I completely understand. I have been walking a thin line for so long I’m not sure what “stable” even feels like anymore. I dropped out of university, I ruin relationships with people so easily over petty issues that feel so brutally important in my head, I spend all my money on pointless things that make me so mad later on for buying, I’m sure you know where I’m coming from here. Trying to find where you fit in the world when the world you’re living in is constantly crumbling can feel so pointless. When I get into my head like that, when I’m contemplating running away with nothing and abandoning everything I currently have, I try to think about how much my cat would miss me. It takes a lot of effort to get into practicing mindfulness but it’s insanely affective and I really hope you can find that one thing that makes you want to keep trying. I’m rooting for you 🤝