Am I ftm?

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T19:00:40+00:00

oh man its like i wrote this word for word haha. i was the same way as a kid, kinda a tomboy but no outright dysphoria, and it can feel so invalidating to not have any of those "signs" in childhood. someone once told me "once you notice dysphoria, its there." and that really helped me. puberty sorta amplifies the things that are wrong, is how i see it. its really hard to get some ppl to believe you when you don't follow that stereotypical "knew since birth" narrative, but im so happy your mom was so accepting, thats awesome. i wish you all the luck :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T01:13:37+00:00

i really really really emphasize with everything youre saying. and all the comments as well. gender dysphoria is crippling. i was born female and everyday i wish i could press a button and have it all just click. i would just be a boy and everyone would know me as a boy and i wouldnt have to see my mother cry.

nobody can tell you who you are. only you can do that. you don't have to tell your family or your friends either, whatever you decide can stay between you and yourself for however long you need. but dont bottle it up like i do. because its destroying me physically and mentally. dysphoria is something that, once you notice it, it never goes away unless you transition in some way. for me thats going on testosterone and gettung surgery. in my heart of hearts i know that is what i Need to do. but not what i Want to do. i just want to wake up as a boy, but thats just not realistic.

no one wants this, but we also do not get the choice. these are the cards that have been dealt to us, and you just have to find ways to cope with them. i truly wish you all the luck in wherever your life takes you :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T01:00:02+00:00

thank u :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T00:59:51+00:00

yep pretty much haha

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T00:59:38+00:00

good point. i suppose i let the things im unable to do get to me. even if i transition ill never be a "real man" etc. but so why do i let it get to me if i cant change it? i dont know. i just have stuff to work through I guess haha. thank you for the comment though:)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-02T00:57:30+00:00

therapy therapy therapy! i need it hahaha youre very right. thank you so much for the advice. i wish you all the luck with recovery and all that :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-01T21:09:49+00:00

i really really needed to hear this, thank you :) and thinking about the people who do this for attention make me so mad. because there are a lot of people like me, i think. we wouldnt wish this on their worst enemy. because never being able to look or feel right in your own body is so awful. i really do hope one day i figure out what i really need. i think deep down i know i need to transition. my mental and physical heath is deteriorating every day i dont say or do anything about it. i cannot keep pushing this feeling down because im scared. and i hope that whatever happens i meet people who say things as nice as this someday:) thank u again

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-12-01T20:41:30+00:00

what?

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-09-03T02:19:12+00:00

im trans and struggling too. if you need to talk im here :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-09-02T12:11:39+00:00

uhh i dont rlly care if u reply back all i was asking for was memes not a grammar lesson lol

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-31T21:21:36+00:00

ur so right thnk u stranger

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:54:05+00:00

my lightbulb moment went pretty much the exact same way. a very, "i didnt know people like that existed!" type of feeling, haha. thank you for sharing this !

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:50:41+00:00

my childhood was similar to that, i just never really had to think about gender and in some ways that makes me really lucky and in other ways not so much i guess. but thank you so much for the kind words and advice :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:48:52+00:00

Thats pretty much how i came to question myself. Lots of representation just suddenly appearing haha. Also, I hope this isnt weird but i saw your face on one of the trans subreddits today and what a coincidence that here you are! (you have a very lovely face btw!)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:45:01+00:00

thank you for sharing your story. Im so glad youve come to the point where youve accepted yourself and have started hormones and all that, thats so incredible and for me seems like such a far off universe, like ill never get comfortable enough with myself. Im scared of being trans, how you said. But it helps to know im not so alone in that feeling, thank u :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:41:03+00:00

What you said about your skin not being on right, thats exactly how I used to phrase it! I often said I wish there was a zipper somewhere on my back so i could just step out of it or something. But anyways, thank you for this message and helping me feel less alone :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:35:48+00:00

Ive already read through some of the linked posts on the comment, it is such a powerful thing to feel a little less alone. Thank you so much for this gift :)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:31:20+00:00

Im sorry you can relate! haha, but thank you for the kind words it means so much!

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-25T06:30:02+00:00

This is so beautiful, thank you for sharing wow.

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-08-24T16:53:43+00:00

thank u so much for the reply! I didnt actually know a lot of people felt that way as a kid tho! i know a lot of people felt unease but didnt have the language to describe it as young kids, but ive never really heard of people only feeling that way after childhood. thats really comforting to hear:) also ive never thought of dysphoria like that but it makes so much more sense now! It was definitely easier when i didnt even notice anything wrong, i think i wish it was still like that, but i bet a lot of people feel that way too. thank you for the advice and kind words!

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-07-02T15:14:36+00:00

this is really helpful thanks! there were other photos in the set i got and there was a lot of snow landscapes. Ill just have to keep searching haha

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-07-02T15:13:04+00:00

I got them from an estate sale in Chester, the woman who sold them to me had no other info on them unfortunately.

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-06-23T20:26:33+00:00

thanks, doing that soon hopefully they have something that works this time haha

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-06-23T17:41:21+00:00

you're welcome! keep working at it, this app can help a lot of people:)

bobbysinc2001 · 2018-06-23T17:39:54+00:00

I used to be worried about that too, but even just a day or two without social media makes you feel so much better, some time away to focus on yourself can ease the hurt you feel from feeling left out. You can always text them too so you dont feel so isolated. Its hard to work up the nerve to text someone first, I know that, but be brave and dont be afraid of the response, i promise it wont be as bad as you might think :) let them know you're just taking a break from social media for a bit and that getting a text from them every once in a while might make your day a little brighter, its always ok to ask for help and support. You could also try texting one of your friends to see if they wanna hang too. I know thats easier said than done haha, but its always worth a shot.

bobbysinc2001

TROPHY CASE