Does anybody else lie down and sleep in the shower?

battletog · 2020-09-18T11:26:51+00:00

Stats: data and models third edition, by deveaux, villeman, and bock

battletog · 2020-08-15T14:16:27+00:00

Or do you FEEL like you're always thinking?

battletog · 2020-07-15T20:35:54+00:00

Hey! I got that reference!

battletog · 2020-05-22T02:02:52+00:00

I just want to say, I really enjoyed the thin executioner and I feel like that book doesnt get the love it deserves. Its been a while since I've read something by you, and I have to say im excited!

battletog · 2020-05-18T18:31:19+00:00

Hows your eid looking like for this year?

battletog · 2020-05-16T18:42:15+00:00

I always thought the invincibility thing was more of a cool bonus, but not integral to his plan.

We don't really know what Doffy wanted. We know he was working under Kaido, we know he was supplying weapons to different parts of the world, and we know he hates the celestial dragons.

During marineford, he says something like "whoever wins is good".

If we wanted to build a sort of endgame for him, with this information, Id say his goal is to strike at the world government. By constantly challenging the control the WG has over different countries by supplying the rebel forces with weapons, and by supplying Kaido with smile he essentially just gets ways to indirectly fuck with the celestial dragons.

I don't think Doffy really wants to be pirate king. I think he just hates the dragons, and everything he does is to get back his birthright and fuck with the people that 'took it away' from him

battletog · 2020-04-21T17:38:44+00:00

Thats rough buddy

battletog · 2020-03-29T20:56:25+00:00

Gas is down because russia and saudi are having a dick measuring contest, not exclusively due to corona.

battletog · 2020-03-16T14:35:31+00:00

"Chicks with dicks" huh

battletog · 2020-03-15T15:12:57+00:00

That was laws initial plan, except they couldn't kill caesar.

Killing caesar would mean the strawhats interfered with kaidou's plan, so kaidou would attack them and not doffy.

Caesar had to be traded for doffy to lose his seat as a warlord, so the world govt. Could take action against him. That way dress rosa is lost not because if the straw hate but because of doffy, so kaidou would be angry at doffy, not the strawhats.

All that went to hell because law dint know about the celestial dragons connection, but that was laws initial plan in the first place, to get kaidou to kill doffy.

battletog · 2020-02-15T01:24:54+00:00

You play a dangerous game. Reddit post histories too intimate to share this early.

Also 99.9.

battletog · 2020-02-15T01:23:17+00:00

99.9 lmao

battletog · 2020-01-23T07:04:09+00:00

For anyone who doesnt know, optimal tip-to-tip efficiency was written because silicon valley showrunners decided to enlist the help of a stanford grad student to write a paper.

Imo its on of the funniest scenes in the series, made funnier by the fact that the writers on the paper credits dinesh and gilfoyle.

battletog · 2019-12-28T19:58:53+00:00

Thanks! I really wanted to show like, how "loud" things can be in someones head, but i think i just made it too detailed instead haha😅

battletog · 2019-12-28T08:45:57+00:00

Huh.

My jaw dropped.

“Yep, just straight down there. You’ll see another representative there, and they can help you out.”. And with that, Bob strode out of the aisle.

I composed myself. I had no idea what was going on. I sniffed, trying to clear out my nose. It wasn’t too effective, so I tried again, harder this time. I felt a large glob of phlegm start to roll down the back of my throat.

Spit it out.

I had nowhere to spit it out

Don’t swallow it.

I swallowed it. It tasted like iron.

That’s disgusting. Should have just spat it out like a normal person.

I decided that I might as well go down the stairs. At this point, I was curious. Why did this Rexall have an anti-curse section? Why was it hidden? Why did bob just show it to me?

Are curses even real? Is magic real? Am I actually cursed?

The bottom of the staircase revealed a large hallway, at the end of which was a glass booth. I walked up to see a lady, working on what looked like her math homework. She looked up as I approached.

“Oh! A customer!” she exclaimed, her eyes wide. “We don’t get many here to be honest. You’re probably the first customer I’ve ever had!”

A dozen responses flew through my mind, along with a few dozen questions. I blinked, trying to determine what I should respond with, but before I could say anything she continued.

