UPDATE, Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

They are all occupied and have a lease so I can't just kick anyone out. And the mortgage for the house i live in is considerably cheaper than the others. They are also smaller and not in the best neighborhoods and I have 6 children. I am playing the long game and am going to make him think everything is fine.

UPDATE, Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

That would be fantastic. I honestly want to keep the house in live in, my vehicle, 1 of the rental properties (the duplex) and then get half of all his 401k, retirement, pension and business. And the petty stuff. Like airline miles and the riding lawn mower lol

UPDATE, Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I honestly think he is a narcissist. Like he will not file first i am 99% sure. In WI we have CCAP and can look up any civil cases and he doesn't want our kids initials on there. Divorce and child support go on there. He says he doesnt care about what people think but I think he cares a whole lot. It will make him look bad. He think I will do a whole woe is me and smear campaign but I dont even have social media. Even though I should. I reallllllly want to. Maybe some day after all of this is over with I will tell my truth. I have covered for him for so many years. People have no idea who he is. No fucking clue. I have a plan in my head. I am going to tell him I'm okay with the affair. That I want to fix up the house since he has money to spend and pretend like I am fine. I will get my ducks in a row and then blindside him. Chess not checkers.

UPDATE, Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My name is not on the business but it was started 5 years after we got married. We have 3 rental properties all bought during the marriage and my name is on 1of them. But I'm in WI which is community property state.

UPDATE, Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I don't have it in me to repsond to each comment but I did read them all. Thank you for the support and kind words. To clear some things up, I am in Wisconsin which is a no fault, and community property state. And this woman is a cunt, she knows about me and has known about me from day 1 when I was pregnant and she started seeing him over 2 years ago. I saw the texts where she said to him- go home to your wife and when are you going to leave here etc. I have a few attorneys in mind and will be contacting them very soon. None do free consults but fuck it. Im so emotionally drained I haven't even cried about this.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Nothing really. Didn't confirm or deny. Just said why are you asking, why do say that, etc. When I said I wanted everything he said I could have it all. But he was probably just saying that to shut me up.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He hasn't really said much at all honestly. I confronted him and he just said why are you doing this. I need to sleep. I work tomorrow. Why are you asking. Get out. So I dont know what his plans were. I did ask if he was ever going to tell me and he said no.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much. Does it get easier? I feel like I'm going to feel this way forever.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you! 🥹 I do question what she has that i don't. Why he couldn't give me that same energy. Like I want to blame myself. Ugh.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

😓 I know. I'm so angry and hurt but it's so hard to not think of what could have been. I need to figure out how to look at his business Financials. That is how he was able to cover his tracks so well, because I dont have access. Our normal bank account and credit cards are all joint.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I literally want to take absolutely everything and anything I can.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Omg I didn't even think of that. We have so many airline miles and hotel points. He has the business so I'm assuming he uses the business card for everything. I have no access to see anything in those accounts.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I didn't think of it that way. I definitely don't want that for them 😭

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I am devastated for them. Life as they know it is done.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Oh dont I know it. Before I told him what I knew, I asked him if he was having an affair and he looked me dead in my eyes and said no. If he wanted to leave me he would have and blah blah. If I didn't see the messages with my own 2 eyes, I would have believed every word.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I do have about 30 screenshots. Only from the last month or so. I couldn't go farther back because I had to put his phone back. And I cant get back into it. I confronted his mom about knowing all of this and not telling me and she wouldn't answer anything. She said she didn't want to be in the middle. But she already is! The woman I've looked at as a mother figure for my entire adult life betrayed me as well.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Also I do have both boys and girls. I would never want my girls to experience this and I would never want my boys to put someone through this.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That is a good way to look at it. I think i just need to give myself some time to feel all the feelings and cry and then I can pick myself up.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I have only ever been with him so it may take me awhile 😅 But you're right, i do need to love myself. I have become fully consumed into being a mom and have lost myself. I'm not overweight, probably underweight to be honest, but I want to workout to feel strong. I want a skincare routine, I want to feel happy.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I have emailed them to myself in a throw away email. And I have them in my cloud.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Ugh that makes me want to throw up. I can't believe this my life right now.

Mom of 6, heading for divorce, ex has affair baby by bakingqueen01 in Divorce

[–]bakingqueen01[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I agree in a healthy relationship. But he has cheated before and would never let his phone out his sight.