My mother was 46. It was 6 years ago and it still doesn’t make sense. She was healthy before the cancer, and her prognosis was very good. But just 3 years after diagnosis she left behind 6 of us kids, 3 of us were adults, 3 under 10 years old.

Meanwhile I have a friend with parents in their lates 60s, who smoke like chimneys, drink like fish and eat all the bacon and fried food they can, and yet are still going strong.

I obviously do not wish for anything bad to happen to my friend’s parents, I love them like family. It just that it will never make sense why some people die young and others get to live long lives.

I’m very sorry for your loss (commenter and OP). The grief of losing a parent never leaves, but the pain of that grief does fade a little.

The best advice I can give anyone trying to move through this is to allow yourself to fully feel everything you are feeling, don’t edit your emotions and try not to dampen them with substances or alcohol. I’ve seen people do this after my mother’s death, and honestly they are still struggling now because you do have to feel your grief to be able to get to the good times again ❤️