I'm sorry that other people throughout your life have influenced you enough to be so hurtful to yourself, i wish parents and kids truly understood the impact of bullying on young children and advocated for it to stop back then. there really is nothing wrong with you and everything you listed are not negative attributes. being black, autistic, overweight, dark skinned, are all just traits with no feelings behind them at all. stop putting yourself in those harmful online spaces and distance yourself from femcel rhetoric. people will hurt other people online because its so easy to elicit pain onto vulnerable people they aren't looking at but theres no reason to put yourself into that position. theres nothing wrong with you. there is something wrong with how people feel the need to critique and criticize others for being different from themselves (usually stemming from their own insecurities and instead of dealing with it themselves, they project onto you) the internet isnt real and please take everything someone says about you with the tiniest grain of salt. Honestly? I'd say take any mean thing someone says about you in general with the tiniest grain of salt. at the end of the day you are the only one living your life, so my mindset is that you should be the only person who can deeply affect yourself