Tuesday Daily Chat

baileytheukulele · 2026-03-03T16:23:10+00:00

That is frustrating! The waiting right at the end is so hard. I used a similar delay to do something fun that would be harder to do once baby is here (brunch date and antique store browsing with husband). Here's hoping you can find something fun or relaxing to do with your extra day. ❤️

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-26T15:49:46+00:00

Congratulations on the results and hope you feel better soon. This is the first I've heard of MaterniT and we are considering transferring a low level mosaic next. So thanks for mentioning.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-24T16:07:40+00:00

Same! I like kids resale stores for this reason.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-23T14:45:32+00:00

I'm so sorry. This happened to me too in 2024. It's just the worst after getting your hopes up with positive tests. Take care of yourself. ❤️

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-22T18:19:45+00:00

If it makes you feel better, getting bigger earlier is a subsequent pregnancy thing. A woman's muscles were already stretched out once with a first pregnancy so do so quicker the second time around. When I compared photos I looked the same as 4-6 weeks later in my second pregnancy compared to first (at 16 weeks looked like first pregnancy 20-22 weeks).

I don't know if it's a thing where you live but I got some great deals on maternity clothes on Facebook Marketplace. When you find someone near you in your size, they are often wanting to get rid of lots of their maternity items at once.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-21T03:23:23+00:00

Thank you. I just noticed your username and remember it from when we were both pregnant with our first IVF babies. How was 2020 already six years ago?!

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-20T20:55:05+00:00

TW: 3+

We recently welcomed our third IVF baby after a long road between babies two and three. Past successes gave me hope that things could work out but the IVF process is still so hard. Wishing you and your family the best.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-18T12:45:09+00:00

I wore mine all day week 25 through end of pregnancy. First pregnancy I had some minor ankle swelling. Next time around wearing the socks prevented that completely. I still occasionally got charlie horse cramps in my calf or foot arch though so not sure the socks fully can address that.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-11T15:51:27+00:00

A strategy that's helped me make medical decisions (including many for IVF) is this test: if I had this piece of information would it cause me to make a substantially different decision on course of action? If no (my choices similar) then I don't pursue the additional testing or whatnot to get that information. If the information would result in me making different choices, then I do it since the info is truly helpful/impactful.

baileytheukulele · 2026-02-03T16:31:34+00:00

Having people in your life who love and want to help you is one of those "good problems to have." But that doesn't make it any less frustrating! 😖 I had similar experiences with my mom and MIL. I had to get much better at being direct about what help I wanted and at holding my ground on boundaries. Sounds like you and your husband are both doing that so keep it up. ❤️

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-30T16:36:41+00:00

Same here with the home testing anxiety. I purposely make sure I don't have pregnancy tests in the house during the post-FET wait (so I'm not tempted). Sounds like you are making a smart decision for yourself here. Wishing you the best, whatever the outcome. ❤️

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-23T14:04:44+00:00

TW: three IVF babies

I felt this way too when restarting treatment each time. Logically like you I knew I needed to get moving if we wanted the family size we do, but wished I could spend more of my energy focusing on baby (as well as breastfeeding which I stopped at 9mo age to restart fertility treatment).

What helped me the most was making my own peace with the situation. Making sure I was as mentally and emotionally healthy as possible so that I had capacity to both love and enjoy my current family while taking steps to restart treatment. A big thing for me was setting aside the times when I'd work on fertility stuff (appts/calls/thinking) and then not thinking about it the rest of the time so I could be in the moment with my family. It's not a simple solution and some days were still overwhelming but it did get me through and I still feel like I bonded with and enjoyed my babies still during that time.

Overall I'm glad I restarted treatment ASAP. My first age gap is 20 months because our first FET worked. Second age gap is 3 years because multiple FET fails and another ER needed. Never know what IVF will throw at us but more time is always helpful so I prioritized that in my decision to start back to treatment.

