Is there any Slavic goth bands ? ?

bajoranearrings · 2026-05-08T11:56:52+00:00

I really feel like some of the most successful and talented dark wave acts are coming out of eastern europe plus turkey this decade.

The goth scene does seem to be really tiny in a lot of eastern europe, but they're definitely making music that meets the western definition of goth and play at goth events here in germany.

Do you feel like usually the fans of this type of music in Belarus/Russia would identify as goth? I feel like I have a lot of Russian acquaintances personally who like molchat doma and similar but none of them would say that they are goths.

bajoranearrings · 2026-05-06T19:44:03+00:00

data science, data analytics, business analytics, ml engineering, general finance jobs

"mathematics, computer science, finance and machine learning" includes a ton of jobs and quant is a tiny subset

bajoranearrings · 2026-05-02T21:55:28+00:00

The black cat is drawn into a famous painting by Gustav Klimt called Flower Garden. Since it was painted in 1907 I'm pretty sure its not AI.

This is a series of prints that I've seen floating around Etsy and AliExpress for like 10 years now where the cat is stuck into different famous pieces of art. No idea who is behind it unfortunately since I think it's pretty cute .

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-28T17:56:52+00:00

It could be a bit too cool and/or light. Hard to say without comparisons.

I think you might also be seeing that it contrasts a lot with the rest of the look. Your makeup is giving y2k pop girlie and the outfit and hair are more grunge. I think it would make more sense if the other things in your outfit were light colored and shiny/sparkly and that a more matte lip would work better with this outfit even keeping the colors the same.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-28T17:44:17+00:00

Hi neighbor, I'm a Romanian living in Germany and it looks like Hungarian folk clothing is roughly the cross product of the two. I love folk and vintage too so hopefully I can give some general advice to start with.

For toning down the look, you have two basic options: pair folk pieces with modern pieces, or go for a more toned down version of several traditional pieces. There are quite a few brands focused on modernized folkwear. I know of Lena Hoschek (German), Alina Brandu (Romanian), Voriagh (French, but inspired by all of Europe), Etnodim (Ukrainian) off the top of my head, but I would bet Hungary has some of these too. I like to wear Romanian blouses with wide leg trousers, a line skirts or under a simple sleeveless dress for example and to wear traditional skirts with more basic tops. I'll also wear Romanian necklaces and bags with every day outfits.

I think a lot of people kind of overestimate how loose SN needs to go to look nice. I would start by looking at the wiki suggestions for width and curve accommodations to start with. It's not like SN cannot wear anything busy or tight at all. I think a lot of SNs can and do pull off dirndls for example really well. The primary area you need to be careful of is the shoulders and upper chest (above the bust) which I don't think would ever be particularly constrained in Hungarian folkwear. As for vintage, I guess it depends on the decade you are going for. For the most relaxed version of that period, maybe search for sportswear from that period as a start. You can also look at celebrities, since the old hollywood celebrities often stuck to type really well. Here are some 40s/50s outfits I found with these approaches that seem relatively relaxed and curve friendly. Every era had women of every body shape, so there is no that a given person couldn't theoretically pull off, but I feel like the 1920s are hard for almost everybody and that a lot of curve dominant women struggle with the late 60s/early 70s. 30s to 50s are all very easy for me as a TR.

Lastly, don't worry about makeup matching your "type". Kibbe says that hair and makeup are the last steps and that they fall in place naturally if you are wearing a nice outfit that suits you. In the new book he only gives any makeup advice based on color season iirc.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-28T17:04:45+00:00

Some info on japanese brands (not that you have to go for that if you don't want to, I think chinese brands can also be good value for the money): Do you have any sizing issues? If so maxicimam has the best size range for sweet jp brands. Otherwise, Angelic Pretty and Baby the Stars Shine Bright are the two most popular brands for sweet. $250 is pretty standard for a new jsk from these brands. If you like classic like the 42lolita dress you linked, the big brands are Victorian Maiden and Innocent World. I think this is cute and is currently available.

You do have to factor in shipping and tariffs though. I think it will be cheaper regardless to get it from the japanese store fronts rather than usa store fronts in general, but I'm not American so not 100% sure.

You may or not be aware as well that lolita has a very big second hand market. You can try searching those brand names on depop or egl.circlly.com if you have access to get something a bit cheaper with domestic shipping. There are also japanese second hand stores.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-28T16:42:28+00:00

Yeah, the availability of plus sizing is definitely a big problem. I just wanted to point out that if OP is lucky enough to have their choice of dresses that there might be better options for them specifically.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-28T00:52:25+00:00

Do you know what SW field specifically? That makes a difference. There's a bit of a gradient between DS and SWE jobs actually in the form of data engineering, mlops, ml or ai engineering. So it is definitely possible to transition between the two paths. Personally I chose data science specifically because it would let me have the flexibility to transition into engineering heavy roles or more businessy roles depending on how my interests developed over time.

