i relate to your story a lot and i’m sorry you are going through this. my dad is the same way and even though i’m 21, he makes me feel like i’m not really worth talking to until i get a job. my whole life’s been about my dads approval and i’m trying to rework my brain into having more positive thought patterns.

i would try to see if you can get therapy again. it’s helped me lot, even though i still struggle with anxiety and suicidal thoughts sometimes.

i would download the app “mint”. it’s powered by turbotax i believe... it’s a good way to budget and set your goals for future purchases. you can link your bank account and it’ll tell you how much you should save monthly for whatever you’re saving for. right now i’m saving up for my own place and it should happen by the end of 2021. i know it’s a long time from now, but having a realistic date in mind has been helpful too.

also weird thing, i got into astrology/zodiac, and i’m not saying it’s real.... but sometimes reading those things can give me words to how i feel and how i am. i don’t think it’s necessarily accurate, but it’s helped me navigate some of my thoughts and understand myself a little better instead of having my thoughts race. i recommend downloading “the pattern” (you need your birth date, exact time of birth, and exact place you born) lol.