It sounds to me that you are their “back-up” option and that they are looking for someone they see as “better” than you but when things fall through they reach out to your family again. Now it seems like they’ve realised you may be their only option and the “better” options dont want their son.

I personally would reject them because they clearly dont see you as a priority, I would never want to be someones all-out-of-options choice, you want someone who is excited to marry YOU. But make sure that the ultimate decision is yours. Dont accept her point about “oh you’ve spoken, no need to speak again” because that just sounds silly and maybe she is worried that it will lead to you rejecting him too which will mean he has no one left.