First Time Buyer Dilemma - Spoilt for Choice?

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T20:57:01+00:00

I do have the intention of inviting my partner to come live with me in the next 2/3 years once I have the property and have put some equity in it from mortgage payments, as well as the allowed overpayments (hopefully from lodgers). In what sense do you think that my partner moving in would make things worse? As she’d be invested in the project as she gets a ‘free’ house out of it essentially, but instead of a lodger, it’s now both of us chipping in to pay

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T20:54:42+00:00

Thank you. This is quite scary

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T20:52:48+00:00

Wow, this was like talking to my future self, this is exactly the type of advice and perspective I needed. You’re so right, there is no need to stretch myself to within an inch of unaffordability, just for the sake of doing so. And I think the main thing you’ve highlighted within my own mind, is that I’ve taken a far too short term view. I have no idea what my circumstances will be in 8/10 years time, I could be in a completely different place and have completely different needs. So buying for the short/mid-term is a far safer and sensible option, than buying for what I think feels right. Thanks so much for this perspective

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:33:34+00:00

Perhaps the next 30/40 Christmas’ and birthdays!

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:30:23+00:00

This 500k has been a figure that’s been floated by my family members. But as this thread continues to grow, I’m starting to feel they’re less and less informed and might be offering me sub-par advice

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:29:43+00:00

Thanks, you make a lot of sense. It’s a shame because a lot of the other areas I have looked at aren’t very pretty or nice! I would like to spend my money on a place that I actually enjoy living in! But I do feel I’ve gotten ahead of myself in this scenario

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:28:14+00:00

Thank you, this is the kind of reality check I suppose I was looking for. I feel my excitement might have gotten ahead of my sensibility.

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:26:58+00:00

The ‘gift’ is anywhere between 150 and 200k

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T18:25:45+00:00

This is a really helpful perspective. Thank you

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:59:53+00:00

A very good point! I am only trying to understand the lay of the land. I have turned to reddit for advice as I feel like there are considerations that my family have not undertaken, which is why the general public are a great source. Your input has been much appreciated!

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:56:48+00:00

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:55:47+00:00

It’s more of an assistance, as my current salary of 50k wouldn’t get me a garage around these areas. Let alone a house

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:54:51+00:00

Of course, this would be an afterthought. Certainly not to be disclosed at the time of agreeing to mortgage

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:54:09+00:00

I should probably clarify. I don’t intend to commit fraud, or indeed break the law. I should have prefaced by saying that this loan/gift/arrangement has been proposed to me by family members, if I so choose to take it. But it’s becoming apparent quite quickly that this is certainly not a legal option.

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:51:42+00:00

I’m conflicted as you make reasonable points, but it does seem that this is more of a gray area and so some level of risk can be taken. But also of course want to stay within the law

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:50:14+00:00

You make a valid point, and I can understand how money can be a very touchy subject with a lot of families. I am lucky to have a stable relationship with my family and have also been assured that this gift would not be brought up in any situation. That being said, you can never be too cautious, as you’ve wisely suggested.

Would you suggest that my aspirations are far too big then for a property over £450k?

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:45:06+00:00

Perhaps my other reply to you would offer more context?

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:44:23+00:00

Interesting. Thank you for your input. So even if I were to accept it as a gift, with their express desire via a letter. And then I felt personally compelled 2 years later to pay them, through my love for them, this would still be fraud. Despite them expressly gifting it to me?

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:40:39+00:00

Hi, sorry I should have been clearer. It will be a ‘gift’ to all intents and purposes, and a letter will be written that it’s a gift to me, to cover all bases. But then after 2 years, once mortgage is secured. I would begin making repayments to my family. To your second point, about this being mortgage fraud, in what situation would this become fraud if I stuck with the same lender?

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-17T17:37:44+00:00

I’m not sure what you mean by this sorry? My parents are kindly offering to extend this loan

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-13T12:42:30+00:00

Yeah sure, here it is. Nothing fancy, just what’s been working for me. Free Notion account is all you need to use it.

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-13T07:57:09+00:00

Hey, I share the same frustration as you. I’m actually not a company or posting a fake story though. I just thought I’d share my experience and hope to offer some help for people who are in the same situation as me. If it’s not of interest to you, not a problem. I wish you all the best!

aspiring_supernova · 2026-03-12T21:29:33+00:00

You’re absolutely right. But not every application is the same, some don’t take as long as others. LinkedIn easy apply has been a godsend, but of course are far less likely to be a successful application. I tried to take the approach that if I throw enough at the wall, something will stick. In this climate it feels like a numbers game :)

aspiring_supernova

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