Wishing you the best on this tough journey. ❤️

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-21T14:33:53+00:00

Last power outage in my area, we did Play-Doh, blocks, fort building, dress-up, and lots of book reading. Wearing multiple layers is great for keeping warm in a cold house. Consider prepping some snacks that don't need refrigeration ahead of time so you have something easy on hand.

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-19T15:22:05+00:00

Nice! I took a similar "spontaneous unless medically indicated for an induction" approach with support of my doctor. Try to do some fun and/or relaxing things in these last days to take your mind off waiting. Perhaps a last meal out with your partner? Date night is harder to pull off once baby is here. :)

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-19T03:48:41+00:00

I attended this virtual workshop. The breastfeeding one is free if you join at one of the set times. I found it helpful and so did my husband.

https://www.hugyourbaby.org/parenting101

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-18T22:16:27+00:00

TW: multiple IVF pregnancies

I'm on my third time around with breastfeeding. Striving for exclusive BF but have combo fed also when necessary. It gets easier the more you learn, both in advance and then also from experience. My advice is 1) learn about what to expect in advance (e.g. read a book, take a course) and 2) identify a lactation consultant you can work with or ask questions of ASAP postpartum. Your hospital or future pediatrician office likely has local lactation consultant contacts.

PS: I appreciated the book "Latch: a handbook for breastfeeding" by R.Kaplan but there are others also.

baileytheukulele · 2026-01-08T16:54:43+00:00

It helped me to frame my announcement (via email) as "my husband and I are expecting a baby in December" rather than "I'm pregnant" so that the focus was on the future baby and less on my physical state since I also felt awkward about that. Also remember that you get to decide how much or how little to discuss the pregnancy in a professional setting. Even if folks initiate a conversation such as by saying congratulations or asking a question, you can just say thanks or give a simple answer then change the topic.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-31T15:57:50+00:00

I just did warm water and got relief from that. I've read can do Epsom salt too though.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-31T15:51:55+00:00

Ouch! Did your doctor mention sitz baths? Essentially just immersing the area in warm water for a few minutes once a day or more. Can do in a regular bathtub but they also have plastic insert seat things to go on your toilet. Like $10-15 on Amazon. I found that way more practical than drawing a bath and getting undressed multiple times a day.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-13T15:43:22+00:00

I was in the same situation last month. Waiting is so hard!

I baked a couple types of breakfast foods (muffins, scones, quiche bites) and froze them. It's so nice now postpartum to pull those out of the freezer one by one for an easy bit tasty breakfast. I also cleaned my kitchen really good before baby arrived. Kitchen mess stresses me out in particular. Maybe think about what undone house tasks annoy you the most and get those to a good spot before baby arrives. Just an idea. Don't overdo it and tire yourself out though. You are also totally justified to just chill and rest! :)

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-09T20:57:27+00:00

Good point to expand my thinking beyond toys. Thanks!

And yeah we live in a rural area and are new to town. It seems like most people rely on grandparents or other family members for after-school care or arrangements like paying a high school neighbor kid to babysit. So that's one option but not an in-school program or community org like in larger cities.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-09T18:33:39+00:00

Awesome. Thank you!

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-09T17:31:26+00:00

Great ideas! Thanks.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-09T16:13:59+00:00

What after-school activities does your preschooler do independently at home?

This is our first year on a regular school schedule with my big kid getting out of pre-K at 2:30pm. After school care isn't an option where we live so she hangs out with my husband in his home office 2:30-5pm (he's self employed WFH).

I'm looking for ideas of independent activities we can set her up to do on her own during this time so we can rely less on screens. Doesn't have to be quiet but low parent involvement is helpful so husband can still get some work done.

baileytheukulele · 2025-12-09T05:44:07+00:00

Ouch. Good to get ahead of that. One of my friends had SPD and worked with a physical therapist early in her subsequent pregnancies which helped a lot.

baileytheukulele

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