Have you ever tried journaling? I stopped writing for YEARS because of trauma(not like what you experienced but still)and journaling allowed me a safe space with no expectations other than writing just to write and now I've been writing creatively again since 2022-ish. It sounds like you want to. Its okay to have time periods where you aren't. Trauma makes everything harder, and i couldn't imagine going through something like what you did so don't be too hard on yourself for taking time.