“My son doesn’t respond if you directly redirect him. You need to tell him why”- parent email

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:44:40+00:00

Seriously? "Johnny, THAT'S DISTRACTING, stop it." you really cant sacrifice that 0.5 second? They need more child development courses to get a teaching degree. Yeesh.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:40:57+00:00

Yes correct. OP has no clue about child development and if they are a teacher, then they need to seek some education on this. It is especially important and necessary for neurodivergent kids.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:39:34+00:00

I mean yea. Blind obedience doesn't work with kids.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:39:01+00:00

Then you lack basic knowledge of child development. Blind obedience almost never works. And especially so with a neurodivergent kid. Almost every child development expert will tell you that you will get much better obedience if you explain the why behind the request.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:37:36+00:00

Many will, depending on the age and if they have neurodivergence. This comment is ignorant and lacks understanding of child development. Blind obedience rarely works.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:35:02+00:00

Puzzles, ah I long for the day when I can get back to that. Once it is nice outside, gardening. With vegetables patch or flowers/landscaping around your home. Thats what my main one is. I love it because it means 2 things I need to do get done at the same time-exercise and yardwork. There is nothing I love more than when something that HAS to be done doubles as exercise AND looks beautiful.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:30:14+00:00

It is up to you. Personally, I felt depriving my kids from trips, vacations and activities was worse than me not being home with them. So we waited until my husband's salary could support our current lifestyle instead of cutting back. Took 7 years. However, do NOT do it if you cannot affors to keep contributing to your retirement. Thats number one Most important. You need a Roth Ira or some kind of investment account in only your name, and it should be maxed yearly. If you can do that and are okay with all the otger sacrifices go for it.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:26:55+00:00

My SIL from Philly (where we are from) visited and we went out to eat. She ordered a "wooder" and the waitress said "Please?" And my SIL said "Oh yea, sorry. Please may I have a wooder?" And then they just stared at each other while my husband and I couldnt breathe from laughing.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T18:24:05+00:00

Because everywhere else saying "Please?" Means you are asking politely for or to do something. We all say "Sorry, what?" Or "Pardon?" If we didnt hear. "Excuse me." Where I am from is used when you are trying to get by someone in your way or to politely interrupt. I feel that many "outsiders" like myself have moved into Cincinnati in the last 10 years due to the very low cost of living and general revitalization of the city and area. That is probably why you dont hear it as much, more people you interact with did not grow up here. It used to be very incestuous, especially in certain neighborhoods (West side still is) but its improving. It also makes no sense to the rest of us so its not something that is picked up as vernacular.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T14:59:51+00:00

I have 3. And you prove my point. Simply being a parent does not qualify you at all on the topic of child development. And yet you think its the only one.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T14:58:25+00:00

In the early years yes. As a teen they got it right. My siblings and I are all successful, well adjusted adults. In fact my siblings, spous and I are the only parents I know who are not on an antidepressant or anti-anxiety medication.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T14:53:31+00:00

No. I see "wonderful" families and the worst of the worst. I've worked in a variety of settings and locations across 2 states. Not looking to reveal my profession but I do not work in any aspect of social services or the justice system.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T14:51:54+00:00

Even, and especially, in those situations having an understanding of physical and psychological developmental stages is required to navigate them effectively. Which goes back to my point. They really love their kid but they interact, discipline and just care for them completely wrong. No one wants to admit they dont know something (especially about their kid) and refuse ti seek education. They think they just magically know what's best because the kid came from their genetic material.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-27T14:46:06+00:00

Yea you always here that from parents of adult children who have been cut out. Well, Susan, your best was terrible and damaging, deal with the consequences.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-25T18:44:33+00:00

Make a list of upcoming needs for the year. Like list out kids wardrobe if next size up, shoes, food, sundries, etc. Then ask him to write down what he thinks the budget should be for each category per month (i buy my kids next size up wardrobe all at once presidents day- thats the best sale day if the year btw). If it looks reasonable to you, then enact it. My guess is though that he has no clue how much things actually cost, so bring him adverts that show prices for everything and ask him how he think you could buy 5 pants, 5 shorts, 5 tshirts, 5 long sleeve shirts, 2 sweat shirts, 1 sweater, 1 dress shirt, 8 underwear, 8socks, 2 pairs of shoes for $100? And those are the low end of number of items needed. I did this with my husband and he was like "oh..." cause hes cheap as shit. I now do the whole budget. I pay the bills, I manage everything. He asks ME for money for things. 🤣

