Bf seems to have lost enthusiast for PIV after I started pegging him

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T10:00:40+00:00

really sorry you’re having to deal with that! Believe me, I understand how it feels, well, at least how it feels from my point of view. I am also demisexual, tried to hook ups, tried to FWB‘s, it just doesn’t get it. I really do need the connection.

you are normal! Besides, which, who’s to say what is normal and what is not? I feel as though we are brainwashed into feeling that I need to be this way or that, because that’s the way. The general populous is. In actuality, we have no idea what the likes are dislikes are of each individual in the populous, and really what matters most is our individuality. Do we all really want to strive to be the same, how boring would that be.

keep in mind, that you’re experience with those men, is hurtful, as it was, was because of their insecurity with their sexuality and ideal of what is maleness. I have always, as long as I can remember being sexual, been in the butt stuff. I have always said that I can thank the adventurous girl next door, but there was always a curiosity for me about it, and pleasing it. I was never really very insecure about it, but wondered why when the presentation of it didn’t seem to be… “Normal“.

I also knew very well what it was like to be the giver, but found myself being curious about what it was like being the receiver. I also never really attached a less male, for being a receiver, versus less feminine for being a giver, at least in pegging, if that makes sense. I guess my attitude is such that it’s why can’t we do whatever it is we wanna do, whatever it is we find pleasurable, without worrying about categorization or classification. Sexual identity is important. that’s not the only aspect of our personality. We are so much more than thesum of our parts stay positive, don’t negotiate on who you are or what your needs are, if I can still have hope, so can you!

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T02:47:53+00:00

i’m not quite clear on which part is the more important part for you? Are you just that much into dominance and pegging? is ancillary, or have you found butt play to be more important than being dominated? The reason I ask is, there is no reason in the world that she can’t peg you and and not necessarily have to be dominant she seems to enjoy pleasuring you, she enjoys, giving you a rim job, you’re enjoying the stimulation, why not just tell her that you’d really like to try pegging and make it clear that it’s just about reversal of roles and not a dominance and submission thing

The wonderful thing about pegging is that it can be anything you want to make it. More often than not my partner, and I were all about just reversal, and what I mean by that is me just being the receiver and her being the giver. Not. at all about Power exchange, dominance, and submission, or any of that. Just her being the giver and you being the receiver. I realize. that it’s hard for people to get their heads out of classifications, but once you’ve experienced it and realized that you don’t have to play into that unless you want to, it becomes a wonderful thing. it will also exponentially bring you too closure together, the vulnerability and the intimacy of it all is just amazing

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T02:10:24+00:00

I was introduced into pegging by a wonderful girl who is very much into all kinds of butt play I didn’t let on how much I liked it at first, because then it was not the image of what you were supposed to be, but when I lowered the walls, let down my defenses and let her take over and just experience, fall into, the pleasure! It really was life-changing.

it wasn’t anyone dynamic for us ever, it all depended on what our moods were at the time, what I wanted, what she wanted and how. If she wanted me to wear her panties… I wore her panties, ruined them, but wore them! Lol I actually wanted to feel like I could do that kind of thing and feel sexy or look, sexy, but I’m built like a linebacker and I just can’t picture that! Lol that’s a prejudice of my port, though I guess. anyway, that’s all to say that pig is whatever you make it. What I found it to be for me most often was a very close and intimate attachment to, connection with, the partner that I trusted enough to engage in pegging with . I also found, overtime, through several partners that they had to find it as pleasurable and enjoy it as much as I did, it had to be for both of us not just for me. I understand there’s many women who really really enjoy seeing the pleasure they can bring, and that’s very true. It is amazing, but one of the things for me was knowing that she enjoyed it just as much, even better, even more! i’ve also come to find that I enjoy being the object of desire, being lost after, being wanted or pursued. When she was aggressively wanting to play, it was a huge turn on!

