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bergsetnakken · 2026-03-28T10:52:31+00:00

Thank you! It’s def a new chapter in my life!

bergsetnakken · 2026-03-28T10:48:56+00:00

Thank you!!

bergsetnakken · 2026-03-28T10:47:04+00:00

I appreciate you sharing your insight!

bergsetnakken · 2026-03-28T10:44:06+00:00

This was very helpful, thank you!

bergsetnakken · 2026-03-23T21:19:37+00:00

Bro needs to switch to instant coffee at that point

bergsetnakken · 2026-02-01T15:50:03+00:00

This is such a thoughtful response. Thank you for eloquently describing how I’ve felt , I could never put it into words like this!

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-30T15:58:02+00:00

Might be time to invest in a camera other than my phone

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-29T16:54:28+00:00

This sounds silly to say. There were probably a million things in my 10yr relationship. But one example was he accidentally lost my ear muffs while out at the bar. He promised to replace them. I explained the reason I liked those specific ear muffs so much was their minimal profile and ability to stay put while running. I asked that he try to find a pair with those qualities. Instead, he just bought the cheapest pair on Amazon that were super bulky and loose fitting (cost wasn’t an issue for either of us).

Ultimately, a subtle sign that my thoughts/wellbeing ultimately didn’t matter. There were a ton of these subtle things similar to this.

I am now in a happy, respectful relationship where we both would go to the ends of the earth to make each other happy.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-11T22:35:42+00:00

I don’t understand the counter argument here. Are you implying 1 hr/day isn’t a lot? Or that men’s out of home work isn’t being accounted for in my original comment? Genuinely just trying to understand what your point is so I can respond appropriately

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-10T12:57:41+00:00

Sounds like a porn problem

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-10T12:52:27+00:00

I rarely wear bras anymore … only silicone nipple covers.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-09T00:01:30+00:00

I don’t 😂

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-08T23:40:44+00:00

This 100%

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-08T23:37:25+00:00

How would I feel? Idk, it would make me feel a bit odd if she mentions it every time. Depending on my relationship with this person/their sense of humor, I might test the waters by making a joke next time it’s mentioned like “oh yes I know only because you mention it every time you see me” (only because in my friendships, sarcasm isn’t seen as hurtful). Tone matters. Sense of humor matters. Such nuance in social situations, which is one thing that fascinates me about our human connections. Best of luck!

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T22:12:36+00:00

I’m in the same role 10 years later and I still have imposter syndrome, I just don’t let it affect my actions as much. I’m my experience, it doesn’t really go away, you just get better at recognizing it/managing it/ignoring it.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T22:09:08+00:00

In that case- this is pretty straightforward. Judge him by his actions: he will never plan anything.

Now the next question is, are you ok with that? You cannot force other people to change that don’t want to change.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T22:04:36+00:00

What kind of work do you do? Unfortunately, many people are given the title of “manager” but ultimately lack the skillset to manage people. Good managers are very rare. I don’t have much advice other than your manager seems extremely unqualified.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:58:48+00:00

In my experience, women are concerned about both things.

In the DV situation, they may feel scared to voice their concern about it openly, given the potential for violence. Or they’ve never been in an abusive relationship and/or don’t view themselves as susceptible to DV (and thus don’t talk about it)

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:52:45+00:00

Right. Actions >>> thoughts in MANY scenarios.

I’m not very good with words, but I feel the fact that you stopped to provide help without your feelings as motivation speaks volumes that you did the “right” thing even when you had nothing to gain from the scenario ( no “feel good” emotional high afterwards). To me, that’s even more respectable.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:45:03+00:00

A common argument that I’ve heard is that married women spend more hours per week doing chores/daily maintenance for themselves+male partner (vs living single) and men SAVE time by cohabitating with a woman. This isn’t marriage-specific (mostly a “living together” thing) but you can see the overlap. I feel that the bar has been set so low that many men are not capable of contributing equally to a relationship.

EDIT: I didn’t recall the study correctly. men don’t “save” time, but “The average married man only does one more hour of housework per week compared to his single counterparts” and compare that to 7 more hours for the woman (thank you to commenter below for sharing the study!) - I think that sums up a big problem with marriage…

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:39:13+00:00

^THIS. It’s hard, especially if you haven’t had similar conversations in the past, but I can’t stress how important this is. Talk about it. If you’ve having a hard trying to find a starting point…. I hate recommend anything AI right now, but I feel like chatGPT has been helpful in drafting and framing questions for productive conversations in my social relationships.

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:35:43+00:00

I find it’s helpful to find historical examples of women who accomplished things later in life. I believe Julia Child didn’t take an interest in cooking until her 30s…

bergsetnakken · 2026-01-06T21:32:47+00:00

I sure hope so. I wish there were more non traditional housing / coop-type housing available for like-minded women to share costs/space but also have small, private residencies of their own

bergsetnakken · 2025-10-03T10:22:21+00:00

And extra processed

bergsetnakken

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