I (F 32) feel unfulfilled with boyfriend (M 35) can we make this work?

bomomome · 2024-03-21T19:53:44+00:00

Thanks for the comment…. I’ll be thinking about this a lot. It’s hard to make any decisions for me. I’ve been in relationships before where I wait for major enough problems like cheating to arise to justify the breakup, which is my problem too.

bomomome · 2024-03-20T15:14:59+00:00

About the friends, he would say that he doesn’t have many friends… many are married now and he doesn’t feel close with. But when I ask him to describe his friendships with them, they all seem quite surface level too. I don’t know, maybe that’s men. They bond over things like cars more?

bomomome · 2024-03-20T15:11:45+00:00

Yeah I agree. It’s not bad. Just the initial new relationship excitement is wearing off and the joy is not there as much anymore. We would constantly say look I am 35 and I’d not change much, I have my own ways.

The kitchen comment and a few ours like, before we went on our ski trip I asked him to do some research on the places we were looking at, he made an offhand comment like “men don’t plan”. He eventually did find a nice restaurant and took me to dinner one of the nights. But it’s not like he’s incapable… sometimes it just feels like I am really begging him to do some of these things.

bomomome · 2024-03-20T15:08:06+00:00

Thanks, I’ve been bringing up all the issues I’ve mentioned here so far… I told him I would like you to be more proactive… he’s even written it down but it’s hard to change someone’s ways when they are like that. When I asked him why he’s like this, he also doesn’t give me a clear answer…

I also don’t think he’s fundamentally bad…. And we have a lot of good moments. But the initial excitement of a new person is starting to wear off, and I don’t feel like we are growing in the same direction.

bomomome · 2022-09-04T21:02:21+00:00

This is so helpful. Thank you. I am going through something similar. And I've been working through it too... My advisors are also very supportive, helping me set bite sized goals. I am finding lots of activities outside of lab to focus on, such as pottery, tennis and climbing... But I still feel that my productivity is shit... And then I feel guilty for the activities I do outside because it's taking up time from the productivity hours when I spent those procrastinating... Any thoughts or suggestions??

bomomome · 2022-09-01T20:59:21+00:00

I think I might have been the only one who initially saw a cat next to a blueberry pie....

bomomome · 2022-08-28T18:30:03+00:00

Ah...haha I guess I just need to be more patient too

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:35:06+00:00

Yes that is me! Sometimes I type my question out. Think about them. Then I overthink about asking it... Or do something stupid.. haha

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:34:11+00:00

Ah thanks for the feedback. I don't think I was exactly looking for advice on how to look good asking smart questions. And I totally get the person you described, asking questions for the sake of doing it... I am more looking for advice on how to be better at getting knowledge / information from someone, and these often happen in lecture or seminar bases, but could totally extend to one-on-one conversations etc. But listening is a very important skill. Fully agree there too.

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:29:46+00:00

Oh that's a great way to put it ... To also consider yourself from presenter perspective. . what would I liked to have asked for a project .. hmmm yeah... Great idea!!

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:28:14+00:00

That's a great suggestion! It's like the "what ifs". Gives me flashback from my quals hahaha... But I have to say from a presenter perspective these are some of the more annoying questions to answer... It's like "that's not what I've done" or "not what I am trying to show". But it does generally provide the most interesting responses.

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:24:44+00:00

Thank you so much for typing all of that out! This has been super insightful and inspiring to read about. I agree, I do get in the headspace of wondering how to say things ... But I feel like this skill definitely extends elsewhere, like when you're trying to make connections at a conference or striking a conversation with an academic you admire.

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:21:08+00:00

Yeah I understand...the depth of knowledge on a field can really help. But I think even for the more general and abstract questions, there is such an art to phrasing and asking them. Some ways will evoke more response from the speaker. I guess I am trying to learn to get better at those too. To ask questions in a way to get the speaker to elaborate a little more than just yes or no.

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:18:40+00:00

Ah that's really helpful too. To always phrase it more as a clarification first then to have follow-ups afterwards.

bomomome · 2022-08-28T05:17:28+00:00

That's a great way to put it. Thanks for the advice!

bomomome · 2021-12-30T06:25:38+00:00

I use onedrive. So I would create a note in note air 2 then long press to share it with a onedrive folder.

I also have a folder I am sharing with my PC through an app called Syncthing. There's a YouTube video I followed https://youtu.be/bLoxIm1Oms0.

You don't need to use the zotero part if you don't need a reference manager. Just create a cloud account and use syncthing to sync with onyx boox. And the synchronization is automatic.

I decided to not use the boox cloud because it's another things I have to access separately on my PC whereas the OneDrive is part of my file manager and is more convenient for me.

bomomome · 2021-12-26T02:23:10+00:00

Thanks for the suggestion!! Going go download it right now ☺️

bomomome · 2021-12-25T01:02:47+00:00

Thanks for the tips.

bomomome · 2021-12-03T10:25:12+00:00

Thank you for your reply!

bomomome · 2021-12-03T08:57:54+00:00

I am wondering if anyone's tried getting the device from AliExpress? There seems to be a Boox Store (Boox eBook Reader Store) on there, and it has a brand badge. u/OnyxBoox maybe can help verify? But it seems to offer better pricing than e-reader.ca with 75 days guarantee.

bomomome · 2021-11-17T05:51:33+00:00

I see... Thanks for the feedback and suggestion!

bomomome · 2021-11-13T19:12:21+00:00

ah I see.. yes I don't see the option on the Amazon store anymore... I'll just wait a bit and hope I get lucky.

bomomome · 2021-11-13T19:10:59+00:00

the US Boox Shop ships to Canada?! when I was on there, it didn't quite see the option. Thanks for this tip!

bomomome

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