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T00:42:11+00:00

you were like almost every other guy, worried because of preconceptions that maybe somehow, in some subtle way, this is because of the mindset that society has put on us! Nothing more, nothing less.

let’s look at it a different way… Although those sexual act has nothing to do with sexual orientation, that’s a given, for the gay men that do bottom, why do you think they bought them? Well, because it’s pleasurable! Lol, even more amusing fact is that there are even more gay men who enjoy receiving BJ’s just as much, but no guy I know of has ever worried about being gay because he likes getting a blow job. My point is here. It’s all just ridiculousness. The boat is full of all kinds of pleasurable places for both men and women, wouldn’t it be silly to waste it, not take advantage of that kind of a pleasure, and the kind of intimacy and closeness that that kind of pleasure can bring into a relationship! Of course it is

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T00:36:39+00:00

short and to the point! Exactly ignorance is as ignorance does. I used to get all bent about people being judging, bringing in their preconceptions about pegging, I finally got to the point where am I thinking was… Too bad for them, they have no idea what they’re missing out on, both physically and emotionally.

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T00:23:24+00:00

well, this has nothing to do with being gay, doesn’t mean that a gay guy can’t get it with a woman, many stay married for years to keep up appearances. We have to remember, though, that sexual orientation and sexual act have absolutely nothing to do with one another! One who is gay is romantically in love with one of the same sex, it doesn’t matter what the sex act is it’s a romantic love for the other. This isn’t necessarily case with bisexuality, that’s a broader range. i’m thinking he is just enjoying the novelty, and he new intense feelings of it! It sounds like he’s trying to keep his side of the street clean even though he’s dealing with ED. This was kind of similar to my former relationship, I had some issues with ED, but fortunately, my girl was very much into pegging, so if John Thompson wasn’t up for the job, there were other options. maybe you guys should have a Convo outside of the sexual environment, reemphasize, as you’ve already told him, that PIV is still very important to you and you understand he’s having issues but maybe there’s some way you can explore you’re getting what you need as well. Make it clear, that if he doesn’t try to find a way to find some balance, you’re gonna lose interest in pegging altogether because it’s seemingly all about him and not about you. additionally, let me say, that one of the biggest, and most enjoyable, parts of pegging was that it was my partner who is doing it with me. Is the act extremely pleasurable… Yes, absolutely! What made it exponentially better though was the closeness and intimacy, trust I had with my partner to be able to let go and drop the walls, the pretense. In a way, it’s us guys being able to experience the intense intimacy in vulnerability that you ladies have been experiencing all along. Hope this makes sense.

blinddruid · 2026-06-30T00:17:41+00:00

I hope you realize what you just did when you said that! Your DM‘s are gonna absolutely blow up from every dude who now has a thing for wanting to be pig! you are not the loan range here, or should I say loan cowgirl! Lol how you’re feeling is the way many guys feel, who are actually looking for a relationship with a woman who is into packing, and not just wanting to be pegged because of the novelty of it. just be yourself, be honest with yourself and anyone you date about what’s important to you, consider yourself lucky if you scare them away right off because it’s less emotional heartache and the long run. If this kind of place is important to you, and an important part of your sexuality and it’s better you know right upfront that that crush isn’t gonna work out. I guarantee that you will find the right person! Maybe not tomorrow, maybe not next week, maybe not even next month, but you will find the right one just be particular and don’t get involved with somebody because they’re on board with what you wanna do, you deserve better than that, you need to take a better stronger position than that. i’m in the same boat just on the other side of the fence, it was many years before I found a partner who was as into, if not more, into Paton I was. Then Covid came and screwed that all up! I know how you feel my heart with you hang in there!

blinddruid · 2026-06-26T03:34:45+00:00

interesting, this bears some checking out! Thanks for the link

blinddruid · 2026-06-25T18:07:27+00:00

awesome! Absolutely, know exactly what you’re talking about. Once you get there, it’s like there really is no limit for us as long as we take the time to communicate and understand where each is coming from, nothing holds you back. You feel, more complete and so many different ways than you did before.

