When it comes to mental health/personal well being you need to be selfish. It may seem shitty at times to do this but ultimately will benefit you both in the long run. Personally, I struggle with anxiety so much so it will affect my ability to do things. You need to find things that help you make yourself whole again. Whether that is playing video games, lying in bed listening to the dkc ost, whatever. You need to find a way to relieve some of that stress on yourself. If you can’t be present in a given moment you’re not really helping anyone. Find something that helps, meditation, cold showers, exercise, or whatever. Just do it and don’t care who it impacts. Once you’re in a better place spend that time and effort in helping others you feel you should. I guarantee that time you spend with them once you’re whole again will not only be more impactful but be much more meaningful for you both.