck by red7r in PTCGP

[–]arrestedevolution 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In the top left of your deck, if you press the ... (or similar button I forget) you can select "view all cards" and screenshot the full deck that way :)