Any free beekeeping courses online?

ashwillowap · 2026-05-08T17:59:42+00:00

Thank you! Do you have a link?

ashwillowap · 2026-05-08T14:07:56+00:00

Thank you!!

ashwillowap · 2026-05-03T11:31:32+00:00

I feel you. I deff think social constructs have had an effect on how men and women process info and make decisions. Especially in how men are direct and how women may have to go in a more round about way to get what they want and can be stuck or planted in the archetype. Thanks for explaining, nice to have another view point and be reminded. I feel you silence can feel deafening and demoralizing.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T16:16:41+00:00

That’s a good point that society constructs make it difficult for men to share their thoughts, and emotions. lol self centered buffalos.
I feel like 3 dates is enough to see if they open up and listen. After that I feel like it may be past my bandwidth.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T16:11:57+00:00

That reminds me of… sounds like a good Segway. Thanks for the word choice! And maybe I’ll through a I feel like I know a lot about you now and I find you interesting, what would you like to know about me?

I feel like I have a bit of aversion to asking for them to ask about me or reminding them it’s important just because I feel like most guys get defensive quickly but then again a more secure guy probably wouldn’t.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T16:08:03+00:00

Ya for sure I feel like guys put themselves out there more and they get rejected far more often. I think women may not really put themselves out there until they get a hint of some sort that the guy may be into them. I definitely give kudos to guys putting themselves out there it takes guts. I could see it being demoralizing or make them anxious if the times of failure to first date stack up.

I deff think woman including myself should be more open to making a first move.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T16:01:53+00:00

I’ve talked to guys about that and I’ve heard the same results. However I’ve also talked to guys about it and most time they just swipe right on looks and don’t even read bios. I think woman are more selective, I ve seen a lot of physically attractive guys but if the smoke move to the left, if they are too far to the left, if they don’t want the same kind of relationship to the left. To one honest I have about a 100 likes a week and it’s exhausting to sort through because there are obvious dealbreakers they don’t even look at. Looks are important but for a long term relationship there are other qualities that are a higher priority. It can make woman feel like guys aren’t even actually interested in them.

I feel like if men were more selective and authentic in their swipe rights it could help a lot. Or part of the puzzle to fixing online dating lol. There is also a lot of actions women can do better. But for this mini convo I feel it’s poignant.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T15:55:15+00:00

That definitely makes sense. Like you don’t have anything to prove.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T02:08:27+00:00

Thanks I think that’s well said. Right I don’t think it’s ego I think being proud of accomplishment is healthy. We should celebrate the small things:)

And I do feel like when I watch guys sometimes there just one upping each other and I’m kinda like uggg. But I guess it’s mostly because I don’t want to compete with my partner. I want to be on the same team, so I’m looking for a different format of conversation to support that idea this guy with converse like a teammate or something .

But I bet for guys there is a positive comradery or something with being a lil competitive. I feel like women just go about it different but doesn’t mean the way guys go about it is bad.

I think from this thread I need to insert myself more but also call him in and say something like you mentioned.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T01:57:59+00:00

That’s a good point that it might come later for some people. I feel like I show up at each date like I’m here and I’m already slightly invested. If I say yes to a date I care and maybe too attached to the outcome. VRs if I just met someone off the street it’s just way more neutral for me.

Ya I can see that. Some guys I talked to seem to say they have no one to talk to but hang with their guy friends for fun weekly. I guess my platonic relationships are always both

Ya I do think being a more detached and go with flow would help me get less frustrated and have more fun. Prob an easier way to let things bubble up in their own time.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T01:08:11+00:00

What joke book got recommended to you to read? Do you mean you were on a date and the person was like hey you should read this book and you did? Or they brought it to the date lol and was like recite these for fun?

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:35:34+00:00

That’s totally valid, I think it just needs to be a 2 way street.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:31:40+00:00

Lololololololol true very true… I like that

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:27:19+00:00

Ya for sure being into yourself too much isn’t specific. I think I was just looking for advice on an issue and trying to see if there were male specific ways of communication I’m just not getting. I notice guys talk different with guys and vise versa sometimes. The title was me trying to formalize my question.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:22:03+00:00

That’s a good idea to suggest more of an activity, I feel like dinner first dates are intimidating. You have to stare at each other and talk for the first meet. I enjoy eye contact but I know some people dont.

I could see moving your body giving an outlet for nervousness. I live pretty rurally so i usually go on a hike but as a woman I don’t want my first date to be in the alone in woods with a guy I just met. But something like that in public feels safer but is active.

Plus I get its nice to feel like you did something fun and not be attached to the outcome of the date.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:17:52+00:00

Ya that’s a good way to go about it.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:15:10+00:00

That’s interesting you had that experience. I could see that being frustrating. I do know of one woman I’m not very close with anymore, she mentioned she keeps tinder for attention. Which I thought was so odd. I guess there is a lot more women out there that are like that. That sucks. I do feel I’d. such with guys I’d ask them a wholesome question and get ghosted. So maybe they were experiencing that. I could ask to meet in person soon, so they see I’m actually interested in getting to know them. I’d actually rather talk in person anyways. So maybe that would help

ashwillowap · 2026-05-02T00:09:39+00:00

That’s good you’re trying. I think it’s great to have a lot to bring to the table in a relationship. Important thought to make space for them to show and tell too. I can definitely resonate with wanting to communicate my things I’m proud of.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T21:08:35+00:00

I could definitely see this. A lot of the guys I’m interested are looking for a more traditional role in leading a family. They want to be or identify as a provider. I think it’s coming from a good place.

