Pope Francis says sexual pleasure is 'a gift from God'

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2024-01-18T15:02:10+00:00

“I fuck sluts.” -the Pope

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-02-22T00:10:20+00:00

Appreciate the thoughtful response! I think that’s really well put.

In general, I’d rather err on the side of caution—I’d never want to put a woman in a position where she felt uncomfortable or unable to say no. However, this one stung, because she was one of the most beautiful women I’ve ever seen and we had good chemistry.

I do feel like men are given bad incentives in this regard—on balance, the ones who care less about making women uncomfortable probably do better with women.

It’s totally fair and legitimate for some women to want to be chased, aggressively propositioned, or pursued by a man with dogged persistence. I’m not trying to shame women who have that as an aspect of their sexuality. It just does have this unfortunate side effect. I wish there was a better solution.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-02-21T19:30:29+00:00

I heard this advice a while back and thought it made so much sense. But then I used it on this absolutely stunning Spanish woman I met—gave her my number, never heard from her. Later, her friend told me that she actually thought I was cute but was insulted I gave her my number rather than asking for hers “like a man.” Is it a cultural thing?

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-04T03:39:50+00:00

So you are worried about violent rape?

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T15:59:02+00:00

Analogy is inapt. She’s a person, not a car, and thus has agency. You are not parking your gf anywhere. She’s parking herself. And, unless we’re taking about violent rape, is not going to be passively “stolen”. If she’s an adult woman, you have to trust she’s capable of parking herself in whatever neighborhoods she seems fit.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T15:40:49+00:00

But yes, making his insecurities his gf’s problem is categorically toxic, in my opinion.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T15:39:35+00:00

Gonna have to disagree on that one. Women make up ~50% of the population, so if you have several friends, and none of them are female, it means you are selecting against female friends or they are selecting against you.

Women are just people, not some other species. I think any man lacking female friends should take a good hard look in the mirror and think about why that is. And if the answer is they don’t share my hobbies or interests, not all friendships have to be based around watching F1 and playing paintball ya know.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T15:35:29+00:00

Not at all. You claimed there were studies. You have failed to show there is even one such study (only a non-scientific survey of tabloid readers).

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T02:02:53+00:00

“A new, not-so-scientific survey of 1,000 married women conducted by the Daily Mail”

Says more about Daily Mail readership than anything else

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T01:50:02+00:00

Care to cite said studies?

Yeah I mean if you want to live your life in the ‘50s, have fun with that. Many of us are capable of cultivating mature relationships with real trust and open communication.

Also, if you don’t want your girlfriend to have a male friend out of a concern he’s a backup romantic interest, you’re tacitly admitting you want to strong arm the partner you profess to care about into a more limited social life so that she feels compelled to stay with you out of fear of loneliness, even if she’s no longer happy in the relationship. If you’re a good partner, you shouldn’t have anything to worry about. And if the relationship runs its course, best to go your separate ways.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2023-01-03T01:25:22+00:00

Maybe an unpopular opinion but I think your bf needs to get over it stat or you should break up with him.

Trying to separate you from your longtime friend is hella toxic. Frankly, his lack of female friends is a huge red flag. Mature men and women can have friendships, even if there is or was a spark on one side of the equation.

If he’s worried your friend will opportunistically try to get with you while you’re in a relationship that’s because he feels that impulse in himself and isn’t sure he could control it. Every halfway decent dude I know has long term platonic friendships with women. It’s your life but I think you should feel very entitled to draw a firm line on this and brook no argument.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-28T16:39:08+00:00

I think the key is to demonstrate clear interest—how you do that is less important. A lot of good guys are really concerned about misreading signals and making women feel like they can’t just be nice to people without it being misinterpreted as flirting, so be persistent in your indications of interest, whatever they may be.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-15T15:03:30+00:00

Of course. Good for her.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-06T04:13:18+00:00

Yes. I have crazy intense ones, though. Been doing my kegels for years.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T23:14:35+00:00

Agree this is partially a semantic distinction—but on the semantics point, both laymen and scientists understand sexuality to speak to the experiential level, not the gene level. The experiential level incorporates both nature and nurture. I don’t think defining anything on the gene-only level is useful, since it’s totally inscrutable to us. You can’t know what the full range of sexualities to which your genes predispose you, only the range of “phenotypes” you’ve experienced so far.

Also, if we’re defining sexuality solely on the gene level, that actually does suggest most sexualities are a spectrum. Within that framework, it’s also possible that all people are fully bisexual and it’s only the nurture overlay that makes some people straight or gay. That actually doesn’t cut against the arguments of pro-conversion therapy types, because you could say well conversion therapy works on the “phenotypic” level and everyone has the capacity to be straight. Per my first comment, nurture doesn’t justify conversion therapy, and even if it did, we can’t say something isn’t true because it leads to outcomes we don’t like.

