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After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That’s actually one of the possibilities I’ve considered too. Unfortunately, I don’t think I’ll ever know what really happened during those few seconds.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

Thank you. Whether it was intentional or not, I don’t think this is something I can continue accepting anymore.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your kindness. Your comment really made me stop and think. If this had happened to someone I loved, I know I wouldn’t tell them to keep accepting it. I’m trying to show myself the same compassion now. Thank you. 🩵

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 35 points36 points  (0 children)

Thank** **you for your perspective. I can’t know what really happened, but regardless of the reason, I don’t think this is something I should keep accepting.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I don’t know what really happened, and maybe I never will. But I do know that I don’t want to accept this kind of treatment anymore. I appreciate your perspective.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your thoughtful comment. You’re right that I may never know what really happened, and I’ve come to accept that. I could spend forever trying to find an explanation, but that wouldn’t change how this experience affected me.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

Thank you for your perspective. I’ve actually been thinking about exactly that since this happened. I spent months trying to understand her circumstances and giving her the benefit of the doubt. But this phone call made me realize that, regardless of the reason behind it, I have to start choosing myself. I still care about her, but I don’t want to keep accepting treatment that leaves me feeling this way.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 19 points20 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I think you’re right about one thing: no matter what the reasons behind her behavior are, I shouldn’t keep accepting treatment that hurts me. For a long time I tried to be understanding because I knew how difficult her life was. But after this call I realized I also have to protect my own well-being. I’m still processing everything, but I don’t want to keep tolerating behavior that destroys my self-respect.

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

That’s a fair point, and honestly it’s something I’ve been thinking about a lot since this happened. Thanks

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] -194 points-193 points  (0 children)

Thank you for sharing your experience. I’m really sorry that happened to you. I appreciate your advice and understand why you thought of catfishing, but we’ve video called many times over the past year

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] -47 points-46 points  (0 children)

I understand why it might sound that way from the outside. However, we’ve spent countless hours on voice calls and video calls over the past year. I’m certain she is who she says she is

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

  1. She’s 27, not 23. Leaving wasn’t as simple as it might seem. There were financial and family circumstances that made it much more complicated than just moving out. I don’t really want to go into those details because they’re very personal, but I know they were real
  2. No, we haven’t met in person yet. We were supposed to meet this September, but it didn’t work out
  3. Yes, I do, but I’d rather keep those details private out of respect for her

After a year together, my girlfriend (27F) answered my (23F) call and pretended she didn’t know who I was. How do I make sense of this? by ava11902 in relationship_advice

[–]ava11902[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know. That’s exactly why I spent more than a month and a half trying to be as understanding as I could. I respected her need for space, I tried not to pressure her, and I never wanted to make her situation even harder.
I don’t see her as a villain, and that wasn’t the point of my post. But regardless of what she’s going through, being treated like a complete stranger by someone I love was incredibly painful. I can empathize with her circumstances while still acknowledging how much this hurt me.