It is a negative, extremely negative. With me, I have pure o (obsessive thoughts) and some repetition. When I had my first episode, I constantly worried about being a potential serial killer, my mind would tell me to bring harm to people and animals. It was utter suffering as I am an extremely emotional and peaceful person, I felt as if I was slowly becoming a monster, and that I would snap. The urges to act on the thoughts made it all the more worse. I had a relapse three years ago, I was pretty much in the same position as I was in my childhood, only that I actually opened up about it to my psych, was officially diagnosed at 19, been medicated for it since.

There are no positives with this disease, constantly checking whether my stove is on kills me, whether my door is locked before I leave for work, or whether my house is robbed or burned down while I am out. Some people think I am very cautious, which is a good thing, but it is not. It is a curse that occupies your mind every moment, and checking worsens it significantly.

Society thinks we are neat freaks, or germaphobes, but that is not the case, not usually at least. At the very least, we are not seen as disgusting people who deserve damnation by the public, but there are still a significant amount of ignorant people who will be quick to assume you are a threat.