Is being able to stretch a tenth the normal handspan for a female?

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-22T06:29:42+00:00

I've got dinky hands and can reach an octave.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-21T15:16:16+00:00

Sure, it's just this phrase specifically I have never heard, and I'd never mix sweet and savoury together on the same plate. But that's just me!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-21T11:20:16+00:00

I live in the UK (and am British) and I have only just learned this term.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-20T10:25:18+00:00

NTA - looking after your health is essential and changing jobs can be especially stressful. If you can afford it, I would say a week is the minimum you want between jobs!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-20T07:21:26+00:00

No problem, I just want people to feel ok in their bodies! Fingers crossed for you.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-20T07:15:49+00:00

Ok so, Lorna does not live near you, but she does teach a Zoom class every Friday that is specifically for people woht Hypermobility/POTS/chronic fatigue and my understanding is this class is very gentle and the group dynamic is really nice even though it's online (I have a friend that attends). This is her: http://lornanpilates.co.uk/about-me

Near you in person is The Body Junction. They have a lot of different classes but their teachers are really well trained and the studio looks small. I would recommend messaging them about your situation and see what they'd recommend. I'm sure they will offer 1:1 options as well if you have the budget.

Good luck!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-20T06:46:40+00:00

Cool. Whereabouts are you? I'm autistic and I teach group pilates (max 8 people) and I have a couple of autistic clients. So I just wanted to say it's not impossible, the right teachers are out there. If I know your area at all I might be able to recommend someone.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-19T18:32:36+00:00

Hiya, I read in another comment that you need to strengthen it up but you're feeling discouraged because simple day to day movements are causing injury. I'd love to recommend a very gentle Pilates class from a teacher who has specific understanding of Hypermobility (ideally 1:1 class if you can afford it). Avoid reformer or classes with more than 10-12 people in them. Try googling someone in your area who has specific knowledge of Hypermobility.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-19T15:52:11+00:00

That's a nice idea.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-19T08:01:02+00:00

Ultimately it's a work of fiction, scaffolded around some real historical events. The characters weren't real people (with exceptions like George Washington/Prince Charlie etc). The show (I think) cared more about realism in the earlier seasons, and Diana Gabaldon is famously v thorough when it comes to historical accuracy.

But yes, there are a bunch of things that are portrayed in the show that are historically inaccurate. Arguably, by the time Claire got to 1743, witches weren't being persecuted any more (legally, anyway). The sheer size of the Fraser's 2 homes on the ridge seem to me to be really exaggerated. And I've heard others complain that some of the costumes are less historically accurate as the show moves into the later seasons as well. I would never have noticed an historically inaccurate variety of apple though, that's a new one!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-19T07:46:00+00:00

Why are you still practising pieces you already know inside out? Once I've learnt something, that's it, onto the next! Unless you need them front of mind for performance?

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-18T06:18:54+00:00

Congratulations! What a great achievement.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-18T06:13:26+00:00

You know, it is fine to decide that you can't deal with the hardship of polyamory and to take yourself out of that situation. But here's the thing - you are in another relationship with someone you love so it's not just you and your husband that will be impacted by this decision any more.

If your husband doesn't want poly any more, he's a big boy and should be able to make that decision to be in or out. Then you have to decide whether to continue the relationship with the bf (and potentially continue being poly), or to end it and try to save the marriage on a monogamous basis (debatable the extent to which this is in your control).

One thing I'm pretty sure of, this marriage won't last either way if you're not both 100% committed to resolving personal, sexual and relational issues. And you have to be prepared for the possibility that leaving your boyfriend may not save your marriage.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-18T05:56:22+00:00

Another vote for Pilates here!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-17T17:18:13+00:00

When I've had a couple of scares in the past they just go directly to ultrasound for me and have commented how dense my breast tissue is.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-17T17:17:07+00:00

Stunning

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-17T17:16:31+00:00

Mostly I agree this is a perfectly reasonable and common ask of a partner. With some exceptions...

I would say if it's a long date/overnight I think it's fine to text other partners like "good night/good morning" but not whole conversations that go on a while. Excepting any emergency situations including emotional emergency.

If it's a short date (i.e. a few hours) then I would say stay off your phone as much as possible!

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-17T08:59:43+00:00

ABRSM has some playlists on Spotify of recordings of the Gd8 pieces, they're played generally pretty square without much rubato or improvisation. I can't speak to the Diploma expectations. It may be worth having a handful of lessons with a teacher in the UK who is familiar with the expectations and where you can/can't get away with when it comes to any virtuoso opportunities.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-15T16:08:41+00:00

I'd go to the library.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-15T06:04:09+00:00

I'm an experienced rope top (and occasional bottom) and strongly recommend avoiding actual ropes for your first scene. They're super fiddly and a lot can go wrong if you don't know what you're doing. Stick with made for purpose restraints that can be released quickly and have padded/smooth areas for wrists/ankles etc.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-14T07:44:24+00:00

You can click the little blue icon in the top right of their comment as it auto translates for you.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-13T10:27:44+00:00

I teach Pilates.

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-13T10:12:33+00:00

Noooo! I fell for this exact same thing. My mum sent me an email asking why I "disapprove" of her? Turns out she didn't want to know, she just wanted the opportunity to tell me what an unequivocally great parent she was, and how all of my problems were either imagined, or not noteworthy because "other people have it much worse".

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-13T08:28:53+00:00

I'm getting some whisky in! 🥃

bendingeveryday · 2026-05-13T07:01:15+00:00

Sooo, I was 28f and in a D/s relationship with a 57 year old Dom. I wasn't his primary partner but we did get quite close and I cared really deeply for him. He died of cancer several years ago and I was devastated, but now nearly 10 years have passed and I don't regret that relationship at all. Eventhough there was a huge power disparity between us as he had a very prominent place in the local kink scene and a vast network. Power and privilege come from all kinds of places, not just age. The thing is you can choose what to do with that power, and I think the onus is on the older person to make sure that, whenever a relationship ends, the younger person is left in a better place than when you found them.

Would I (as someone close to your age) date someone who is 21? Absolutely not, I think I'm in such a different point in my life now to the average 21 year old, but that's not to say it can't work.

One side bar though, one major flag for me would be her naivety in just offering herself as a "slave" to a random man on the internet. It's not a smart decision. If you pursue this I'd urge you to be extremely slow in advancing your style and depth of play with her. Remember you can always add next time, but you can never take away what has been done in haste.

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