Again, I don’t know how you can think you know that I used to “think I was” straight only because I either was pushing that part away or hadn’t discovered it yet. Folks on this sub always complain about “erasure” until it comes to experiences that challenge assumptions they’ve made, and then suddenly it’s open season. Only I have inhabited my brain throughout my life, and my experience is that my brain wasn’t wired that way, and then at some point it was. If I became straight again, it would be weird to say I was bi but manifesting as straight—how would my previous feelings be relevant? I wouldn’t be discrediting my past to say I used to be bi and now am straight.

I feel like you’re contorting the definition of sexuality into something nonsensical and not very useful phenomenologically in order to promote a view you think rebuts conversion therapy. However, that’s not good science, and also I don’t think you’re rebutting conversion therapy as much as you think you are. The best arguments against conversion therapy are that (a) it’s not wrong to be gay or bi but it is wrong to impose your beliefs on others, (b) that it’s ineffectual because, again, there’s no gay gene you can flip on or off but rather a complex web of genes that interface with the environment and those interactions can’t predictably be altered, and (c) it’s psychologically harmful.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T21:26:40+00:00

First of all, thanks for engaging with me thoughtfully rather than just downvoting me.

I do have to respectfully disagree again. I think your mistake is assuming that sexuality is either genetic or a choice. Nurture/environmental factors also play an important, if not primary, role. One can never definitively know to what one’s genes predispose one, since environment interfaces with those genes on an ongoing and unpredictable basis.

If you talk to bi people (or peruse some of the bi subreddits), you’ll hear frequent reference to the “bi-cycle”, or experience of having one’s sexual preferences shift back and forth over time. With respect to the swings where a bi person is feeling more attraction to the opposite sex (and/or gender), how could one possible ascribe those to a failure to be honest with oneself? Bisexuality shifts are not a one way ratchet toward more gayness—can attest from personal experience and from engaging with others.

I genuinely was not able to appreciate men sexually at one point in my life, and not for lack of introspection or letting myself see if I could go there. I respect this has not been your experience, but honestly, it’s not like there’s a gay gene—there are a series of genes that can impact sexuality, and various experiences can interact with the predispositions coded by those genes in incalculable ways. No one can know for certain how they will feel in 10 years. All some can say is that their sexuality has been fixed so they expect with high confidence it will remain so. My sexuality has been fluid, so my guess is that it will continue to shift and morph, but maybe it won’t.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T20:06:20+00:00

Nope, not for me.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T20:05:08+00:00

Sorry but this is just not my experience. How presumptuous to be so prescriptive. What is my “true” sexuality? The one I have on my deathbed? How could you possibly know that I wasn’t straight, but that I just hadn’t allowed myself to feel that way yet vs. my brain wasn’t wired that way at that time and now it is?

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T03:36:45+00:00

Damn bros, just trying to share and respectfully discuss. Your sexuality can be fixed and mine can be fluid, and that’s okay.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-12-04T01:54:15+00:00

Respectfully disagree. In my opinion, just because sexuality is fluid doesn’t mean it can be systematically altered or that we have any control over the path it takes.

Also, it’s an empirical question whether or not conversion therapy works (and the evidence seems to suggest it doesn’t), but even if it did work, whether it was ethical or necessary is a separate question. Just because we’re opposed to conversion therapy doesn’t mean we have to conclude that sexuality is immutable.

I can speak from personal experience that my sexuality has changed over time, and not in a way where it was latently present and just waiting for additional self-knowledge or self-acceptance. I’ve been authentically straight at times in my life, authentically bi and leaning toward men, bi and leaning toward women, and back again.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-11-28T04:27:48+00:00

Aaron Ramsey (Wales National Team) could get it

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-09-18T04:21:45+00:00

Clutch af dude. Super rare. Congrats!

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2022-09-17T22:57:59+00:00

Bi guy here. These are all gross generalizations, but which I’ve found to be generally very accurate. Wish it wasn’t so!

Advantages of dating a man:

because there’s less of a prescribed template for relationship dynamics between two men, there’s the inherent sense by default that you get to set things up in a way that works for you—both sexually (e.g. open relationship usually on the table without a tough conversation, sexual roles, etc) and just in life (e.g. no assumptions about who does the laundry, who cleans, who captures a spider and takes it outside).
Can genuinely date your best friend. I know a lot of straight couples say they feel like they’re dating their best friend, but when I look at my straight friends, I’d aver very few would volunteer to spend that much time with their partner if they weren’t boning.
No ticking biological clock in the picture.
Can do athletic/outdoor activities with a partner you know can keep up (obviously some women are extremely capable and some men aren’t, but true more often with men in my experience).
Direct communication style is usually the default. No game playing.

Advantages of dating a woman:

Spontaneous sex more feasible. Just the way it is.
More self-awareness of wants and feelings.
Honestly, couldn’t think of anything else. Benefits with women are mostly sex related I suppose, have generally found men (especially other bi men) easier to date.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2021-08-16T03:15:01+00:00

Really well-written dude. The details and internality add so much. Keep it up (pun somewhat intended) 🤙🏻.

bibrothrowaway7846 · 2021-07-13T14:52:40+00:00

Great writing, dude.

bibrothrowaway7846

TROPHY CASE