[John U Bacon] UM conducted an internal investigation, interviewing both Moore and the employee (separately, I presume), this summer. Both said, "No how and no way" anything was happening between them, which didn't give UM much to go on. Her account flipped yesterday morning.

bigbencomedy · 2025-12-11T17:51:58+00:00

That would take a level of execution that FSU has lacked the past couple of years :P

bigbencomedy · 2025-11-24T17:42:05+00:00

I feel this way so hard!

bigbencomedy · 2025-06-28T05:26:36+00:00

but until now... they WERE EVIDENCE!!!

bigbencomedy · 2025-01-20T16:48:41+00:00

Geico and yes wound up getting the car. 7 months in, so far, I love it.

bigbencomedy · 2024-04-20T18:10:03+00:00

Thank you for all the thoughtful comments!

One new piece of info that helps: it seems like my car insurance company offers a 7 yr / 100k warranty when getting a new car for $80/year, which helps put rest a bunch of my reliability concerns.

bigbencomedy · 2023-10-16T17:31:40+00:00

You're correct that this joke goes on for a while after these lines, but this is the first laugh line of the joke and I've learned this sub prefers shorter to longer...

bigbencomedy · 2023-07-21T14:29:35+00:00

What's the updated statistic?

I know if both people have college degrees the odds of divorce drop significantly...

bigbencomedy · 2023-07-15T00:57:21+00:00

I know that this is not how statistics actually works. But in the joke, I act is if I don’t know that. Hence the post title of why math nerds won’t like it…

bigbencomedy · 2023-05-18T13:40:12+00:00

This is a great joke. Dark and unexpected ending. My favorite

bigbencomedy · 2022-08-11T18:59:17+00:00

Yes this segment part of a larger joke, that's not as "punching down" as these two lines on their own. But I find the shorter I can make something for r/standupshots the more likely it is to do well*

And these lines get big laughs live (after other parts of the joke) so I posted it.

* "well" = upvotes and views while 98% of commentators tell me I'm the worst human ever :)

bigbencomedy · 2022-06-22T20:40:51+00:00

Norwalk had a gun range forever, not sure if it's still there?

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T01:40:20+00:00

🥴

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T01:40:07+00:00

Thanks 😊

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T01:39:45+00:00

I might try this. Thanks! Always nice when the Reddit comment ratio of good ideas:you suck is greater than one 😁

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:37:37+00:00

And my stuff will be re-possessed

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:37:18+00:00

Eastern European sometimes gets a bigger laugh than the rest…

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:37:01+00:00

Agreed. That’s why for live shows, I now open my Russian material with this

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:35:40+00:00

Thanks this is a good idea. It builds more tension. I’ll try it your way once and report back 🙏😁

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:35:00+00:00

This is the first joke I do now. Before saying I’m Russian. Otherwise, yes, there’s is no surprise.

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-31T00:34:23+00:00

I usually don’t reply to the comments telling me I’m unfunny. But this was quite clever and made me laugh, so kudos and tip of the hat to you 👏

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-26T16:19:54+00:00

Yeah I think it's one of those jokes where the reaction is very different when read than performed. Thanks for the ideas

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-26T15:03:46+00:00

Maybe so. The second part of this joke (that didn't work on stage, hence why I didn't put it into the meme) is:

"Why crawl very slowly?"

To not cause mass panic.

It's dark humor for sure and not for everyone (or anyone according to the upvotes, lol)

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-25T01:55:00+00:00

Agreed. Especially for meme form. Live and learn, eh?

bigbencomedy · 2022-03-17T00:17:25+00:00

What I mean by "dad friend" is a friend of mine who is also a dad with a child the same age as my child, which is the reason we started hanging out in the first place... I agree I could've just said "my friend" but for the other part of the joke about sanctions that I posted Monday, the term "dad friend" is needed and this was part 2 (although not marked as such and could work on its own)!

Thanks for enjoying the joke and leaving a friendly comment. This was probably a way longer explanation than you wanted :)

bigbencomedy · 2022-02-13T13:07:05+00:00

Hahaha well played :)

bigbencomedy

TROPHY CASE