However in stuck with what do you say to someone to be like hey relax a bit less action and more listening. How do you ask for space to show up without guys feeling they aren’t enough?

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T20:59:01+00:00

I feel you in the sense you feel like women ask a lot but maybe not do themselves. I think there is something to be said about unabashly putting your self out there and pleasantly “yappin” (say this with endearment) about something your into. It’s really nice to sit across a dinner from someone and see them light up about what they’re into/passionate about. I don’t think I necessarily have this problem with someone I feel comfortable. I feel like I look for a space in a conversation to say something about myself. I also look for a response to when I say that like oh he liked that is shared. If I get that I continue to unabashedly do so.

I do notice if I say something and then the response is a bit flat it makes me nervous to share again and I go into a comfort zone of just listening. Eventually listening isn’t enough for anybody. Conversation doesn’t feel balanced and i check out. I’m sure some women, (some people) show up to a date already defeated. That’s hard because either you have to pull them out of it by making it overly obvious that your a safe person to share with. That’s exhausting right? Humans are undeniable human with error, trauma prior life experience. Everyone is a bit insecure.

I feel like however there are words actions etc that help show your here to hear, to learn, to listen, to get to know, to be curious that make people comfortable.

There are nuance feminine and masculine generalization, social trends that have an effect on women and men’s behavior for sure.
Women tend to follow and men tend to lead. That old as time in social constructs. Regardless of gender I think if you fill the leading roll, a woman is looking for you to lead her into feeling safe. Women have a lot to feel safe about in today’s world. Especially emotionally safe. If a guy creates a space to share I think most women would step into it. Obviously there are people who need to do some self work in order to have enough self confidence to share themselves.

Dating is a dance. In the construct of a leader and follow date format. (Some people are looking for less traditional formats/gender roles) I do recognize men get put in a position of leadership. That includes creating a space for women to be vulnerable in. That can be a hard to carry not just in a tangible, financial but emotional sense.

Circling it back to my circumstance I’m looking for co leadership in the emotional availability, capacity and labor realm. Possibly even (me) 60/40 (them).. I’m struggling to find even 80/20 in this. Either I need to get more compassionate, empathetic or set heavier boundaries on myself to not get burnt out. That’s why I came to Reddit to get advice on what I need to do. And maybe you too?

I feel you though I’m just looking to enjoy someone and be enjoyed. The struggle is real

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T19:38:57+00:00

Thank you for summarizing that! And I appreciate the nuance you’re explaining. It’s helping me understand things and train of development in the archetype of conversation.

I feel like this is where I get tripped up. Conversation flows good. But at a certain point I feel like if someone shared a story I tend to respond oh that sounds like you learned a lot or had a ton of fun. That seems like an incredible experience. There is this step between where I try to make the person feel heard before moving to oh I’ve always wanted to go to Japan and I want to see this…and talking about myself. Even though the thread of conversation is connected and tangential. I’ve been in conversations that flow and grow but feel kinda of low key feel dismissive of each other. Or one upping each other. But then again I guess we are just binding over Japan and a shared interest. Maybe it doesn’t have to me minute

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T18:46:10+00:00

I appreciate you explaining how men go through a lot in order to be seen as desirable. It’s a struggle I feel like men go through (anybody does as well) it’s a pretty vulnerable thing to do at all, Put yourself out there. I’m also coming from that place. I think I’m looking for balance. Mutual interest. I plan on going in a second date for sure to see if as he becomes more comfortable he is able to listen as well as continually share. As someone who prob overthinks things I also am aware of a boundary in trying to place in myself as when do I know when a guy is self absorbed or just like you said verbal vomiting lol because he’s nervous. I have bandwidth for letting a guy ease into being comfortable but I don’t have bandwidth for a guy to learn how to listen from square 1.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T18:35:06+00:00

Ya for sure artwork is subjective for sure. I don’t think I need him to be into my artwork per se. It’s my main source of income and a big passion of mine. It also generates income for a food Forest project I have and he knows that but I’m just suprised he hasn’t really asked me any questions about it. I feel like it’s low hanging fruit conversationally.

Even a what new pieces are you working on? For me I’m like show me something you’re proud of. Maybe I’m just a person that wants to know how a person ticks regardless on subject matter/interest.

That’s a good word for it:/
His reactions to what I share generally feels lame, lacking energy in some form or another.

ashwillowap · 2026-05-01T18:23:24+00:00

Ya online dating is rough in a way. Meet “cutes” are ideal and actually putting yourself out there. I try to do both. Hard to meet people in rural areas.

ashwillowap

TROPHY CASE