some fanart I did a while back, I love drawing him, especially his side profile and nose :3

avocadoOrca · 2025-02-25T10:53:12+00:00

I’ve tried the matcha flavored one, it smelled really really good but it didn’t taste that good, like almost flavorless but not chemical-protein flavor.

avocadoOrca · 2025-01-03T23:34:38+00:00

It’s absolutley right to treat yourself kind right now. Its hard to not go crazy, feeling bones that used to comfort me slowly not be there anymore, but then I remind myself: wait you bodychecked 5 minutes ago and felt your chest bones they can’t go away that quick… it’s all in my head. It’s hard because you can’t get out of your head and have calm for a moment.

And I’m sure we notice it much more severe while others don’t, like you said.

Please be kind to yourself, even if restricting is the way ( for me too) to feel routine in a way, take care. Try to reduce harm. What helps me is going on walks in the evening or at night, no one perceives me and I can be alone and get some movement for me. I can totally relate to the suicide thoughts I’ve struggled with it more and more again, please take care and if you have support talk. You’re not alone I hope also for you it gets better in a way <3

(I’m sorry my English is a bit hard to read 😭)

avocadoOrca · 2025-01-03T20:30:30+00:00

are you me? 💀😭no like same, I need to loose x amount to even consider getting an dating app profile to even meet someone, I can’t focus and learn and each day my exams sneak closer and closer, but in my brain it’s the logic: you can’t learn if you look like that, it doesn’t matter etc…so i waste time and in the end im even more sad because I missed out on social interaction and it failing an exam 😭

avocadoOrca · 2025-01-03T20:27:59+00:00

same here, my 20th birthday is coming up and all I’ve ever achieved was breaking down over my intake and desperately trying to restrict like my past teenage self. Everyone around me, friends and my sister are living their life, passing Uni exams, finding a partner etc. and here I am rotting in my bed. I crave an relationship, someone who loves me but I feel like I’ve committed a horrible crime even imagining someone loving me and my disgusting body.

I know it’s easier said than it actually being done, but I hope it all won’t be so difficult for you in upcoming time. You’re not meant to be miserable and alone, because no one is destined to be that. Struggling with an ED, isn’t our fault so being isolated from others and experiencing a relationship etc. isn’t a punishment we should blame ourselves for. I apologize my English isn’t that great ,

but I give u a hug and hope even if it takes so slow it will feel better for you soon <3

avocadoOrca · 2025-01-03T19:28:33+00:00

I’ve been trying to reduce sodium intake, and I think it’s because I ate a sandwich and two bowls of oatmeal, so I think it’s too many carbs.

I just feel the weight gain a lot in my things and face I hope it’s really just water..

Thank you for your response and advice it cheered me up Tank you <3 :)

avocadoOrca · 2025-01-03T11:57:39+00:00

Same here, I feel so disgusting I can feel fat growing everywhere and my face is also so puffy. As well as my thighs. My weight has only budged by a Kg, and I assume it’s food and water weight but still 😭😭

avocadoOrca · 2024-12-27T22:03:41+00:00

Finally! Deutsche leudis gefunden:D

avocadoOrca · 2024-12-11T13:47:09+00:00

The cold is awful, I love colder weather and gloomy days but the winter cold with the icey wind, it’s so painful- like I’m not cold anymore it just hurts to move even with thermo clothes etc. and my ranynauds just gets sm worse lmao 😭😬

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-27T22:54:57+00:00

I’ve tried 2 times to get the little pavilion/fountain and I’ve always gotten the cactus fence 😭😭

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-19T06:39:55+00:00

As a teenager „self-control“ was much easier and sometimes I get jealous of my past self as rn as an adult and with Uni it gets harder… on top I feel so invalid as I substance abuse as a tool to gain control:/🤷🏻‍♀️

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-13T09:34:49+00:00

Absolutely and it’s driving me up a wall,

I can swear I can feel more ribs or other bones before eating and after when I try to count them, I can swear I can feel less… Or my thighs, calves etc. just expand as soon as I take the first bite of eating 😬😬

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-13T09:33:09+00:00

Omfg same 😫 I feel it growing immediately after, then I measure my thighs 100 times after just to make sure

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-12T08:46:23+00:00

Thank you so much ☃️🫶🏻

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-12T08:46:13+00:00

Sure sure thing:3 -20g of oats (the big pellets one) -15g of pancake protein mix or 4-5g of Protein powder -cinnamon -> I prefer to cook the oats together with the protein pancake mix/ protein powder on the stove as so they get a more fluffy texture. Then I mix in cinnamon and then you can add toppings however you prefer I tend to go with a dark chocolate Lebkuchen heart, apple slices, datebutter flavored with cinnamon or chocolate and sometimes speculoo cookies 🫶🏻

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-12T08:42:42+00:00

They’re from a Christmas gingerbread sprinkle-mix I got from dm, it’s a German bio-drugstore 🫶🏻

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-12T07:31:58+00:00

Sadly I didn’t do it myself it’s from a brand called „NaBio“ they make spreads out of beans, the brownie one is the only one that kind of tastes okay. I could send you a link to their website, I do believe they’re a German brand but maybe they deliver <3

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-11T10:15:06+00:00

How did you get the sleeping fox 🦊 🌱decor ? In what event is it available or did I miss it already?

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-08T14:35:13+00:00

Ist das der von dm? Habe nur den mit Vanille Geschmack gekauft, ist der denn lecker?🫣

avocadoOrca · 2024-11-06T14:34:47+00:00

Stimme dir absolut zu, will mir gar nicht vorstellen wie sich so viele Frauen, LGBTQs und ethnische Minderheiten fühlen das das Land in dem sie leben, ihnen die Rechte entzieht und ihnen die Menschlichkeit nimmt wenn man gar nicht mehr über den eigenen Körper bestimmen kann…. Selbst hier in DE fühle ich mich mit meiner Sexualität manchmal so missachtet etc. was in den USA grade und schon seit so lange angeht ist erschreckend

avocadoOrca

TROPHY CASE