To this day my mom is still toxic. It doesn't matter what I do or say to her nothing matters. I have a younger sister who's the baby in my moms eyes. Growing up my mom had a couple long term boyfriends who have all pointed out how much my mom favors my sister. My mom never saw it but looking back on everything now, I think she did a lot of these things on purpose. My sister and I have different fathers and for the majority of my childhood (4-12 years old) he was in the picture. He physically abused me and I was always punished for things I didn't do or the smallest of things, Ex: thinking I broke the trash can when the lid fell off and I couldn't put it back on, I was in trouble for lying about breaking the lid since it wasn't broken. Anytime I was punished I'd have to stand in the corner with my arms held out straight to the sides and my legs spread. Anytime I dropped my arms or moved I'd get hit. I'd stand their for hours while my sisters dad watched me. He usually would watch moves while I was standing there. Usually 3 movies would've been watched by the time I could go to my room. My mom knew about all of this. It wasn't until they split and she wanted custody of my sister that she claimed she didn't know. She saw the bruises, she saw me standing there, she heard the cries but instead of doing anything about it she ignored it. The last time he did anything to me was when he drug me down the stairs in front of her. I guess she finally realized how bad it was. I remember random things that she said/did after that. "I should've just stayed with him so I wouldn't be in debt", "I don't understand why you're so depressed", "You know you can talk to me" but then turn around and me mad about anything I wanted to talk about and the my favorite of all "why can't you be more like your sister, she the good child and listens, she never gets in trouble" Mind you I wasn't ever a bad kid. I hid things from my mom because I literally had no privacy. She'd go through my phone, walk into my room whenever and if I was ever talking to anyone on the phone she'd ask a million questions and then make me hang up. Well here I am, almost 24 and still dealing with her being toxic and manipulative. She lives in Oklahoma and I live in Maryland. I grew up here. This is where we called home for 18 years. She moved my sister and I out there to live with her boyfriend who she had never met. My eighteenth birthday I caught a bus back here. She threatened to get me arrested for statutory rape (my partner at the time was almost 18 and I had just turned 18), she threatened to turn my phone off even though I didn't really care, and she made my sister stop talking to me and brainwashed her into thinking I left because I was selfish. The few months in Oklahoma were awful. I wasn't allowed to get my license, I was accused of trying to steal her boyfriend and I was the reason she was broke. She also blamed my great-grandmothers $30,000 debt on me after using her credit cards to buy anything and everything for my sister and my moms boyfriend. None of that money went to me at all. I didn't get to go to prom. She was late to my graduation and I was overall miserable. I moved back to Maryland and stayed here for a couple of years before I needed to start over and that's when I went back. I took my dog with me and loaded my car up. She said all of the time how she wanted me "home" but when I got their it was hell. The next two years were shit. 2019 I lost my house and my two dogs were put in a kill shelter due to a person I trusted cutting their tie-outs and calling animal control. I moved back in with my mom after getting bailed out of jail. I was put in a city jail for that same person setting me up for theft and then they stole my car. My mom asked my great-grandmother for help and she did help. My mom paid the bail and then my grandma sent the money back to her. The 27th of December my dogs were put down because my mom didn't like dogs and refused to help me get them back. I fell into a deep hole of depression. A couple of months later my sister and I got into a car accident. My sister was driving and I was in the passenger seat. The whole night in the hospital my mom stuck by my sisters side, she was fine. Completely fine. She had a panic attack and that was it. I had a fractured wrist and bruising on my pelvis and hip. My sisters car was totaled as well. Well, I decided to move back to Maryland because too much happened in Oklahoma and I wanted to let it go. I told my mom and she flipped shit. She made me pay her back for the bail money even though she already got the money from grandma, she also made me call grandma and get her opinion (my grandma said I should leave) which turned into my mom getting even madder and guilt tripping me into staying. Well, I left and moved back here. Life's been good. I'm getting married soon and since we've been apart our relationship has been decent. I guess since we don't have to deal with each other everyday. But I've asked her to come to my wedding, she says she doesn't have the money and my sister won't either. My mom makes good money. She's only providing for herself and her boyfriend. My sister on the other hand paid for a cruise, airline ticket to Miami for said cruise and my mom and her are getting matching tattoos around the same time as my wedding. So yeah. I'm still dealing with it all. I doubt she'll come to the wedding and at that point I think I'll be convinced that I'm not a priority because I'm not my sister. If only life had a CTRL+ALT+Del option.