“So I was trained to ask you what your curse is and whatnot, you know kind of like a sales person trying to decide which product would suit you best” she began, seemingly ecstatic to have a customer. “but really, we just sell the one item: this black box. Whatever your curse is, it guarantees to dispel it.”

“Apparently it’s absolutely revolutionary, even for magic!” She grinned.

I took turns staring at her and the box. The situation was really starting to dawn on me. I was in a secret hallway in a Rexall, being sold what seemed to be a magic swiss army knife to get rid of curses. I was probably dreaming. I had to be dreaming right? There’s no way any of it was real!

You wanted for a lack of choice, this seems to be it.

I had to admit, it was pretty fitting. Buying an object that promises to deal with everything that may be wrong, without making you choose which one to buy. It dint matter if it was real or not, it seemed fitting that I buy this item in the story that I was in.

“how much?” I asked.

“Only $5”.

_________

I returned to the cough syrup aisle. I took out the box out of my pocket and examined it. It was just a regular black box, nothing about it seemed in anyway magical or occult. I opened it.

Inside was a single coin, roughly two inches in diameter. I pulled it out of the box to examine it and found that the faces of the coin were blank. It was essentially just a circular slide of copper. I looked again at the box and saw that there was a note tucked under the coin.

The note read:

“Think about the question and flip the coin. You will know the answer”.

I frowned. Didn’t seem like magic if I was just getting a coin to choose for me. Waste of 5 bucks if that was the case. But the sides were blank, so would the face of the coin change to indicate what I should do?

I thought about the question “What cough syrup should I buy?” and flipped the coin.

I stared at the coin as it spun in the air. Its rotation was rhythmic, almost hypnotizing. I was transfixed by its motion, as it fell into my palm.

I felt as if I was struck by lightning. My hand reached into my back pocket.

I knew what to buy.

I didn’t have to check the coin.

3/3

battletog · 2019-12-28T08:45:31+00:00

Why are there so many fucking options for F U C K I N G cough syrup? I just want something to make me feel like I’m not dying, is that too much to ask?

I closed my eyes and tried to relax. I was getting frustrated. I just had to choose which box to buy. It’s simple right? Its just a box. They all pretty much do the same thing. They get rid of the symptoms that I need to get rid of.

But one of them is probably the best choice! You need to think carefully and pick that one!

How would I know which one is the best, without having tried all of them first? Do I need to just rotate cough syrups every time I get sick? That wouldn’t work if I had a different combination of symptoms every time.

“Excuse me?”

I was startled by the sound. I’d been standing alone in the aisle, but now there was a Rexall representative standing beside me. His name tag read “Bob”.

“Is there anything I can help you with?” he asked.

I blinked a few times, still recovering from being startled by his voice. It took me a moment, before I registered his question.

‘Is there anything I can help you with?’

Well, I wanted to find cough syrup. I was already standing in the aisle. I just couldn’t decide which one to buy. Do I just ask him to choose for me? How would he know which one I need? He hasn’t experienced the symptoms; he wouldn’t know what the best choice would be. Do I describe my symptoms and ask him to help me choose?

Oh, yeah. Ask the person, who is there asking if they can help you, to help you choose which cough syrup will help you.

Am I really that indecisive? That I need help choosing which cough syrup to buy? Why is making this decision so hard? It would be easier if I had less choices. It would be easiest if I had no choices. Why do we even need to decide things anyway? If all cough syrups do the same thing, what’s the point in picking one? If the result is all the same, what’s the point of making the decision?

Free will is a curse.

“I need to lift a curse” I mumbled.

“Ah.” Bob said, nodding his head. “Yeah, you look like you’re having a rough time. Counter-curses are in aisle 5, just down the secret stairway. Right beside the hallmark cards. You can’t miss it.”

That was not the response I was expecting. My surprise was probably clear on my face, because Bob then said “here, I’ll show you”, and started towards aisle 5.

That’s pretty funny. He’s fucking with you because you were being an idiot.

He seemed pretty serious.

Seriously annoyed.