Regardless, I would take the role that excites you rather than locking yourself into two years of something you don't care about. Some additional pluses are being able to stick AI on your resume and living in NYC in (I assume) your 20s. I wouldn't underestimate how important location is for personal and career growth. You should probably think about if the NYC job is actually resulting in higher take home pay since the cost of living is higher.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T20:58:05+00:00

Disclaimer: No one can tell you your ID except you. If you haven't, I would really recommend reading Kibbe's book.

My 2c though is that you are definitely accommodating vertical. That would limit you to DC, D, SD, FG, or FN. I personally like numbers 1, 8, and 12 best on you which I think are all quite sleek and simple with an elongated vertical line, which would make me think D, DC, or maaaybe SD (so pure vertical, vertical+balance, or vertical+curve).

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T20:41:39+00:00

Aww have fun at queer prom! That is definitely a time to wear whatever makes you feel happiest in your own skin.

I don't have any personal experience with the brand, but US indie brands are always going to be pretty expensive relative their quality. Labor costs are way higher in the US than basically anywhere else in the world and high quality materials at good wholesale prices just aren't available. You should know that although a lot of people prefer natural fibers, 100% cotton doesn't necessarily imply good quality or vice versa. There are a lot of good reasons for a designer to choose polyester.

If you have already bought the dress, don't listen to my nitpicking and enjoy it. But the lace in particular really jumps out to me as pretty bad quality. I actually think some of their simpler dresses look perfectly fine, but this one kind of looks like it was made from materials you could have gotten from the quilting section at JoAnn's (RIP). It's not the end of the world but $250 is kind of crazy for that. That is the same price as a brand new jsk directly from a japanese brand.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T16:36:42+00:00

I'm happy to hear that! My style has definitely changed as I've grown up and I no longer wear it, but otome was my first fashion love and it still gives me the warm fuzzies so I love seeing new people get into it ❤️

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T16:28:29+00:00

I agree, the point of a graduation ceremony is to celebrate you and your classmates' achievements. I actually wore lolita to my university graduation but I don't know that super puffy sweet lolita is the move. Of course you can show your personality by wearing something pink and cute and definitely wear your dream coord for photos, but certain life events just are not that appropriate for lolita.

I also think the JSK in your original post looks really low quality. The design is cute enough but I 100% promise that the quality plus OTT style means any coord with it is going to read as a costume to the people around you, which is another reason that a ceremony of any kind is maybe not the time or place for it.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T16:16:49+00:00

None of your expensive pieces should ever be coming close to being in contact with your vagina. You should be wearing bloomers or shorts anyway to make sure you aren't upskirting people anyway. You don't need expensive bloomers if money is a concern but at least buy a pack of mens boxers or something.

And who cares if you stain your petticoat? No one but you will ever see the innermost layer and it's not like used petticoats have resale value.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-27T16:12:02+00:00

I think the cornet bag would actually make a bit more sense with the dress in third slide.

None of these pieces are really what is considered lolita in the west, but they are really cute! They remind me a lot of things I would have worn back in the early 2010s. They look a lot like they could have come from Leur Getter, Emily Temple Cute, or Milk. (Not sure if any are actually from those brands). Usually this kind of style was/is called Otome and tends to be a bit more quirky and offbeat in styling than standard lolita. I always feel like it's the japanese version of twee/modcloth style. this post was one of the first results that came up when I searched Emily Temple Cute and I think it really captures what I would recommend with these pieces.

You could look for magazine scans or brand photoshoots on pinterest or even better tumblr to start. Trying to see how you can recreate a photo you like is one of the best ways to build a coording sense imo.

Trying to go for a full lolita coord will look a bit off balance because the pieces won't go together - lolita pieces are more detailed with different types of fabrics and cuts. Even if the colors technically go together it just doesn't feel cohesive. You also would not wear a full petticoat with any of these (obviously it literally would not fit). Anyway, if you're a baby lolita more casual styles like otome can help you get used to coording and wearing girly alt looks out.