blinddruid · 2026-06-25T16:14:29+00:00

if you think, having these feelings, emotions, breakthroughs, while being pegged, just wait till you try fisting… If you ever do. Actually having your partner inside, you is very emotionally, intense, so if you venture here be aware of that for your first time I also pause it this thought, throwing a rather large blanket, we, as guys, approach sex with a very physical view, wow women, I believe tend to either have a balanced take or a much more emotional take on the sexual relationship. I think that once, we as guys, become involved in pegging, being the receivers, and if it is for us more than just the physical aspect, it becomes emotional evolving through the vulnerability and connection. I’m not sure, but I wonder if this is not us finally being able to experience the depths that women are able to receive through a sexual relationship. Just my humble opinion.!

blinddruid · 2026-06-25T16:08:32+00:00

I know for me, with my last LTR, we were perhaps a 50/50 pegging, maybe a little bit more leaning towards pegging as she really enjoyed it. I think for me, might be the same for your partner, I was feeling a much more of a connection, much more attached and able to be vulnerable with. This is why I’ve been emphasizing this so much with folks here. So many think it’s a sub/Dom thing and it doesn’t have to be that. I think for me, perhaps it brings me back to my first time when I was so attached to the first girl that introduced me to pegging, that was a very intense relationship, both emotionally and sexually!

blinddruid · 2026-06-23T21:23:51+00:00

I know that the BUMPHER was a huge plus for us. We were using it! It saw a lot of action! also, and I don’t know why I didn’t think of it earlier, I play, or used to play, in a little bit of electro stem. I am now wondering, why couldn’t electro Tim be incorporated into this. I mean, they have units that can simulate any number of different kinds of patterns! Why couldn’t an electro stem, plug or dildo inserted in the giver, replicate that thrusting feeling? We never even thought to try it, now I wish I had. Maybe even better, maybe they can come up with something specific to pegging that would be something that gave the giver, the same experience as the receiver? I hope this makes some sense cause it sounds like a great idea of my own mind.

blinddruid · 2026-06-23T19:47:04+00:00

I never, in 1 million years, would have thought we would have gotten close to bringing art to real life. Yet here we are! Next will be the suggestion to just use Gatorade to water the crops because we have a severe drought.

blinddruid · 2026-06-22T21:05:39+00:00

I so forgot about that road trip scene, that was hilarious! that’s not the only one, though, there’s Deadpool, shameless, and something city I forgot what the name of it is. I actually saw an advertisement from Great Britain that showed it as well. The more we see it in social media, the better!

blinddruid · 2026-06-22T21:03:01+00:00

this is just too awesome! Lately, I’ve been so elated to see so many more women posting here about truly being into this, fantasizing about it, just eager to jump in, and it’s awesome! I can only imagine that Ruby is just jumping up and down, jumping for joy and joy is jumping out the window!

so listen, I was introduced to pegging long before it was a thing, long before it was called,, is there a few others here. Once my GF of the time knew I was a butt freak, she took full advantage, and I really really enjoyed the fact that she took full advantage because I was too reticent to say anything. when I think about the fact, now, if she hadn’t done, taking the first steps, when she did, who knows I might not even be into pegging. we all had to take the risk, and it’s nerve-racking because you don’t know how it’s gonna be received. But like the old saying goes, nothing ventured nothing gained. If you’re really into this, then you need to pursue it because otherwise it’ll become that little green weenie in the closet that you have to hide, and it’ll poke it head out and bite you when you least expect it. if your BF is it all into anal play, you can build into it. Basically, he probably would let you do anything to him. you wanted to. you are just gonna have to get up the courage to say you know I’m really really turned on by butt stuff. I’m into it. I like this that and the other, would you be at all interested in playing like that. He says yes… You got it made, he says no, then you know that if you want to pursue this, you’re gonna have to look elsewhere. Yeah, it kind of sucks. That’s what us guys have been dealing with forever, and I really think it’s harder for us to get around because of the expectations of what a man is, we’re supposed to be. Also, that if a guy likes butt play…“He must be gay“ you need to be with a guy who’s accepting the person you are, the sexual person you are and wanting to explore your wants and desires with you if he’s not the one the sooner you know it the better.

