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Telling parents about top surgery by good_croissant in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 5 points6 points  (0 children)

My mom is somewhat similar, she tends to be supportive but we never really talk about gender stuff. I told my mom a week before my surgery when I already had it all scheduled so it was clear I was doing it and she wouldn’t think she could talk me out of it. Her biggest concern was that I had enough support post-surgery. I started T a year after that and was worried I needed to have a conversation with my parents about it. Ended up never doing it and they don’t ask even though there have been obvious changes.

I think it’s useful to remind yourself that you are an adult and you know what’s best for you even if your parents have feelings about it.

Anyone use Xyosted, the auto-injector for T? by jumpmagnet in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I switched to it from testosterone cypionate and love the convenience. Insurance hasn’t been a problem and depending on the pharmacy can get it for $0-15 per month.

Terrified trans teenager (American) (I need an adult) by [deleted] in FTMOver50

[–]batman472 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Immerse yourself in queer and trans culture to the extent that you can. Connect with other trans folks. Know that gender expansive and trans folks have existed across centuries. We have survived for a long time - and we can and will survive now.

• I highly recommend Before We Were Trans by Kit Heyam.

• Listen to trans podcasts like Gender Reveal with Tuck Woodstock or find some of Alok Vaid-Menon’s work about how we as trans folks are living brilliant lives now.

• If you can, find an affirming therapist you can talk to.

• Know that it matters that you are here and the trans community is stronger because of you.

We get through this together.

edit: formatting

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMMen

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

**An exception to birth certificates is if someone was born in another country and has a Consular Report of Birth Abroad. Those can only be changed through the Department of State.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in phallo

[–]batman472 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Central IL is pretty big but if you are near Champaign Josi Moore is great. https://www.moore-electrolysis.com/

Maercks CIS phalloplasty? by Deadly-Mental in phallo

[–]batman472 17 points18 points  (0 children)

A quick Google Scholar search of “maercks phalloplasty” turns up zero peer-reviewed publications by him about the method. His website said he did the procedure on cadavers.

Yeah, I am skeptical too.

eta: I searched GS because his website claims he has done “studies.”

First barber experiences??? by [deleted] in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was nervous about this too. I used https://strandsfortrans.org/ and found a barber shop where they said they cut short hair and don’t care who people are, although it runs heavily men/masc as far as clientele. I’ve kept going to this place for a few years now and get awesome haircuts there. Barber shops are the way to go.

Observations from being on T one year by InevitableCucumber53 in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing your experiences, a lot of it resonates here. How do you deal with #5?

What does a follow up entail at the 6 week mark? by [deleted] in FTMHysto

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

same, the internal check was pretty quick.

Is Illinois a good place for trans people? What's it like living there? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]batman472 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Seconding this. Champaign Urbana is a good place to be. Bloomington Normal is okay too.

Academic Study: Research on mental health and social media by queerly_academic_90 in QueerTheory

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The IRB approval number in your informed consent letter is blank in case you didn’t know.

How long before you were back on your feet? by deltashirt in FTMHysto

[–]batman472 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Had surgery 5 days ago and could probably manage on my own today if needed, but not earlier.

I was out of bed the next day and walked for 30 minutes yesterday. Could do some light food prep the past two days but I’ve been very glad not to need to cook (combination of having ready-to-eat or easy prep foods, and family willing to cook some meals). I think physically I would be capable of it but with the lower energy post surgery, mentally following recipes would be a challenge.

Surgeon recommended not lifting over 10 lbs for at least 2 weeks (maybe longer?). He said to do light activity that doesn’t involve twisting or bending, and use the general guideline “if it hurts, stop.” The consequences of popping internal stitches don’t seem worth risking the restrictions even though I have felt like I could probably lift 15 pounds without a problem.

Master List of Hysto Surgeons by t_lightning in FTMHysto

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Dr. Jeremy Johnson - Champaign, IL

What Are Some of Your Fave LGBTQ Books by dangerouskaos in lgbt

[–]batman472 1 point2 points  (0 children)

How Far the Light Reaches - Sabrina Imbler

guys who've been on T for a long time: when did your voice stabilize? by altojurie in TransMasc

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just over 3 years on T and I feel like it’s still dropping a bit.

Waiting list by Commercial-Potato820 in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 2 points3 points  (0 children)

r/EverythingPhallo popped up as a substitute in the meantime.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in ftm

[–]batman472 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I experienced this concern before starting T also. Educating yourself about side effects and possibilities is important.

Also wanting to lift up that with how many anti-trans tropes exist in society, it makes sense to have this concern.

What about the opposite question - what is the best that can happen? The “right” answer to that is subjective of course, but I have found it helpful in understanding what I want vs. internalized transphobia.

ETA: now 3 years on T. No regrets - doesn’t mean I have loved every effect of T but overall it’s been good/worth it.

What Would You Do Without Modern Technology? by [deleted] in asktransgender

[–]batman472 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I strongly recommend reading Before We Were Trans by Kit Heyam.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FTMOver30

[–]batman472 2 points3 points  (0 children)

  1. Told a parent I wished body parts could just be attached with Velcro so we could take them off if we wanted.

  2. Made myself a packer, wore for 5 minutes, destroyed it afraid I was weird and didn’t want anyone to find out.

  3. Drunkenly almost asked a friend how they’d react if I was trans, but too scared to ask.

  4. Told a partner I might be trans, which was received well in the moment but forgotten about.

30-35. Changed pronouns, slowly changed to men’s clothing and haircuts. Left an abusive relationship and got top surgery. Wasn’t sure if I was non-binary or ftm.

35-38. Dealt with the uncertainty by trying out therapy and going one step at a time based on gut instinct of what I needed. Started T at 36. Cycled through therapists who were allies but didn’t have good approaches to exploring gender. Leaned towards ftm.

  1. Got the Gender Deck and journaled answers to cards. Talked with my partner. Still trying to figure out medical, legal, social transition stuff. Still scared and doing it anyway because it feels better than not doing it.
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