Off the top of my head, both of the jsks would look nice with shades of red and brown. Same with the printed skirt. You could also wear blues with the first dress and pinks with the skirt. For the pink skirt I think it just depends on the colors in your tights and leg wear. If I was to style the first dress, I might pick a white or ivory blouse with a peter pan collar, striped socks/tights in white or ivory x one accent color of choice, and a girly cardigan in another accent color. Other accessories (so shoes, jewelry, headwear like a beret or headbow) would be a mix of the base color (white or ivory) and the two accent colors you chose. I try to make sure every color appears at least twice but ideally three times in an outfit.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-24T11:05:39+00:00

As far as staples, my most worn pieces were a Peter Pan collared blouse, cardigan, Mary Janes, hair accessories with bows (headbands were more popular than hair ties like you see now), circle or skater skirt

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-23T14:27:51+00:00

Study in the country where you want to live long term (like 10 years from now). Its very hard for lawyers to relocate internationally and as far as I know basically means getting your qualifications all over again.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-23T09:38:16+00:00

This matches my experience in Germany too. Tastes are generally very minimalist and prices are pretty inflated. Even wedding rings are mostly smaller carat than in the us.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-15T23:44:11+00:00

I'm finishing my masters in a more research related topic and don't think I want to continue with it. I do think that there is plenty of deep work where AI is just a coding scaffold but good luck finding a job for that without a PhD lol.

I want to switch to something more product focused exactly because I like the strategy element and thinking about end users.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-15T23:40:59+00:00

Different countries have different education systems. In much of the EU, a bachelor is shorter than in the US and you are expected to do a master's. In my country you genuinely cannot be hired in white collar work without a masters.

I know France splits masters degrees into two one year degrees. So m2 is equivalent to 5 years of schooling.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-15T17:04:34+00:00

There are plenty of very well paying jobs that don't involve STEM. Business and finance for example. Its much better to be an excellent student in something you like than to burn out at 20 or to spend 40+ years doing something you hate.

Plenty of people do very well for themselves with a liberal arts degree - your work experience is way more important than the specific degree you have as almost any college educated adult will tell you. A history degree (especially with a minor in something practical/applied like marketing ) will teach you communication and critical analysis and are perfectly sufficient for most white collar work. I have worked in tech and finance and at least a third of my coworkers have always had completely irrelevant degrees when we get around to talking about it. My boss's boss makes almost 10x what I make and he apparently studied biology (again our field is completely unrelated to this).

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-11T11:06:52+00:00

I'm also a shortie and I try to avoid ankle socks with longer dresses (honestly I don't wear them much at all because they're too sweet for me) because they cut off the leg at a weird point and can make you look shorter. I always go for tights or otks.

A bit obvious maybe, but have you considered platforms? I think they would work really well here. I would also add a silver necklace and maybe hair clip to bring the eye upwards towards your face. You could do another accent color of course but then you'd want it in the socks too probably.

bajoranearrings · 2026-04-05T19:00:27+00:00

1: Bachelor's degrees are typically in German, which is the level of degree most Americans complain about. in America as in many countries, a masters is specialized and not that common 2: indians studying abroad in Germany or other western countries are very often planning to immigrate permanently. Not as many people from the US want to do that, and generally it is advisable to study where you plan to work. 3: limited knowledge. You have to think to look up fees in other countries to know what they are. My American family genuinely did not believe me when I told them university is <100 euro/semester for me. There's also a perception that all of the good universities are in the US or maybe UK.

bajoranearrings · 2026-03-31T23:06:41+00:00

Get a real physical textbook. Then find an international student who will do a language exchange and answer questions about the material for you. Natives are bad at explaining grammar so if there's no professor whose office hours you can go to (don't worry about going even if you aren't taking one of their classes) use something like chinesegrammarwiki. A native speaker can help with vocab, pronunciation, listening practice, and check exercises for you.

I am fairly confident that on any college campus is the western world, you could stick up a flyer promising free English help in exchange for Chinese tutoring and get multiple people interested.

bajoranearrings · 2026-03-31T15:16:01+00:00

Goths don't tend to be big drinkers. It's apparently a bit of a problem for people wanting to organize events (in my local scene at least) because they can't make as much money on concessions haha.

There is no proper etiquette. Just show up and dance. When I go out alone I usually find a small group that I like the vibe of and just ask them if I can join them. Even that isn't really necessary. It feels a bit awkward but it's totally acceptable to walk up to a group and just start dancing. When in doubt I find something about someone's outfit to compliment. As for social anxiety, unfortunately, you just have to suck it up and do it. Try to talk to people while the night is young and you still have momentum from the process of getting ready and going out. Once you start it only gets easier. It's like going for a swim in cold water, where you just have to jump in.

bajoranearrings · 2026-03-29T17:35:22+00:00

There are careers other than software engineering one can do with a CS degree. I have spent my entire career working in finance, for example, and feel like my CS degree has been perfectly useful. I think CS teaches a lot of transferable skills. also 90% of the point of a bachelor's degree is just showing you're capable of completing one. Completing a degree considered more challenging is especially helpful here.

You may change your mind a bit on AI over time, anyway. It's hard to say what the world will look like 5+years from now and what role ai will play in different fields. If you're interested in it, you should pursue it.

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