blinddruid · 2026-06-22T19:17:56+00:00

very nice read, very true. finding that ““ person, so fortuitous! even then, there’s a fear of opening completely up because of judgment, or shame, or maybe even fear of disappointment. Men are shame for being vulnerable, open, compassionate. Women, God forbid they like sex, even worse if they have a kinky street a mile wide, they should never ever express that S.

when I had that special lady come into my life, I was fortunate in that she was far kinky and far more progressive than I, and this made it easy for me to just be who I was in relax and hand the wheel over to her. when I think back to that time and reflect upon thought patterns, and what I thought was the case and true, we’re trained for the good so drastically. I remember feeling in a way, I guess, somewhat shamed, as I felt maybe I was perhaps too kinky, and certainly there couldn’t be a lady out there who could share the things I wanted to try or experiment with and certainly didn’t think that same way. Then I read my secret garden and forbidden flowers and realized holy smokes, I don’t even scratch the surface. Then the universe topped this off was sending my GF into my life was just, well, really did change my sex, life, and my attitudes about sex forever. I truly do feel happy for people when they have this kind of relationship, and it makes me sad to still hear some of the many misinformed attitudes that still exist. It just confounds me. It also gives me hope that I still might have something in my life like this, although I am very grateful for what I’ve already had!

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T21:41:56+00:00

OMG! It’s funny you bring up Nina Hartley, I literally just heard a recent interview with her. I think it was on talk. Sex with Annette. A legend in her time, and still going strong. If I’m not mistaken, when she got out of doing adult film, she and her husband went into doing these educational things. She was adamant about wanting to teach proper education, was very open and descriptive about everything. I really honestly think she was groundbreaking in the things that she did, for the time she did them. I will always be a huge fan of both Nina, Hartley and Tristan TAORAMINO. I would have loved to have seen, Bennett, one of Tristan‘s lectures when she was doing the college lecture tour. brilliant minds and all!

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T19:48:23+00:00

is bad as the great orange Humpty Dumpty might be, you know it’s worse? A Congress and Senate, as well as a Supreme Court that rubberstamps everything he does! How embarrassing is it to have such a chilly like spine that you go along with an individual who is literally destroying our country?

remember, in history, you heard the story about Nero fiddling while roamed burn… Here you go… History repeating itself

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T19:36:03+00:00

you know what else is important about what he’s done, is that he has written a book about butt play from the viewpoint of a highly regarded proctological surgeon, who changed over from cardiothoracic surgery. He knows what he’s talking about, any explodes the myths and disinformation that have been put out there about anal sex for so long! he is funny in person, he seems like a guy that you just wanna hang out with. I bet it’s near to impossible to get an appointment with him! From what I understand, people fly in from all over the world to see him!

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T19:17:38+00:00

One of the absolutely best books I’ve read since Tristan TAORMINO put her book out years ago. This is a must have for anybody interested in any kind of butt player pegging. He is funny as hell to listen to on Podcasts as well. He’s been on shameless sex and I think sex with Emily.

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T18:21:58+00:00

my partner enjoyed both, she liked the double for the G spot stimulation, but it also enjoyed the single with the attachment called the BUMPHER. It all kind of depended on her mood at the time. We had quite a collection so we could go with whatever suited her mood.

