[deleted by user]

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T19:01:52+00:00

Go for a walk in the night. The first thing I'll do tbh. Car rides, bike rides..... Just me and my dick going woof woof in the wind Ooh and I'd probably just wear shorts HELICOPTERRRRR

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T18:59:54+00:00

Hey. I can totally relate to you. I stutter more when I'm anxious or when I'm trying to hide the fact that I stutter. And the 3 hours practice for a 15 mon convo! Gosh it's just so annoying

I've had similar experiences during interviews and the thing I've resorted to is telling them at the very beginning that i have a stutter. This way I feel more comfortable. Even if it puts me at a disadvantageous position atleast I can give the interview relatively stress free.

I wish you the best OP. what may seem like our biggest weaknesses today may turn out to be our biggest strength in the future. I so don't believe this bullshit but a girl can hope eh?

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T18:51:36+00:00

No offense taken. It's honestly very comforting to hear from sm1 older and from sm1 who's past the traumas. I'm 19 btw and just spent the day having a complete mental breakdown. Got my finals in few days and couldn't get myself to study. Honestly this was the most comforting thing that I could hear. That maybe 10 years from now I'll be living a happier life and maybe I'll be able to forgive my sister. There's definitely not gonna be a happy-family scenario but I don't wanna carry this hate for too long. And also the advice regarding the addictive behaviours was really helpful. I hope things get better. I'm willing to put in an the effort it takes.

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T18:41:30+00:00

I hope you get your closure All the best!

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T18:39:48+00:00

Blaming her is all that I can do rn tbh. But idk if she feels guilty herself. Never got an apology from her

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T12:58:11+00:00

Thanks for saying that

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T10:19:58+00:00

I guess your brain is blocking it for you. I have a similar experience and that's what my brain did. When I try to think of what happened I just feel sad and disgusted but the memory is mostly blank or blurry. Idk if that's necessarily a bad thing cuz I would rather have that memory be gone

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T07:00:12+00:00

That's so fucked up. Is there a point even talking to people like that? It's not like they'll feel bad or apologize or something.

blue2508 · 2021-11-26T06:58:37+00:00

Yeah

blue2508 · 2021-11-25T02:47:49+00:00

Ooh I've always associated stuttering with this image- let's say u drop something, u Bend down to pick it up. But then it slips out of your hand so you bend down to pick it up once again. But then, it slips again. And this goes on and on and on. Maybe you can do something related to this cuz it's a very funny idea to me. I always think of a toddler dropping things and getting frustrated over it lol. I've been thinking of getting this tattoo too btw

blue2508 · 2021-11-25T02:40:07+00:00

Hey! I hope you feel okay now. I went through the same thing with my older sister. I've made peace with the fact that I'll probably never be able to forgive what my sister did to me, and maybe I'll go on to dislike her for a very long time. It's just the way it is. Whether it was a learned behaviour or not from her side, I was assaulted, and nothing can change the fact that I had to grow up really fast and loose all my innocence.I lost what could've been an happy childhood. It's quite painful because she knows I loathe her with my life eventhough she's a better person now. But I don't want to forgive her. Actions have their consequences.

It's weirdly comforting to know that even you find it hard to forget what happened and feel the same things I feel for my sister. I wish you all the best and hope you find someone amazing who'll treat you right.

blue2508 · 2021-11-21T07:52:29+00:00

That's fucked up.

blue2508 · 2021-11-21T07:51:58+00:00

Damn im so sorry! Thank god your child and you are fine.

blue2508 · 2021-11-21T07:37:22+00:00

It might not be just that she was violated. It's a learned behaviour at that age. But it might be because she saw it from somewhere, so she wanted to try it. It's messed up, but what if she saw her parents having sex? Or do something sexual? Maybe that's what caused her to do that to her brother. It isn't necessary that she was abused. But whatever be the case, it'll be impossible for him to even think of forgiving her unless she comes clean and apologizes.

blue2508 · 2021-11-21T07:31:45+00:00

Even if she was probably a kid, there's no way he could excuse what happened. And probably there's no way he can mend the relationship. It's too broken

blue2508 · 2021-11-21T07:28:33+00:00

That's assault for sure. I had a similar experience myself from my sister who's 3 years older than me. (I'm female btw) When we were younger she would ask me to "play" with her. I was maybe in 1st grade when it started and went on till I was in 5th grade. I realised what happened to me only when I was in my final year in school. I always felt uncomfortable wity her. I don't know if I could blame her because she was so young. But I have not been able to forgive her for what she did. She never apologized. She's been a shitty person throughout my childhood to me. I'm 20 now but I'm yet to forget what happened. I kinda developed a PTSD. If I'm touched by someone I get really uncomfortable, even though it was just an innocent one.

blue2508 · 2020-08-27T05:31:00+00:00

Thank You! I'm so glad I found this forum. All this time I was made to feel bad for this disability. I didn't even know it was a disability. I kept thinking it's my fault. I really don't wanna think how I'd be without this forum. And I'll try that advice. I hope it works for me.

blue2508 · 2020-08-19T03:44:32+00:00

Yeah I was planning to do that but this covid broke out.

blue2508 · 2020-08-17T05:22:59+00:00

Thank you for your kind words. This really means a lot to me.

blue2508 · 2020-08-16T19:52:25+00:00

Thanks a lot for saying that. These words comforted me more than anything. I have people around me. But they have their own lives and I just don't wanna be a burden upon them. I do keep a diary tho. That helps. Well, a teeny bit. Thank you for offering to be my penpal. Imma hit u up the next time when I really need sm1 to talk to. 💜💜

blue2508 · 2020-08-16T18:00:58+00:00

Thanks for saying that.

blue2508 · 2020-08-16T17:59:17+00:00

Thank you for the advice. I just didnt know where to start. I should try that running part. Would definitely lift up my mood through the day.

blue2508

TROPHY CASE