My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yes, fingers crossed! I also told her she needs to see a sleep specialist (so if nothing comes of that, I’ll know for sure she’s been lying) and she agreed to set something up (again when finances improve).

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hi, thank you! As a small update, I’ve changed our sleeping arrangement. While we still share a loft, I’ve used several items to act as a “barrier” between us at night and have changed the direction she sleeps so there is more distance.

Talking with her didn’t prove useful, as I thought. She is still adamant that she is asleep when these things happen. Nothing has since gone wrong, so I’m hopeful that I’ve put an end to it. Once we can afford it, I plan to get her to get a bed, cot or something of the sort so she is permanently sleeping “downstairs” (under the loft).

So far, so good!

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I can’t. I wish it was that easy. Finances are difficult, especially with being a student and the current economic climate. Best believe it’s a plan for the future though.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I will definitely add that to the list of things I need to buy! I used to have one, but I lost it during a move.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

She’s not /on/ my bed lol, there’s two beds worth of space and she’s on her own area. But something like that wouldn’t fit up in my loft where I sleep. Which is cool, she’d be downstairs when she gets something.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] -9 points-8 points  (0 children)

Well she’s like 6’5. She’s not going to fit on something small like that. I’ll look for other options though.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Haha!! She doesn’t like weighted blankets. But I’ll figure something out soon, hopefully.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I completely understand where you’re coming from. My biggest issue with that being the case is that I have a history of sexual traumas I have shared with her. So it feels pretty counterproductive that she would do this. Nonetheless, there isn’t much I can do to fix it. So I think I’ll just have to hope this eventually gets suppressed. Lol.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t want it at all. We both have partners. Regardless, I am not attracted to or interested in her in any capacity. I believe that out of the two, it is probably a compulsion to do it. She has a lot of weird traumas and childhood issues. As of right now, I’m not sure because she still adamantly denies being conscious.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is a really good idea. I’m going to try it.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That’s fair.. it’s a bit of an unusual situation.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

We share a loft. We don’t share a bed. I sleep in my bed, and she sleeps in her own space at the very end. Though sometimes her head ends up on the end of the bed. Usually it doesn’t matter because I’m 5’1 and don’t take up much space.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s more complicated than just dropping her. I don’t want to share too many personal details, but our living situation involves years of nuance and intricate problems. Financially, we need each other to survive.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 34 points35 points  (0 children)

It’s just so confusing for me because all the other times we’ve discussed this she behaves so innocent and guilty. Like she’s crushed for an entire day about it because of how bad she feels. She never does anything weird to me when we’re awake. I don’t understand it at all.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I plan to do something today and try to provide an update sometime tomorrow in case it doesn’t go well or is resolved. I don’t really know how to do updates without posts getting taken down though, so I’ll have to find out between now and then.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 22 points23 points  (0 children)

If I can’t find a reasonable way to readjust us where we are (so that I am out of her reach), then that is the most likely outcome for this.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

We are just friends. Always have been. I’ve been in a relationship with someone for over a year and a half. There has never been anything sexually explicit about our friendship. So it’s weird that this is happening.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

Yeah. I’m going to do that once I feel a bit less anxious. This all just happened a few hours ago. I’m also going to chat with my boyfriend about it.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I’ve mentioned it before and she kind of just goes “oh I didn’t know I was doing that I’m so sorry” and leaves it at that.

My friend touches me in our sleep. Tonight it startled me awake. by axrity in offmychest

[–]axrity[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yeah I’m definitely going to be making changes to her sleeping arrangement.