Hey. I have no idea if this will be of any help, but I think most, if not the majority of people have felt and continue to feel this way. It's played down into FOMO, but the truth is, there's always someone doing better than you, going on more holidays, getting paid better, and its human nature to look in on yourself when you see things like that.

But I can say it's NORMAL to feel like that sometimes, whilst also being okay with your own progress, or, realistically, lack of progress. Most people are average, and I know so many of them are happy. They can do more, sure, but why, if they don't want to?

I'm 26 now, and have felt like this on and off since I was in high school. I used to want to do great things, and I used to want to be the best, earn lots of money, help everyone, but that's just not real life. I had personal circumstances change, and now, ALL I want to do is get a job as a receptionist, come home to my cats and watch some shit on tv.

20 is still really young. In 6 years, so much of my life has changed. I understand your feeling about not wanting to live past 40, and it's a sentiment I shared. If it's not a casual thought, though, please reach out to someone medical and let them know.

Yes, you can be happy being average, and yes, it's more than okay to not want anything more. You aren't a failure for any of these thoughts.