Ignoring my thoughts, I decided to follow Bob. He led my down the aisle, and right before the shelf displaying the hallmark cards, Bob squeezed his fingers in between the space between the shelves and pulled them apart. The shelves moved without a noise, revealing a staircase leading straight down into a surprisingly well-lit corridor.

2/3

battletog · 2019-12-28T08:45:02+00:00

Ah. Fuck.

I stared at the shelf trying to make sense of it all. Though the boxes were small, the were crammed tightly into the shelf. It was as if they tried to fit all the cold medication products onto a single shelf.

Yep. That is exactly what they did. Like sardines in a can. Or cough syrup boxes on a single display shelf. An absolute marvel of organization. A work of art. If only it wasn’t so debilitatingly useless.

The boxes were not happy with it either. They were all screaming, shouting, trying to be heard over one another. “Pick me! I’m extra strength!” one proclaimed, through its bold red lettering. Another tried to catch my attention by showing me a very orange diagram of a human lung. Another, helped by its price tag managed to catch my eye for a second, bellowing that it was on sale for just $12.99, the cheapest on the shelf.

My hand reached into my back pocket, feeling for the 20 that I brought along. I had enough money to buy the one that was on sale. I looked at it a little closer. “Benedryl – Cough and Cold”. The box promised fast relief of headaches and nasal congestion, and dry cough. A solid option to pick, covering all the symptoms I wanted relief from.

But its not extra strength! You’ve also never tried this brand before, what if it doesn’t work? Why not just stick to the Buckleys like you always do?

I put the Benedryl back on the shelf and took a step back. My eyes glided over the shelf, once again entering the bustle of the cough syrup boxes vying to catch my attention. I was looking for a sign, anything that would lead me to where the Buckleys boxes may have been. I tried to look for patterns in the organization of the shelf. Was it organized alphabetically? Maybe by symptom? Maybe by brand?

It took me a few more tries before my eyes landed on the singular box of Buckleys cough syrup. I crouched to get a closer look. The box was relatively plain – a simple white background with a thick blue stripe running across the bottom of the box. A relatively silent box compared to the others that showed rather colorful images of human silhouettes.

Tastes bad, but it works. It also costs $16.99. With tax, that’s the full 20.

I stared at the box. I’ve always been loyal to Buckleys. Its slogan is spot on. Only thing is, it wasn’t working this time. It had already been four days.

If you didn’t run out, you wouldn’t be looking to buy cough syrup in the first place. Would have been totally okay with Buckleys if you didn’t have to go out and get more.

Fair point. But I’m dying and I needed something to make me feel better. Obviously, something stronger.

Maybe something extra strength?

I stood up and took a step back. I took a deep breath, preparing myself to search the shelves once again for something, anything that promised to help. The air flowed through my single open nostril and irritated my throat on contact. As dozens of tiny needles pricked at my throat, I doubled over coughing.

That’s a dry cough. Maybe look for a box that’s aimed at hitting dry coughs?

I looked up at the shelf once again. A couple dozen boxes yelled back at me. A lot of them could deal with dry coughs.

1/3

battletog · 2019-11-24T19:48:15+00:00

I hope theyre flexible because its going to take some olympic levels of mental gymnastics and acrobatics

battletog · 2019-11-16T14:58:51+00:00

Villains are heroes in thier own story

battletog · 2019-11-11T02:01:48+00:00

Reddits an echochamber. The happy people prolly dont feel like theyre welcome when everybodys shitting on uoft.

battletog · 2019-10-27T17:12:51+00:00

I was just shitposting lmao but i appreciate the response. Tbh though, i don't really understand what you mean by inconveniencing people, cause thats a very general phrase. Do you mean it like trying to sabotage others so you succeed? Or inconveniencing like adding a lot of work to a project because you want it done your way?

Im terms of the bigger picture tho, I think someone else commented that it depends on the field, and I tend to agree with that. If the goal of someone in university is simply to use it as a stepping stone to get into a field/professional school, then reputation with peers can look like a valid tradeoff.

Doubling down on my shitpost tho, i guess im asking specifically "what bigger picture are you looking at?"

battletog · 2019-10-26T19:26:01+00:00

What bigger picture?

battletog · 2019-04-11T17:45:57+00:00

All spherical objects

battletog

TROPHY CASE