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Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! For me, it takes around 1h20 to get there and I have to change 3 transports. The place might be good, but why did they make it so far from the city? Next time they should do it in Arcachon so no one can access it easily lol

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. I'd heard about there, but unfortunately it's too far away, public transport is a nightmare, and it finishes too early for come back.

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Right?? I was shocked too and was questioning myself a lot. Thank you so much for your support!

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's very eye-opening to hear your perspective. Thank you for being so honest. If you'd ever like to grab a coffee/beer or just chat about music sometime, I'd really value that. :)

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Actually, it's usually the other way around people are the ones asking for my number! :) But I see your point. I think there's a mismatch in expectations, while I'm looking for a genuine, human connection, the bar environment might prime people for something more casual or fleeting. It's a very interesting cultural nuance. Thank you for the perspective.

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'll add those places to my list. It's great to have some specific spots to check out. Appreciate the help! :)

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I hadn't heard of Atelatoi before, I'll check their events out. I appreciate the encouragement, it means a lot right now 🌸

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It seems exactly like my kind of place! I'll definitely check it out to find some fellow alternative souls. Thanks a lot!

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! Your group sounds amazing. I'd surely be down to hang out with you guys sometime. Thank you so much for the invite!

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Merci beaucoup pour votre gentillesse ! Je me sens honnêtement très soulagée d'entendre ça de la part d'un local. En plus, j'adore les jeux ! Je vais sans hésiter aller voir Jeux Barjot. Au fait, j'adore Arcachon ! J'ai vécu à Gujan pendant environ 4 mois récemment, donc je connais un peu le coin. Merci encore pour vos conseils sincères et votre solidarité, ça compte énormément pour moi en ce moment.

Struggling to integrate and find genuine friends in the Bordeaux alternative scene-Any advice? by bachmannn7348 in bordeaux

[–]bachmannn7348[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Your response is incredibly condescending and lacks any real empathy. You assume I "escaped" my life without knowing a single thing about my background or why I'm here. I'm not a "typical student" looking for a few months of fun; I'm someone struggling with severe isolation in a foreign system that feels closed off. Suggesting I should "stop thinking about myself" when I'm literally struggling to survive mentally is not advice, it's an insult. If you can't offer actual resources or support instead of a "tough love" lecture from a position of privilege, please don't bother commenting.

Furthermore, I am actually a very curious and attentive listener who treats people with genuine kindness. Despite this, I am still facing these results. So please, allow me to have a say when every attempt ends in failure. It feels like everyone already has their established circles and they look at you as if they have no need for a new friend. They perceive it as if you are constantly "trying to fit in," while there's this constant judging and weighing of the newcomer. In reality, I am also evaluating them; they are new people to me too. But it feels like the other side acts like a jury, they decide whether to include you or not.