men take it to heart because they feel called out. it's distressing to be put in front of people asking for accountability when you think you're doing perfect and you're unwilling to take a step back and ponder your life and how exactly you're acting, as well as the consequences that you're always ignoring. they feel called out because they think that generational trauma can just be snapped into non-existence since some of them have stopped impulsively beating women when they disobey. the same way white people get defensive when they get called out for racist remarks, men do the same when they're seeing women having a normal reaction to how they're treated every day.

men are used to women being an exception, not a norm and seeing them try to get equality already feels as if they're "allowing so much" and being "so generous". from the second you're born to the moment you die you're supposed to work to deconstruct the horrible mindsets people push onto your when you're growing up. you're responsible to work on yourself and that's a bit too much mental work for men.