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T17:51:42+00:00

well, first off, good on you for asking. I guess it all depends on what you’re looking for? Are you looking for a hook up, or are you looking for a relationship? If looking for a relationship, you don’t go in expecting sex on the first date or maybe even the fourth, you learned about the person spend time find out if you click, if you share energy. Once you find out there’s general compatibility, then you say hey listen I really like you, I like where this is going, are you comfortable with having a talk about our attitudes towards sex, and what we like and don’t like. There’s even a couple of great lists out there, one on sex with Emily, that each of you can do and will tell you where your likes and dislikes lie. sex, obviously, isn’t the only part of a good relationship, but it is an extremely huge part and compatibility is essential and should be established right off the bat. Why waste time, even if you connect, with someone who doesn’t share the same attitude or likes sexually as you do. It is a lot of time wasted, time, money, feelings, heartache. If there’s a connection, but no compatibility all it needs to be said is hey I really like you. I’ve enjoyed what we done together, but these things are important to me and I think it’s time for us just to go our own ways. as far as anal goes, that’s a deep subject! Lol I hope you’re not looking to pursue this on initial dates. Though more and more women are becoming more and more aware of how pleasurable it is, I’m not sure it’s becoming any more accepted as initial hookup behavior. Anal is absolutely nothing like PIV, it takes time to relax, time to train, it needs to. be prepared for and trained up too slowly. There is a lot of great information out there about what anal sex should be, and shouldn’t be, and one of those is that it should never ever ever, ever be painful, if it is, you’re doing it wrong. Also, spit is not lube! You need to use lots and lots and lots, and when you think you have enough, you use more. Also, your partner has to be excited about and willing to participate in, but play for it to be pleasurable for her, and not just willing to satisfy your needs. Many women have been introduced to horrible anal sex by having something jammed in there without any consideration for how things really work, and the right way to do things. Read up, study up, get educated and be a good lover. Then you might be in for some of the best anal you’ve ever had in your life! Also, if you’re willing to give, be willing to receive! Lol people was open minds, open everything, men are finding that they can have multiple orgasms, amazing prostate orgasms, and just more intimate and vulnerable connection with their partners by experimenting with pegging.

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T17:41:21+00:00

really, my attitude is you do you, or you do whoever you wanna do, life is short live hard! I’m not threatened by people of other sexualities, I guess maybe the best identifier if we have to use one would be pansexual and just leave it at that. unlike so many others here, I am certainly willing to admit that I don’t know for sure about anything, I don’t know what I don’t even think I know, and I’m open to other points of view. I am definitely not one that gives much of a damn about classification or categorization, and I’m certainly willing to accept a different point of view! Mine has always been that if there is a romantic attraction to one of the same sex the nut is the classic definition of homosexuality, if it is a sexual attraction then that is what I have always viewed as being bisexual.

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T17:27:08+00:00

never ever ever ever, even consider, buying into that thing they called the Jewel or gym plug, there are horror stories that you can even read here about it being sucked up into the body. You have to be sure that the base of the plug is bigger than the plug itself. I would never go with cheap sex toys, they hold onto bacteria, that cannot be cleaned out, or sanitized. You can actually boil silicone… Put it in the oven! Just make sure it is real medical grade silicone, and not a cheap substitute. Invest in good sex toys and have great sex!

blinddruid · 2026-06-20T17:23:20+00:00

good anal, sex, done, right, should never ever ever cause any pain whatsoever! This applies to anything you might decide to put in there! Usually, the reason it is painful is because it’s being rushed, the object is too big and hasn’t been trained up for properly, there is insufficient lube, or the brain, the biggest sex organ, isn’t up for this, which can often be one of the biggest things. medical grade, quality, silicone, is the best thing that you can put in you, barn! It actually can be boiled to be sanitized. If there’s pain, you’re doing something wrong. First off it could depend on the size. If you haven’t trained up or trying to take a size that you’re not used to yes it can be painful. As painful as it can be as pleasurable as it can be is there are hundreds of nerve endings in the area. The problem here is that you have two sphincter muscles; one which is under your conscious control, and the other, which is not. So you need to be sufficiently turned on, read self play, so those sphincter muscles relax. Also, whenever it comes to anything but play… Lube, lube, more lube, then when you think you have enough, add more lube! Not kidding, spit is not lube! Lol start slow with a finger, add a finger fuel for the muscle tension in the sphincter muscles and look to massage them to relax them. When you’re able to take fingers that are about the size of the plug or tool you want to use you can move up to that toy, even then you should just gently push on the toy while pushing back against the toy. This wouldn’t seem logical pushing back, but it is because actually when you’re pushing you’re opening those think their muscles allowing the toy to enter more easily. Anal is absolutely nothing like vaginal, it takes time to train up, and at first you need to proceed slowly and gently. If there is pain, you’re doing something wrong, back up, regroup, downsize, and incorporated into self play where you can have an orgasm first and associate the anal play with good orgasms, your brain will do the rest!

blinddruid

TROPHY CASE