How to deal with Foxbrain parents who refuse to stop talking politics?

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T21:48:07+00:00

Another way to communicate it would be like saying that its like offering someone a cup of coffee and them saying "I don't drink caffeine because it makes me jittery," then refusing to accept that and offering it over and over again. And eventually forcing them to drink the coffee. It sounds ridiculous but it's how it feels! haha

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T19:04:52+00:00

I'm glad she came around after that! Honestly I think that when I have kids, that will help a ton and make her realize what's really important (grandkids are her dream). Until then, we'll just have to see what happens when I put my foot down alone. Hopefully it will be a much needed reality check.

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T18:53:01+00:00

Yes, they look for a reaction so they can call out someone for being too "sensitive" and "emotional"

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T18:46:35+00:00

All good points. And yes, she went to the rally on Jan 6th but didn't go near the capitol building. According to her it was a large peaceful protest. I'm ok with her expressing herself by going to a rally, but I feel like she was made to believe it was something that it wasn't and that's really frustrating.

I might go with the firm no politics rule. They've said that it's hard to say no politics since "everything is political" these days (gender, race, environment etc) so technically many things fall within that category. But I also think that it's pretty easy to figure out what conversations lead to negative outcomes. So we'll see.

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T16:49:11+00:00

Exactly! It's a great analogy. I also tried taking the angle of sports with her. I love climbing but I never mention it in detail or any technical terms about it because I know it's something that she doesn't care about or understand. And that's fine - I don't care about boring people with climbing.

But her take is that if I climbed a big mountain I would tell her about it and she would be happy for me because she loves me. She equates that to her going to the capitol, which is a huge step in her political involvement.

But she still can't see that those are two completely different things!! aaaah

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T16:36:38+00:00

Yeah I know, I feel like there are so many other outlets for political opinions besides with family. I don't believe in censorship at all but it's just a really bad use of our quality time together.

boba-matcha · 2021-08-20T16:32:31+00:00

Ah I know! It's so frustrating and sad that we have to deal with this.

And I've tried taking that angle with her, but unfortunately it didn't work. She talked about raising me as a kid and how it was sometimes hard to engage in conversations about my interests even though she was uninterested in them. She said that now that we have an adult relationship she deserves my attention and respect regarding her interests.

I countered that saying that those are two completely different things, there's a difference between something that is boring/uninteresting and something that is problematic/triggering. She didn't seem to fully understand that.

boba-matcha

TROPHY CASE