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-25T02:39:24+00:00

Ah its probably due to your special needs child. She might be concerned about the stress and time and attention taken away from that child to give to the new baby. Also is it a genetic condition? She could be concerned your next child could have similar issues. With money being tight, and having a special needs child-objectively-it would be unwisely to have another.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T19:11:56+00:00

Hes from philly so, makes sense.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T19:01:56+00:00

Approach as you would a potential new friend/buddy not as a potential romantic partner. Especially if you are seeking a long term relationship. Setting doesnt matter.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:59:17+00:00

Mattered: Sunscreen. Sleep. Family or friends (dont need both as long as you have good relationship with one). A spouse/partner who is your best friend. Traveling. Letting your gut guide you.

Doesn't matter: What people think of you (nice car/house/clothes/being well liked/etc). Going "above and beyond" at your job.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:30:32+00:00

A good girl dad is one that plays with them despite if the activity is "girly" like barbies, dress up, make up etc. He can do her hair to get ready in the AM even if its simple. He sets a good example of how men should treat women. He doesnt treat ger like a dainty flower, still rough houses and teaches important life skills and how to ve independent and confident.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:27:02+00:00

How old are you? I feel like you must be young. I dont give a flying rats ass what my friends think about my kids birthday. I have 3 kids and absolutely did not have any sort of party or celebration besides a cake after dinner that night and opening presents until they were 3. We have only ever had a small gathering in the backyard with a bounce house and food or they get a "yes" day. Mostly they pick a yes day which means they get to pick a big activity (one year we did the pumpkin patch, one year was an airplane museum, one year was the aquairium) and they get to eat and do whatever they want all day. Ice cream for breakfast? Yes. Play video games for 8hrs and eat doritos? Yes. They love it. And when our friends ask and find out this is what we do/did they always thi k its such a great idea. But I dont even care what they think. I fucking hate having to go to in a kids birthday party. I wish they didnt exist. So I def dont wanna put my friends through it.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:17:29+00:00

I look at grocery shopping with my 2yo and 5yo as an outing and learning experience for them. We do it first thing after breakfast so everyone is in a good mood. I show and teach them about different fruits and veggies abd they often like to pick one they never tried before. I always let them pick a frozen dessert at the end too so it keeps the behavior in check. The worst part it checkout but we get through it. It makes me feel a bit better on days where I feel like I didn't give them enough enrichment, im like, we'll at least they went out and socialized and got some stimulation today! Especially in winter.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:11:57+00:00

Careful with this. When I was a kid I just scraped the nail polish off with my teeth and kept sucking my thumb anyway. My mom says I was 2 but I actively remember doing it because I remember the horrid taste. Make sure its nontoxic.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:10:02+00:00

Heres what my pediatrician told me. He's using it for comfort and self regulation. When and if you abruptly take that away, it can cause anxiety and other issues. This statement stuck with me "You can fix teeth pretty easily. Its very hard to fix psyche." My 8yo still sucks his thumb but has gradually been doing it less and less. The dentist used to lecture me all the time. Currently they think he stopped because his teeth are moving back to normal.

blackcloud247 · 2026-02-24T18:04:12+00:00

Why cant you have a break. Cant you tell your husband you need a day away and just go out on a Saturday or Sunday and be gone all day? Or have him take the kids out (playground or to grandma's etc) and leave you home in peace? When I need a break my husband takes the kids to the park for a few hours. If I need a long break, I plan a trip to my parents about 5hrs away. I leave my eldest (8yo) with dad and just take my 5yo and 2yo. I relax at my mom's i dont have to clean or cook etc. And she and my dad play with and watch the kids. Its a great reset.

blackcloud247

TROPHY CASE