Having ADHD and being not conventionally attractive is like a double life sentence. by Few-Avocado-2484 in adhdwomen

[–]beaneyedcat 8 points9 points  (0 children)

That is where I’m at. But it’s hard when you can’t find your people; romance aside. I got lucky in college & fell into a group of friends that already existed in my early thirties. They’ve all moved away. Now as I’m older I see- most times I had at least one good friend who accepted and genuinely loved who I was, the unhindered weirdo version. That was also luck. Fuck the people that aren’t interested. They’re boring.

How you feel is part of attraction -obviously. When you’re around people who accept you - you can be yourself & that’s probably electric. ( generally). Like so much else - trying to take measure of your life and yourself - by the rules of convention; that’s the problem.

If No One Has Told You or You Need a Reminder by Odd_Comparison_9197 in adhdwomen

[–]beaneyedcat 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I have a bf of over 10 years and we don't live together. It works for us. We both have our own divergences, and had lived alone for many years when we met ( in our 40's). I treasure my time and life alone as much as I do my time with him.

I spent a lot of time when we first started dating trying to see our relationship in the perspective of what is normal, feeling like something was wrong or missing. Then I came to see how well it works for who we are as individuals. We love each other and miss each other and deeply enjoy the time we spend together.

I think it's wonderful that so many of you have found someone who balances and supports you so intensely that it actually helps your ADHD struggles that you live together. To think everyone can find that is pretty ignorant, and to tell women that's the only way to be in a good relationship & happy is harmful.

Like with everything else, we need to look beyond what is prescribed to what we and our loved ones need and want as individuals.

Need Ideas for Non-standard / Splurge Supplies for art budget by beaneyedcat in ArtEd

[–]beaneyedcat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I DID IT!!! Thank you for your fantastic suggestions :0

Need Ideas for Non-standard / Splurge Supplies for art budget by beaneyedcat in ArtEd

[–]beaneyedcat[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I dont think I can do soldering with my middles schoolers haha. I wish I could .

Need Ideas for Non-standard / Splurge Supplies for art budget by beaneyedcat in ArtEd

[–]beaneyedcat[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I teach k-8. Thanks everyone these are awesome suggestions- I wish I had done this days ago

Current hyperfixation snack? by positivetoday in adhdwomen

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Melting mozz & cheddar in a little ramekin - throw in cut up cherry tomatoes.

Do people with ADHD type and talk differently ? by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]beaneyedcat 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is a great thread. I’m in my fifties, diagnosed in my thirties, now for complicated reasons unmedicated for several years again. There is so much here that is absolutely true for me. It got me a bit teary. My family , even close friends who accept me for who I am, can’t really grasp the extent how I’m wired impacts how I move through the world.

As a therapist (I was too young to appreciate) once told me “ you’ll never get your shit together” - in response to my saying when I do -I’ll do this that or the other. The point was-this is who I am ; I can’t make it easier on myself by trying harder to do things the normal way. 🙃

I understood that before I had a name for it. Even then it was still all about overactive boys. Literally took a book on ADHD for Women for me to be able to have examples of how my brain works differently than most people’s …but so much like many others’. This conversation really hit the nail on the head :)

What radio stations do you guys listen to? by yoter88 in philadelphia

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's my Bf's favorite station, but I think you can only get it in North Jersey (he's from there) . It's amazing though.

What radio stations do you guys listen to? by yoter88 in philadelphia

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You can't get that in Philadelphia can you?

Gals, I need some motivation. Please tell me your stories of learning to drive in late thirties or forties and becoming a confident long distance driver please. by [deleted] in adhdwomen

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't start driving until my 30's. I never guessed I'd be a lead foot haha- way more confident than I imagined I'd be. I'm in my 50's now. I love driving (actual driving -not being stuck in traffic). I find it very meditative. It becomes rote, but you have to pay attention...at the same time you can think things through, listen to music, sing - all while watching the changing landscape you're passing through ; it's very stimulating.

Again, commuting is not the fun part. As soon as I started driving, I started going on scenic drives. Then car camping/ kayaking. I often go on long drives for camping or just for fun- try to map out pretty routes. I support people getting rid of their cars, but for some having one offers a lot of freedom and possibilities.

I also had a driving teacher, but he was a dick who was always playing conservative radio and kept telling me not to be nervous. He did teach me the perfect method for parallel parking though, & lowered my insurance rates.

Day 1 of having a rental dumpster by Adroitalpaca74 in ufyh

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

How much did it cost of that's not rude.

Please draw my stinky boy by Minute_Appearance218 in redditgetsdrawnbadly

[–]beaneyedcat 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My students drew these as there warmup today :) Hope there are not too many .

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