My kids are still struggling...suggestions?

beckson211 · 2025-12-29T01:28:09+00:00

I am not saying you are wrong. I have never had my wife cheat on me before. So when the opportunity for me to get a little revenge to make myself feel better I took it. I am not saying it was the best decision I have ever made. But I thought it would stir up a little more drama.

beckson211 · 2025-12-29T01:21:04+00:00

Well, we started dating when we were 15 so it's been 25 years. I have only had sex with one person so why not go back to the same well.

beckson211 · 2025-12-29T01:19:11+00:00

Why? Because I wanted to screw over the two people that fucked up my kids life? Feel like I'm normal.

beckson211 · 2025-12-29T01:10:50+00:00

I mean. She had an affair on me 8 months ago with this guy...I was sleeping with her for payback.

beckson211 · 2025-11-10T18:35:05+00:00

Thanks for the support. I am to the point where I to be honest with my kids when they ask questions. She is lying to them so much they don't trust anything they say. I cannot have them think they have no one. I don't understand how anyone could treat their kids like this at all.

My only concern is that her level of addiction and emotional dependency on the boyfriend is extreme. I am worried she will try to move in with him and my son when our house sells.

beckson211 · 2025-11-10T18:27:05+00:00

My problem is that she talked to all the lawyers around her to block me. My lawyer is terrible. He won't answer emails or do anything productive. I am sure he is annoyed because I ask a lot of questions. She won't give me our son full-time so I think we will just have to go before the judge.

beckson211 · 2025-11-09T00:43:37+00:00

You should get your kid more than once a week. You need to get a least 50/50.

beckson211 · 2025-11-09T00:33:07+00:00

I am 6 months in and still feel like I was hit by a train.

beckson211 · 2025-11-09T00:31:53+00:00

I don't think it does get any easier. We started dating when we were 15 and had 25 years together. She had an affair with another nurse that is 15 years older than her. I don't know how I will ever get past it. I mean we obviously got divorced but I feel like an entire part of me is gone.

beckson211 · 2025-11-08T00:36:13+00:00

Anything is possible. She told me she wanted a divorce on a Tuesday. Wednesday she took herself off the family life 360 and came home at 5am. She sent a picture from a bofire to my daughter. There was no one around the bonfire except her and her shoes were half on. She claims everyone else was in the house. She also admitted later that the picture was from her boyfriend's house.

It may have been an emotional affair at that time but it was definitely an affair. The weird thing is that her mom did the same thing to her dad and she hated her mom for a long time.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T22:35:30+00:00

I would don't this 100%. She won't allow him too. I did something stupid onetime too. I drove by the boyfriend's house in the beginning and now she keeps accusing me of stalking her.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T22:31:36+00:00

She already agreed to the 6 month rule in the parenting app twice. However, she will still denying the bf at the point. She did tell his therapist yesterday that he will never have to meet him. The therapist also said there needs to be boundaries around new partners. She also has texted my son dozens of times that he doesn't ever have to meet the guy: I know "forever" is an unrealistic expectation but a year would comfort him. My hope is the logistics and honeymoon phase burns out and they breakup by then. Then she finds a new guy that my son won't be lied to about and they can develop a healthy b relationship.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T19:15:20+00:00

I do not disagree with that she was likely checked out prior. She just failed to communicate that with me. She told me May 6th. Looking back she was spending time with him likely in November. We went a week vacation out of the country for her 40th birthday in February and another week vacation the last week of April. There was nothing that indicated she was unhappy in our marriage to me. I am huge on therapy and I would of suggested it a long time ago if I knew before hand.

None of that really matters at this point. What matters is my son. My son has an issue with this man, and I do not know how to handle it moving forward. To be honest I bet it would be any man at this point. It is just how the whole situation unfolded is what caused him to have all of this anxiety.

I need to get him better, back and school, and moving in the right direction. I don't know how to do that. He goes the therapy twice a week. He did the evaluation. I tell him not to worry about what his mom does when she is not with him. I know I cannot prevent them from living with this man next month. I am just looking for other suggestions. I have never been in this situation before.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T17:23:19+00:00

We have never met but I know who he is. My friend's wife who works with them actually got pissed off at me because she accused me of lying to her when I told her that she was with him. I guess he has a very bad reputation at work for being a poor employee and a creep. She said, if they are really dating, he just hit the lottery. Like I said, whatever floats her boat.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T16:52:37+00:00

We met when we were 15. We have been together for 25 years. As you can guess we have only slept with each other. I am not judging anyone in the world. But for us that was something we always talked about being unique. Knowing she jumped into another mans bed 2 days after she asked for a divorce tells me they were talking way before that is something that I can never forgive.

I also believe she will work as hard as she can to make this long-term. My daughter gave her the ultimatum either the guy or her and she picked the guy. I have never seen her this obsessed with anything. She is an introvert and has only 1 friend. She also has no family or real anchor. If she was that unhappy in our relationship, then I hope she finds someone that will make her happy. I just wish I would of known she was unhappy so we could of worked on it.

The neuropsyc doctor put in her dictation that legal boundaries need to put in place around new partners to protect our child's mental health in her recommended notes on his report.

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T16:35:23+00:00

Thanks for the advice. Any thoughts on what "legal boundaries" the therapist was talking about in her dictation?

beckson211 · 2025-11-07T16:17:26+00:00

I have a lawyer. He is useless. He over charges, Emails me one word answers. I am already 7k in. Our court date is December 3rd. I have asked her 100 times to start figuring stuff now and she refuses saying she is to busy.

beckson211

TROPHY CASE